Author Topic: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby  (Read 1007 times)

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Offline dubgrrl

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Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« on: February 20, 2007, 11:37:01 am »
Hello Ladies

My little  girl was born on the 6th aug and has always been harder work than my 3 yr old boy. She pretty much cried constantly for the first few weeks and now, has seriously strong views about what she likes and doesnt like.

The main thing she does like is BOOB! Because she is hungry, upset, tired, you name it, she wants it all the time. She is also very attatched to me and will sit pretty happily on my knee or play as long as she can see me. With her dad and anyone else however she is completely different. Sometimes she wont even let my husband feed her solid food if i am in the room but will let me do it instead. I suppose we have got into a bit of a rut of letting her get away with this for an easy life, while my husband looks after our three year old.

She wont have a dummy or a bottle either but she will cup feed if forced.

The main problem is her night time waking, things are really coming to a head and I am shattered. I also a bit narked about my husband and his lack of help with this but i suppose thats another story! He picked her up last night and rocked her saying "i cant feed you indi sorry"...she'd only been asleep a couple of hours so isnt hungry, its like he's assisting in her behaviour and making me feel i have to feed her to make her sleep. i know we're all just desparate for some sleep and its easy just to do it to keep her quiet but we cant go on like this. 

Ive brought the gina ford book and the baby whisperer one (if anyone is interested i think she is a "spirited" baby) but i dont feel either really address what i need to do when her habits are so ingrained - or maybe i just feel overwhelmed and need an idiots guide! i just dont know what to do. She doesnt really have a fixed bedtime routine so i suppose thats a start. My little lad goes at 7 so i could bath her then, feed her, get her dressed maybe and then bed...so she wouldnt be feeding to sleep. That all makes sense I know but what then?

Last night when she woke up I tried leaving her for a bit and the crying just got louder and louder to the point of actual screaming rather than just crying. I then tried putting my hand on her belly to comfort her but she just got worse. I dont know how long it was, maybe a few minutes but it was awful. in the end she was back in our bed and husband was on the sofa. when she is in bed with me she snuggles up and feeds every few hours. When she was younger she was better and only waking once for a feed so i am so sad that it has just got worse and worse.

I really dont know what to do to settle her, the only thing that works is boob or at a push, rocking. She is so persistant i really dont know how she (or our neighbours for that matter!) will react or how to do it. i also feel sad for her as she's only doing what we have taught her and its all our fault.

I hope some of you can help, I need an idiots guide!!

Thank you so much in advance.

x

Offline dubgrrl

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Re: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« Reply #1 on: February 20, 2007, 11:42:47 am »
Other Info Needed:
How old is your child? 6.5mnths
What’s his/her daily routine? Nothing really! She usually has a couple of hours after lunch and a small nap in morning & afternoon but has to be fed to sleep and often wakes up still tired & cries and cries until fed to sleep again
What’s nap routine? see above
How long are naps? short & disturbed, she seems a very light sleeper
What's bedtime routine? Time? id like to start getting her ready at 7pm and in bed by 8. now she goes around 9.30
Do you bottle or breastfed?? breastfeed
How much? or how long?  she feeds so often and for not very long atall, im sure its often just for comfort
If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed) one side
How many wakes per night? it was just one but now its every couple of hours
What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up? screams and screams until bf back to sleep but will then go to sleep quite quickly
When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry? starts fussing, progresses to a cry and if left any longer, full out screaming
What have you tried to settle?? leaving her to see if she will herself, dummies which she wont take, rocking, rubbing her belly & breastfeeding
What do you do for A time and how long is it? various activities throughout the day but i would say we're not really in any routine
Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones? she is rolling a lot more and sitting supported
Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? (for LO’s under 6 months)
Do they have a prop? If so what is it? no, except my boobs!
Do they have a lovie? no
« Last Edit: February 20, 2007, 11:45:06 am by dubgrrl »

Offline momofclaire

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Re: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« Reply #2 on: February 20, 2007, 18:11:31 pm »
My my you do have a lot going on don't you.  I am sorry to hear you and your lo are having such a rough time. I think you know that you have to stop bf her to sleep. This will not help her become a better sleeper. 

I think the best thing to do is tackle one thing at a time.  It seems your problems are not having a sch, bad naps, bf/sleep association.  Does that sound about right.  I would pick one and start with that. There is no sense trying to takely them all at once!  I think getting your lo on a better sch will help you see better what is going on.  Have you read Tracy's book?  I would recommend reading it if you haven't and then trying to get you lo on easy. 
You will find a wealth of information and help on this site.  Welcome.
I hope that helps.
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Offline dubgrrl

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Re: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« Reply #3 on: February 20, 2007, 19:27:29 pm »
inhave read the book - all in one day and stupidly expected everything to fall into place. we're going through a lot of stress ately - trying to find a new bigger house (indi is still in our room) and my husband works nights.
on a more positive note i just bathed, massaged and got her ready for bed, fed her until drowsy  but not asleep and then put her in the cot awake. she did a little cry but just rolled over and went to sleep.
im usure what to do when she wakes in the night? i will feed her when i go to bed around 10pm but after that im sure she can last until 5am at least as she did before. do you think the pu/pd method will help at her age? also, she really really screams & gets in such a state i feel unsure if this will calm her down.

Offline M and N's Mom

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Re: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« Reply #4 on: February 20, 2007, 20:05:29 pm »
Take a minute and read this thread.  Springbaby's LO is older, but she was facing many of the same problems.  Last I heard they are doing quite well so it may offer you some inspiration.

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=82413.0


Offline Colin Macs Mom

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Re: Newbie Sleep Help Please!-6mnth bf baby
« Reply #5 on: February 20, 2007, 21:11:12 pm »
I agree with momofclaire, working on one thing at a time is important. LOs don't do well with a lot of change all at once since they don't understand what's happening. I think the best place for you to start would be to get onto a 4 hour EASY routine and solidly establish it. That will help with the night wakings, naps and the feeding to sleep. Then, if problems remain it will be much easier to identify them and work it out.

When she wakes at night, I would not recommend going to PU/PD yet. That technique is meant as a last resort. You want to soothe her in the crib and not feed back to sleep. A pat/shhh sort of thing ought to help a lot.
Jessica
Mom to Colin Ronald, August 18, 2005
Spirited + Reflux =  :o