completely new, need HELP!

[elizmac]

hi - I have just discovered your site after finding Tracy's first book, and not finding it very helpful for what I need to do. I need to buy the other book, but in the meantime, thought I would reach out for help.

Some details - I have a 5 month old boy, who cannot put himself to sleep. I tried ferberizing him, but do not think all that crying is healthy. I have just shush/patted him to sleep, took 30 mins... He does not sleep well during day, 2-3 45 min naps.

My questions are:

1. He has started solids recently, and has been eating three solid meals a day plus 6 breastfeeds. I am not sure how to cut this down to three meals per day - what is considered appropriate for his age per Tracy's book. Is milk considered a meal? If someone could share ideas with me, I would really apreciate it.

2. He has been waking 2-3 times per night, and seems to be fully awake, I do not interfere until he cries. What do I do when this happens? Am I meant to shush/pat and not pick him up? And for how long?

3. His awake time is for 2 hours, is this ok for a 5 month old? The trouble with his naps being so short though is that he is on a three hour schedule.

I am lost, and really trying to sort through this information. Any help or links would be great. I am feeling pretty guilty about the week of crying, and really want to bring peace tphis little life quickly.

Thanks in advance,
Elizabeth

elizabethmacdougall@gmail.com

[Lana]

Hey there welcome to the boards 

[Pens Fan]

Hi,  I am by all means not an expert as I am a first time Mum and my LO is now 10 months old...   

I would recommend that you stick to one book and whatever you try stick to it for 7 days as its needs time to work and become a routine.

By the sounds of things you need to get your little one to transition over to the 4 hour EASY schedule.  At this age they should be able to go 4 hours between milk feeds/solids- I think this may sort out the day time short naps and also the waking at night as I don't think he is sleeping enough in the day.

In answer to your questions:

1. transition to 4 hour easy- ensure that when BF he is not snacking and having a full feed.  Offer solids then Milk feed three times a day and then Milk at bedtime.

2. At 5 months he is capable of sleeping through the night from 7- 7... yes use shush, shush, pat , pat... it can take from 5 mins to 50 mins to get them off when you first introduce it but it does get easier after around 5 days...Is he waking at the same time every night?  Do you feed him?  I would only pick him up if he gets really upset.  You need to keep doing it until he drops off to sleep...  the key is patience and consistency.

3. at 5 months 2 hours awake time is super but he does need to sleep longer than 1 hour to try and extend to a 4 hour EASY routine.  To extend naps try wake to sleep or Shush, shush pat pat to increase from 1 hour to longer.


At five months our routine looked like this:

1. Wake at 7am- BF
2. Nap at 9am for 1.5- 2 hours
3  11 am BF
4 1pm Nap for 1.5 - 2 hours
5. 3 BF
6. 5 pm cat nap 30 mins
7. 6pm bath, baby massage
8. 7pm BF

We did not introduce solids until nearly 6 months.- at this age Milk is certainly the most important factor and I would suggest that you offer milk after every solid feed too...

When we did introduce solids we did the following:

1. Wake at 7am- BF
2. Breakfast 8.15- 8.30
3. Nap at 9am for 1.5- 2 hours
4. 11 am BF
5. Noon lunch
6 1pm Nap for 1.5 - 2 hours
7. 3 BF
8. 5 pm dinner
7. 6pm bath, baby massage
8. 7pm BF

What we found is that by 7.5 months she has dropped her 11 am feed and by 9 months dropped her 3pm feed...  At 10 months she is still on a four hour routine and all that hard work, patience and consistency did pay off.

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Welcome Elizabeth! Some great advice from eedgar, but there are a couple of clarifications I'd like to make:

- milk is definitely the most important part of his diet so offer it FIRST before solids, NOT after -very important.  You don't want him filling up on solids and not getting enough milk.  At this age, he's likely having 4 breastfeeds per day, at the start of his EASY cycle (after naps) and these might not coincide with "breakfast, lunch and supper".  Solids are just for practice, really.  I would caution not to give too much solids this early on - current guidelines recommend waiting until 6 months to start solids for a breastfed baby.  If you're giving him 3 meals a day, he might not be getting enough milk.  And the milk will actually fill him up longer (more fat and protein - slower to digest), helping him sleep better.  What are you giving him?

- many babies might be capable of sleeping through the night at 5 months, but not all.  Especially not all breastfed babies - many wake once through the first year. Don't stress it if this is the case with him...

- The main problem right now seems to be extending his naps, and then other things may fall into place.  I'm going to bump this to the EASY board for help with the scheduling, but check the sleep board for it's frequently asked questions - you might get some good ideas about extending the naps.  I'll check in if you have more breastfeeding-related questions though.  Good luck!

[* Paula *]

You have been given some great advice so far.

I have to agree with Erin though, at this age milk is by far the most important part of your lo's diet and this should be given first before any solid foods.  At such age, the solid foods are just tasters to get them used to different tastes and texutres.

What solid foods are you giving your lo - it could be that something is not agreeing with him and causing tummy pains / gas and this could also be the reason for unsettled nights / nap times.  Have you noticed if your lo is constipated at all?

Could you post your current routine with E (BF and solids), A, wind down time and S -how long so that we can take a look at it.

[elizmac]

thanks for all the advice so far. I am writting my routine today and will  post once I have it.

Thanks again - Elizabeth