3 month old - waking up wide awake!

[KECA]

At the beginning of the week my 3 mth old LO was only getting up 1x in the night for a feed around 2:30/3am.  The last 2 nights she has been waking up 3-4 times in the night.  She isn't really crying, just 'sqwuaking' and so I've tried leaving her...but it goes on and on and on.  Last night I let her 'sqwauk' for 45 min before being exhausted and just breast feeding her to sleep (I don't believe she was hungry).  During the 45 min I went in to reassure her (at 20 minutes, 30 minutes and 40 minutes) but she'd smile and almost laugh - wanting to play.  UGH!

Well both days she slept really well during the daytime.  Ex - 8:30-10am, 11:30-1pm, 2:30-5:30! and so I did her bedtime routine and tried to put her down for 7...she cried/fought sleep till I fed her at 8pm.  Then slept till 1am and was wide awake (as described above).

I thought I believed that good naps led to good night time sleep - but that sure didn't happen last night!  She was up again at 5:30 - I was too tired to try to just sooth so went to breast feed her and she fell right asleep so I took her off, she cried a little and went to sleep...then woke up 5 minutes later fussing.  Everytime I go into the room her crying level rises, when I leave, it decreases - but not completely.  She's quiet now so I'm assuming she's asleep - it's 6am...*sigh*

Any thoughts?  I'm not sure how long I should let her "sqwauk" before attending to her and then what to do to put her back to sleep when she seems wide awake and then how to eliminate the wakings in the first place!

I think what I did differently earlier in the week was a power nap around 6:30/7pm and then bedtime around 8:30/9pm - but I thought they were suppose to start going to bed earlier at this age so was trying that since she was always tired around 7pm anyway.


How old is your child?  3 mths
What’s his/her daily routine?  EASY routine, up at 7am
What’s nap routine? naps 1 1/2 hours after being awake
How long are naps? generally 1 to 3 hrs in length, on average they are 1 1/2 hours.
What's bedtime routine? Quiet/relax time with Daddy on the couch watching tv, bath, massage, pjs, drapes closed, white noise machine turned on, song, patting, bed Time?  see note above
Do you bottle or breastfed?? bf, and try to bottle feed last feed of the day (breast milk)
How much? or how long?  the expressed bottle tends to be around 4.5-5 oz and then usually a breast top up, breast feeding tends to be between 15-25 minutes long
If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed)  one side
How many wakes per night?  varies - but last night 2, the night before 4, the night before that 2 and the 3 nights before that 1 (tend to only be hungry one of those wakings - but even that I question sometimes)
What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up?  see intro above
When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry?  I'm not sure what a mantra cry is - but she isn't crying much, more "sqwaking" or fussing a bit, but it'll stop for a few seconds and then start for a few seconds, and off and on - more like little "calls" to Mommy - like a "play with me!"What have you tried to settle?? tried a bit of ptt/shhh, but never seems to work directly in her bassinette and so do the PU/PD which seems to work, but doesn't elimate the waking the next night.
What do you do for A time and how long is it?  Generally 1 hr of A time, play gym, sometimes walks, sit together "talking", carrying her while doing some things around the house - it varies
Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones?   Don't believe so
Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? (for LO’s under 6 months)  No
Do they have a prop? If so what is it?  I've pretty much weaned her off the paci last week and don't offer it at bed time any longer - was finding she'd pop it out and fuss so I'd have to go put it back in...she seems to go down for naps and such without it no problem and even going down in the evening doesn't tend to be a problem
Do they have a lovie? No

[Layla]

Hi there & welcome !

Sleep does beget sleep but too much daytime sleep can cause them to wake up at night happy so I think you need to start limiting the last nap. The av for a 3mo is about 3 naps (1-1.5hrs each) & a catnap (about 30-45mins) 3hr nap is certainly too long & I would say this is whats contributing to the night wakings.

