When do we just let them cry it out? Sleeping 1 hour at night!

[sandraorion]

Hey Tara,

One thought that popped my mind while reading your post was a silent reflux. You said that feeding her is a struggle and that she cries went laid down to sleep and won't sleep long stretches. Maybe it's worth mentioning it to your pediatrician to at least rule it out as a possibility.

Hope you both get more sleep.

[malialeanne]

Hi! My lo's mantra cry sometimes goes on for up to 10 mins off and on--eyes closed, no tears. That is rare, though. It's usually just a minute or two, and most often we have no crying at all. It's kind of more of a moan than a cry. I saw on this site that if the cry escalates, it's not a mantra and they need you.

[tara72]

okay, thanks for the clarification on a mantra cry. I'll keep that in mind!

I'll have to look into silent reflux. thank you for that suggestion. the last couple of days she has been extremely hard to feed and her diapers haven't been wet enough. I wonder if silent reflux can be caused by the formula concentration increase that I (stupidly) did three days ago?

MelBen, I'm sorry to hear you are in a similar boat! but it does help to know that I'm not alone. let's hope that both of our situations get better! let us know how it goes, please? I hope you are successful with pat-shush!

 --tara

[momofclaire]

Tara- I would say even if you can get on a 2.5 easy to start and then once that is est stretch it to 3.  Someone made a statement about a growth spurt.  There is a lot that goes on developmentally in that 3-4 months.  It was a rough time for me.
I would have a look at the EASY board.  There is a ton of info in the FAQ section.  Since that feeding to sleep thing is new I would get rid of it before it becomes real trouble.  Good luck and keep us posted. 

It will get better. It is always something but you are doing a good job and it will get better.

[Layla]

Tara, agree with Myia - start with 2.5easy and then work your way up. I don't think you should topping her up though, it sounds like she is getting enough from the BF (since you mentioned she is not really interested in it). Maybe instead of top up formula, you could express some milk and give her top up EBM (might not seem ideal considering you are up at night & having hard time getting her to sleep). Its just that formula can be difficult on some babies and I do think that upping up the concentration of the formula would have caused her discomfort. I was told to put rice cereal into Isabella's feeds when she wasn't sleeping all night (around 3 months as well) & I did! She was extremely constipated and I felt really really st*pid that I even listened to this person and cause discomfort to my lo. Believe me, when you are so sleep deprived you will want to try just about anything to get them sleeping.

About EASY - it doesn't always fit into the "ideal". My lo was not on true EASY until the 45-min naps stopped, which was somewhere around 5 months. Honestly, you can only do so much when they are taking 45 mins naps. I did what Jazmyn did - if she was awake before her next E, then I gave her some A time and watch for tired signs. If she showed tired signs around the time she was ready for a feed, then feed her and put to bed. As long as she doesn't fall asleep at the breast or bottle, its ok.

I would definitely not cut naps before bedtime - or have her awake for long time before bedtime. Try not to have her awake any more than 1 1/2 hrs (which is the ideal for her age) but if she has only taken a 45min nap and you haven't been able to extend it, then don't keep her awake for the full A time. The last A time is generally shorter as well so by cutting out the last nap and keeping her awake for a long time will cause even more disturbed sleep.

I know how hard all this is for you, dd2 was a terrible sleeper. Up all night and had really inconsistent naps during the day. Sometimes 45mins, sometimes 2hrs. Take heart, this will pass and it will get easier.

Take care of youself
Layla