3mo, frequent wake up during night

[camwlove]

My 3mo baby boy has been waking up four times during night since birth. Sounds not too bad, but it seems that he sleeps very light in the second half of the night. He always woke up after around three hours (three hours 50 minutes at the most) after bedtime feed, then he will only sleep 2-2.5 hrs after another feed, the problem is for the next one, which will ALWAYS last only 1 hour!! I can't feed him again as I don't think he is hungry at all. The only way to make him sleep is to give him paci, but I got sick of going to his room replugging for him many times.

Last night, I put him to bed at 8:15 pm, then he woke up at 12:05, went back to sleep after feed, woke up again after 2 hr +15 min. sleep at around 2:55 am, fed him again, then ONLY SLEPT ONE HOUR till around 4:30 am (always happened). I didn't feed him, hoping he could calm down and go back to sleep, but ended up giving him paci. He kept dropping it, then around 5:30 am, I fed him again, he slept until 7:00.

At this age, he should be able to sleep 5-6 hours, but his schedule never changed since birth, actually, worse than before (he did not wake up only after 1 hour before). As I could not figure out whether he is really hungry or just out of habit, so I continue feeding him, but not for the 1 hours one. Sometimes when I fed him at around 5:30, I found he was not really hungry, just did not know how to go back to sleep.

I wonder how to stop him waking up after only one hour.

I am breastfeeding him, supplement with formula.

[Layla]

Hi there & welcome!

Could you please tell me what his schedule is like during the day. How does he fall alseep for naps? How many & how long? How often do you feed him during the day?

Layla

[camwlove]

Hi Layla,

I try to be on a 3 hr EASY. However, it is very hard for me to do this as since 10 days ago, he started to take catnap (30 min or 40/45/50 min, almost difficult to resettle).Yesterday, his schedule is like this:

E: 7:00 am
A:
S: 8:30 am(only slept 30 minutes)

A:
E: 10:00 am
S:10:40 am (40 min. initially, then another 40 min by offering paci,)

A:
E: 13:00
A:
S: 14:00 (40 min. initially, extended 1 hr by offering paci.)

E: 16:00
A:
s: 17:50-18:20 (catnap, screaming to sleep, this one is the most difficult one)

A:
E: 19:00
S: 20:00 (go to sleep very easy)

As you can see, as his sleep is just catnap, there is another activity time after waking up.

He always fight for the nap. What I normally do is to put him to the crib after I found the clues, on most of the occasions, he will cry for a while, then fall into sleep eventually (I've already got used to it).And sometimes he was good, did not make any complaint.

I found it is almost impossible to resettle him after waking up from 40 minutes without paci, however, paci. did not work all the time. Sometimes, if I found he did not look grumpy after 40 minutes, I just picked him up.

I think he just habitually woke up 1 hr after the second feed during the night, and did not know how to go back to sleep. The thing is I just have no idea how to make him go back to sleep with paci (let him cry out, and eventually he will go back to sleep?)

Any suggestions?

camwlove

[Layla]

The max A time for a 3mo is about 1hr30mins (the morning A time is usually the shortest) so I think the catnap is starting too late & thats why he is fighting it so much.
I would aim for something like this:

E - 7am
A - 7-8am ish
S - 8-10am

E - 10am
A - 10-11.30am
S - 11.30-1pm

E - 1pm
A - 1-2.30pm
S - 2.30-4pm

E - 4pm
A - 4-5pm
S - 5-6pm (although can be as short as 45mins)

bedtime routine
6 ish - bath
7 ish - feed
7:15-7:30ish - bed

10pm - DF

Also if the dummy needs to be replugged for him to get back to sleep, do you think it might be a prop? Are you willing to use shh/pat instead of the dummy to help him re-settle. If he has become dependant on the paci, thats why he doesn't know how to get into the next cycle. You don't let him cry... he's still very small and its not something worth doing. Listen to his cries... if he's mantra crying, he could be trying to settle himself but if its a full blown cry, you need to use shh/pat to settle him. It might take a few weeks (and believe me, he'll cry alot) but its far better than leaving him to cry alone.

[camwlove]

Yes, I used Shh/Pat, but he just kept crying. You are right, if I always give him dummy. to sleep, he will never learn to get back to sleep by himself. I think I am just not patient enough. Like you said, it may take a few weeks...

I will also try what you suggest.

Thanks, Layla.

[Layla]

Good luck! I took the dummy away from Jasmine at 4months because I was also replugging it alot so if you are serious, throw them all away so that you are not tempted. Also I would encourage you to look at the props section. Lots of stories of weaning & you'll find alot of support from those going through the same thing.

Here's the link https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?board=28.0

Also bear in mind that ALOT of babies go through 45mins naps & its purely developmental. But at least if you get rid of the dummy, you won't have to be repluggin it at night. You might not always be able to extend the nap with shh/pat, in which case I would pick him up and go on about my day. It might not be true EASY & by the time his next feed is due, he might also be ready for another nap.... as long as he is not falling asleep by the bottle, I would say this is ok as well. Things will settle into a more of an EASY routine once his naps lengthen, which for us happened at 5months. So don't be discouraged if he's still only taking a short nap. You might also want to try w2s to extend his naps.

Please be patient. Things didn't really settle down for us until 5months or so. The morning nap is the 1st one to develop so it might also be the easiest for you when it comes to extending. The catnap is usually the hardest. Please don't let him cry. There are plenty of mothers going through the same thing as you. Here's another link - its a support thread for 45min nappers... its PAGES long so as you can see, you're not the only one. If you post there, you can get lots of support from others!!! https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=69789.0

Keep me posted
Layla