am i going in too quick?

[mella]

Last night it took about half an hour to get LO to sleep, although he normally goes to sleep within a minute of being put down. He really started crying and nothing was calming him down. By the end, he was doing this strange cry, like he was shouting "eye-eye-eye" over and over. Is this the mantra cry? and should i just leave him when he gets to this point. As i couldn't calm him , i stepped out of the room to calm myself down, and within a minute he had gotten himself to sleep He started waking at about 10pm,and i think we (meaning me) were up about 10 times in the night. But, I've been thinking - am i going in to him too quickly? We go in when he is sort of shouting / whinging, but not actually crying (unless he's hungry and then he crys). Should we leave him until he actually starts to really cry? We have been going in so quick as (quite selfishly) it takes a lot less time to get him back to sleep if we catch it at the beginning.

[M and N's Mom]

If you think it is a real cry, you need to go.  If not, leave him be to put himself back to sleep.  It is hard to listen to but it is all part of him learning independent sleep.  Don't let him CIO, but fussing/mantra is their way of trying to settle themselves IMO.

When you do go in, what to you do to settle him?  Is he prop-dependent and maybe that's why he is waking?

[Sylvia.]

hi, hugs, you ds is so cute, hard not to rescue, i never ever let my dd's cry more than 10 minutes at any one time, i always always stood outside their door, i timed everything to the second, with both my girls they cried to start, listen for the pauses, if you hear pauses this is good, this is them settlingm, i always started the watch again from a pause, when i went in i just did the resettling routine again, everyone has a different kinda one, i believe the cry at the beginning most time is the marta cry, at first it is loud and strong, do what your heart tells you, to me i always said crying more than 10 minutes is cio, it wasn't until i did this with dd2 that things improved and improved quickly, before that i jumped in far to soon, if it normally takes one  minute you are doing well, if last night it took 30 mintues it might just have been a one of, what was different about yesterday? i always always found if dd2 went down hard she woke constently during the night, i could wage a bet on it, here for you, sylvia

[Sylvia.]

oh how old is ds and what is your routine, is he reaching any mile stones?

[mella]

He's 5 months. Milestones..i think a tooth has started to pop the skin, does that count? Yesterday, he had longer naps than normal, thats the only difference, but looked rubbing his eyes 15 Min's before he was in bed. He has just got out of the bath, and i got him down as quick as i possibly could. I normally go in within 30 secs of the crying, actually its more like 10. Normally a quick replug of the dummy is all thats needed, but lastnight he didn't want it some of the time. I left him again today when he woke in middle of a nap and he whinged for a couple of Min's and went back to sleep himself. I think i need to put up with the crying at night for a few Min's, and at least give him chance to do it himself.

[M and N's Mom]

IMO you have given 2 possible reasons for the wakings in your response.  Firstly, the teething could definitely be causing wakings, and secondly, if a quick replug usually does it, he may be paci dependent and therefore wakes looking for it.  Have you considered weaning it?

[mella]

did consider weaning dummy but until we have found out if is silent reflux its staying. Plus last night he really didn't want it back. Not sure on the teeethig thing either, as the wakings havn't just started, he's never really done anything else.I'm just thinking if he can get himself back to sleep in the day, suerly he can do it at night.....

[mella]

Sorry for all the typo's. Think its a lack of sleep thing.... and the routine, its a work in progress, but were aiming for...
7am wakes
A 7-8 on our bed
E 8am milk and cereal
A 8-9
S 9-11 (can do this one now!)
E 11 milk and fruit puree with baby rice
A 11-1 (started getting tired about 12.30 today)
S 1-3 (not good at this, will usually only do an hour)
E 3pm milk and some veggies
A 3-5
S 5-5.30/40 catnap
E 6pm (only takes small amount of milk)
6.30 bath, p'js, rest of feed
6.45 bed

[Sylvia.]

my girls never used a dummy so i can't really comment, but here is something i once read and thought was a great idea, in the day teach your ds to find the dummy in the cot, make it into a game, the article actually said to haved a soft basket in the corner of the cot filled with dummies, do you get the idea?

i think your first step is to wean the dummy or teach him to replug himself, the sooner the better before to may bad habits are formed, then teach to self settle

what are your thoughts?

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