Try to aim for something like this:
7ish - wakes & feed
8:30-10 - morning nap
10 - feed
11:30-1pm - afternoon nap
1pm - feed
2:30-3.30/4pm - late afternoon nap
4pm - feed
5/5:30-5:45/6:15 - catnap
7-7:30 - bedtime

Try & not BF her to sleep. If she's just talking/making noises/whatever... other than really crying, let her be. Some babies wake up to enjoy the sound of their noise (although very frustrating for us) so it can also be developmental.

Still try the sch above & see if that helps

hth
Layla

[KECA]

Thank you for your guidance - I will give that schedule a try!

[KECA]

She seems to have her catnap at her 1st nap of the day, any tips to changing that around?  Do I wake her if she's having a long afternoon nap???...

And would you put in a feeding at around 7pm and then put to bed at 7:30?  Otherwise that is only 4 day time feeds - is that enough at her age?

[MegER]

HI,
I am taking a new mommy class and one of our instructors is a sleep consultant. I was having the same issues as you with my little one (10wks old). This is what she recommended....
Same as the given schedule above, but notice that she is up for the longest period of time at the end of the day - eg - she is up from 10 - 1130 in the morning, and 4-7 in the evening and this may mean she is overtired. SO, what worked for me is putting him to bed at 6ish after a feed. Sounds so early but it worked.... Maybe give this a try....
- feed 4pm
- awake
- catnap 5 or 530 latest - limit to 6pm only
- feed
- start bedtime routine after feed
Hope this helps.

[Layla]

Sorry, yes!!! there is definitely a feed just before bedtime (or bath). I forgot to add that feed in .

I thought her morning nap was long? You would wake her at 1.5hts rather than letting her sleep 2 or even 3hrs.

[MegER]

I think a 2.5 or 3hr nap is too long, unless the night was an awful one! I would do some gentle waking techniques at 1.5hrs into the nap - open lights, turn down music, remove blanket etc.

[KECA]

Thanks so much for you suggestions ladies!  We eliminated the 1am waking last night - still had the 3 (for feed) and the 5 - for who knows what *L* but we'll give it a few days...
I really appreciate your help!

[KECA]

So it isn't working...
Tonight she woke up again at 1:30am... do I feed her then when her usual wake up time is 3/3:30?  I tried this once but it didn't stop her 3:30 waking.
She had a good 6 oz of expressed breast milk before bed......I really can't imagine that she's hungry....but now I second guess myself.
I really want to see her sleep through the night - or at least only get up at the same time every night for a feed.  HOW?
She's waking up and what I think is considered mantra cry and then it builds.

[Layla]

Have you been working on daytime schedule? How long are the naps???

[KECA]

Have you been working on daytime schedule? How long are the naps???

Yes - the daytime schedule pretty much matches the one suggested now.  Sometimes her naps are a little shorter than I'd like, but I think on the whole we're doing well.
I ended up feeding her last night by about 2:30 and she then slept till 7.
I read another member's post after posting last night and realized that maybe my expectations for sleeping through the night are high.  I was under the impression that when others say their LO is sleeping through the night they mean from 7to7 without feeds.  I should be happy with her waking up for only one feed - and may try implementing a dreamfeed.
I just don't understand when she wakes up more than 1x in the night what prevents her from getting back to sleep that night when she was able to the night before.

[momofclaire]

I just wanted to jump in and say that it sounds like you are doing great.  She is still young and sleeping through the night (12 hours) is a lot to expect of a 3 month old.  I think being down to one feed is really good. 
She is still learning how to sleep.  I know sometimes that is hard for us to understand but everything is new to her.  Many things could be keeping her from being able to settle including gas, overtiredness, or just plain curiosity.  Hang in there. It really looks like you are the right track.
Myia

[Layla]

Sleeping through the night has always in my mind been a stretch of 5-6hrs (for someone of that age). If she's only having 1 feed, she's doing exceptionally well!!!