HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 15 month old DS is having night wakings

[TJ & Stephy's Mommy]

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm in desparate need of advice.  My 15 month old DS has on and off slept through the night since he was 6 months old but lately he's been having night wakings and it's driving me insane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    I'm going to breakout crying soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  The times he wakes up are not at the same time so I know it's not habitual and sometimes when he wakes up he's wide awake and wanting to play.  He's also woken up after 2 hours of sleep at night.  He usually goes to bed around 7:30pm and wakes up about 7am.  He's not sick and he's not teething either.  I've tried letting DS crying for about 5 minutes and hoping he would go back to sleep but he will stand on his bed screaming and then when I walk into the room, he will stop crying (well sometimes).  I've tried rocking him back to sleep and that doesn't work as he will wake up the minute I try to put him in his crib.  I've tried feeding him but he's not hungry and refuses the bottle.  I've tried w/i & w/o and that makes him cry more when I w/o.  And pat/shh doesn't work anymore as DS is too old for that.  So I'm hanging on a string with my insanity and lack of sleep.  Right now, DS is content to be with DH watching tv and it's 11:45pm and he's wide awake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  What is could be causing the night wakings?  What else can I do?

TIA

[Layla]

Hi Mel.
{{{{HUGS}}}}, this must be really hard on you.

The very first thing I would do is cut out all of the AP that might be going on. No rocking, no bottle and pleeeease definitely no coming out of the cot to watch TV with daddy at 11:45pm. He might seem wide awake and be ready to start the day in the middle of the night but this is all due to chronic overtiredness. The hormone cortisol (which acts much like adrenaline) is released when they are overtired. So he may seem wide awake and alert but is really overtired and too wired up to sleep.

Once you put him to bed for the night, he is to stay in the cot until the next morning. I would pick a sleep traning method and stick to it. Consistency is the key and he moght very well cry because he is used to just being taken out of the room.
He's too old for shh/pat. I would do wi/wo or pd. You can also try GW but if he is there playing while you are in the room, leave and try one of the other methods.

We all wake up at night - its part of the sleep cycle but the trouble here is that he is used to some sort of attention from you in the middle of the night. He's also extremely overtired so I would bring his bedtime forward until this is sorted out.

Does he have a nap, what time & how long?

Layla

[TJ & Stephy's Mommy]

DS has been taking only 1 nap per day but that also depends on what time he wakes up.  If he wakes up at 6am then he will have 2 naps but if he wakes up at his usual time at 7-730am then he's pretty much only going to do 1 nap.  He was in the past sleeping from 7:30pm to 7:30am and may have one night waking but now it's all over place...maybe one, two or sometimes three but at all different times.  I will try the wi/wo again as this did work in the past and getting him into bed earlier.

Thanks for the suggestions.

Mel
BTW, what is GW?

[Layla]

Sorry GW is Gradual Withdrawal.

When he is on 2 naps what times and how long? Try to have him taking a short morning nap and a long afternoon nap (since the afternoon nap is the most rejuvenating).

[TJ & Stephy's Mommy]

If DS takes 2 naps, usually it's around 11:30am to 12:30pm.  The second nap is usually around 3:30pm to 4:30pm.  If DS only takes 1 nap then it is usually around 1:00pm to 3:00 pm or from 2:00pm to 4:00pm.  I don' tknow how he is able to stay awake for so long but he does. 
For last 2 days I have tried getting him to take a short morning nap and a longer afternoon nap and so far he's willing to do it with a little resistance.  But he still has night wakings.  I guess I'll have to keep trying this for a couple of weeks to see if there are any changes.

[Layla]

This is the schedule I would aim for if he is on 1 nap:

7am - wake for the day
12.30pm - nap (2hrs)
7ish - bedtime

I would definitely bring the nap time forward. Isabella can only now do 6 hrs fairly comfortably but there is no way she would have been able to do that at 15 months. Persist with the earlier nap time - him waking up at night is from overtiredness and even if he's taking a good nap during the day, the timing of the nap is also important.

I actually think he might be ready for 1 nap. Even if he wakes at 6 in the morning, have him take a nap no later than 12pm (aim at 11.30/45) and put to bed a little earlier. I think him taking a nap so late in the afternoon is also affecting his night sleep.

See how you go with 1 nap and let me know if his night sleep is any better
Layla

[TJ & Stephy's Mommy]

Layla,
Thanks for the suggestions.  I think right now, DS is sleeping a bit better with 2 naps, but I can tell he's still trying to keep it to 1.  I may gradually go back to 1 nap in a couple of weeks.  Right now, DS will resist a little to lie down around 11am for about 1 hour and will take a longer nap around 2:30 for about 1.5 hours.

When I do move to the 1 nap, should I be giving DS a snack or lunch before the nap?
TIA
Mel

[Layla]

It depends.... we do 1/2 before nap and & 1/2 after sometimes. Sometimes she won't eat lunch until she wakes. Try lunch around 11.30 to give him some time to digest and possible do a poo & then aim for nap around 12.30pm.

But I would keep limiting the morning nap cause if the pm nap is too close to bedtime that can have an effect on night sleep.

Let me know how everything goes
Layla

[TJ & Stephy's Mommy]

Well so far it seems that if DS has 1 nap per day, he will wake up about 1-2 times a night or wake up super early (ie 4am) and will not go back to sleep until almost 2 hours later.  If I try to get DS to take 2 naps per day, one short nap in the morning (about 1 hour) and one longer nap (1.5-2 hours) in the afternoon, DS sleeps alot better at night.  However DS has been waking up about 6am (which is too early for me). DS use to wake up about 7:30am.  I'm trying to adjust to the earlier wake up time but I'm not sure what time to put LO down for his 1st nap in the morning.  Looking for tiredness ques have been hard so I've been trying to put DS down around 10-10:30am.  What times would you recommend for naps if we're doing 2 naps per day?  How long should the "A" time for a 15 month old?

TIA

[Layla]

Isabella at 15 months used to do:

6am - wake up
9am - nap (but I had to wake her up at 30mins or she wouldn't take a good pm nap)
1pm - nap (let her sleep as long as she wanted. Av 1.5hrs)
6pm - bed

She always had a short A time in the morning. I think the av is 3-3.5hrs in the morning and then 3.5-4hrs in the afternoon & before bedtime.

It was around 15-16months that she transitioned, in which case we did
6am - wake
11.30 - nap (1.5-2hrs)
6pm - bed