Dropping night feeds

[Oscars Mummy]

Hi,
My DS is seven monhs old and sleeps ok during the day (we have a good routine and he takes naps, bedtime is consistent at seven thirty etc) he was on the four hour easy but since re-reading a bit of the baby whisperer I've trying to 'tank him up' whenever he lets me now he's on the move all the time. THe problem is the night wakings, every hour and he needs to nurse back to sleep even though he can pop himself off to sleep (more oftern than not) during the day and initially at bed time. So we decided to drop the night feeds until 3 am (( as in the B.W) My husband is through there with him now, the thing is he is just SO upset he's been screaming for a good half hour now, the poor little guys voice is all horse (DS not DH!) What should I expect? How long will it take?
I think it would be more bearable if I knew it was normal and we were on the right track but all the other options (like Elizabeth Pantley's) just keep popping into my head.
Any advice or encouragement would be great............One thing is that Tracey says to go through with your plan and the other woman (no cry sleep solution) says to give up for the night if its getting too much.
Thanks

[Colin Macs Mom]

Being consistent is crucial. If you aren't, LO will never know what is supposed to be happening. You need to decide how you want to handle things and stick to it - as Tracy said, "start as you mean to go on." It sounds like he's not one for cold turkey, so I would suggest that you wean the night feeds. Since you're BFing you can offer less minutes every few days until you're at zero.

[Oscars Mummy]

Ohmg! Thanks so much for replying! He seems to be winding down now, just through exhaustion. So should I be consistent with this plan now I'm on it (now we're all on it) or drop it and try and cut down the BF's. The thing is he barely takes any milk at night till the three am feed(which is why I thought to leave that one in)he settles as soon as the boob hits his mouth and just does that sweet little fluttery suck it's only if I doze off and the boob falls out or he is denied it like now that he gets upset, it really is a prop I've fallen in to using. We decided my husband would comfort and PU/PD so e didn't smell the milk but he is just so upset right now it feel almost as bad as if we had just let him cry it out on his own.............thanks again so much for replying you guys really are such an amazing help and support!

[Colin Macs Mom]

Oh sweetie, you're doing great. I know it's hard, my DS was a horrible sleeper for longer than I care to admit.    The question now is, do you feel more comfortable and can you commit to staying on the path now of cold turkey? Or would you feel better about weaning? Both involve time. You obviously know that the sucking is not for eating purposes and it's a prop.

You're absolutely doing the right thing by having your DH comfort and do the PU/PD because if it was you to do that it would be even worse since you're the one with boobs and he knows it.      You DS will be upset, since he's used to sucking to sleep and doesn't understand why you aren't there to offer him that. The PU/PD will teach him that things will be different now and he needs to go to sleep on his own. It's WAAAYYYYY better than if you let him cry on his own, trust me. This way you are with him and he knows that he is supported.

[Oscars Mummy]

Thanks so much, our poor little soul has given up and is sleeping peacefully for the time bieng! You've been such a comfort- if you think we're on the right path we will keep plugging away and give the little guy extra good times during the day to make up for his slack parents getting into acidental parenting habits at night

[Colin Macs Mom]

You're doing great, really! And way back when I was the QUEEN of AP so I can totally relate. It's all so hard sometimes!

[Sharon P]

HI,

Just thought I'd add my support.

We gave up the night feeds about a month ago now and things are much improved. Actually feeds between df and 6am.

DH was the trick, he did our version of shh/pat and it took a while the first night, but we got there.

Over the following few days he ate more during the day and things got easier at night. If he is taking solids I added yoghart and brown rice in his evening meal and I think it helped.

A couple of nights i had to feed him, but generally not. Now I don't even consider it.  I didn't step into the settling roll until we were sure he was no longer hungry. He certainly did bang it on with me when I did take over the settling, but got the message and we now have 70% df-6am sleep through.

Hang in there, it is worth the heart ache.

Sharon.