Daycare sleep is bad...I am at a complete loss what to tell them (long)

[Mom2katiebug]

Rina - I think you've read my other posts about how tough of a sleeper Katie is.  We have good days when I fool myself into thinking that we're getting over this hurdle but it always slips back to the pattern we currently have.  I really have tried very hard - much harder than some others on here and I think this is about the best we can hope for.  I confess all of this to preface my daycare comments...

When Katie was in the infant room, she really didn't nap at all.  She crashed when she ABSOLUTELY needed sleep, but would wake after 20, 30, 40 minutes.  As she got closer to 1YO, she would only get 40 minutes a day and that would be around 10 or 11am.  Sometimes she would still take a catnap on the way home but most days not.  Things improved when she got to the 1YO room but she is always the last to lay down and fall asleep for a nap. In fact, they just lay out her mat and blanket and she still plays until SHE'S ready to lay down - nevermind that all the other kids have been snoozing for 30 minutes already.  And she's the second one awake (sometimes first) but once she hears another friend up and playing, she's back to full steam ahead.  Why nap? She might miss something!  Sometimes she still only gets 60-75 minutes of nap, but it's usually more like 90 minutes.  But the room must be dark and all the other kids have to be laying down or sleeping before she'll even consider it.  They did tell me that just this week she's been laying down with the other kids and going to sleep at the same time (versus playing for a bit) but we'll see if it's a pattern.  It's actually created some problems with nighttime sleep cuz the other day when she did this, she slept 3 hours at daycare! (they'd played outside for a really long time that day).  Her body was expecting the usual bedtime, but we pushed it back about 30 minutes, but she still had a tough time going off to sleep and was up about every 1-2 hours. 

Am not sure if this is the same for Zara, but Katie won't sleep unless she's sure she won't miss something.  If she thinks we're awake, she wants to be up with us.  I'm just wondering if Zara is the same way with her daycare friends? 

Am so sorry that Zara is struggling with this.  I know just how frustrating it can be and how helpless you probably feel when you look at her and she's just dead tired and you just think, "sleep, sweetie, sleep!"  I've done this thousands of times.

Big hugs!   

[rinajack]

They play a lyllabyes CD in the room whenever there is a child in there sleeping.  And I think I am doing the best I can to manager her when she is home, I have always watched cues not the clock, an am pretty flexible about what that means our days look like - I also have no problem with letting her sleep a tonne to catch up - the older she is getting the more quickly she does this, so it is usually not more than a day.

Yesterday she took 2 naps, 25 mins around 11:30/12, then another nap around 3:45.  The second one took them AGES to put her to sleep, with lots of real crying from Zara (they dont' leave her though), so the only reason they could manage it was because NONE of the other kids were in the sleep room.  Then she slept until I woke her at 4:50.  The reason she slept so long was NOONE, not even an adult, went in that room.  I was there, I went to pick her up early, and I sat waiting outside the room.  Also. all the kids, and mostly the adults, were outside, not near the room at all.  But then I did have to push bedtime out to 8pm

And last night, she did not do the dreaded 4am wakeup where we have to help her resettle. That 4am thing I am finding really hard with work and pregnancy.

I think Zara is much like Katie - she won't sleep for them until she is absolutley exhausted. I think she also doesn't want to miss anything, but that makes it sound like she is right into all the action LOL.  She is an observer - mostly she interacts with the other kids only when the groups are small, like only 2-3 other kids.  But she watches EVERYTHING! Nothing gets by her.  I am pleased that things improved for Katie, that does give me a little hope, as does knowing I will be on mat leave soon in a few months, so no more daycare sleep.