Author Topic: Does this sound plausible? (Read 3101 times)

yaya · « **on:** December 23, 2006, 15:04:36 pm »

We have had serious sleep issues for over 3 months now and after 'sorting out' health issues we are left with every hr wake ups. DS is 14 months old and the only connection i can make with the hideous nightwakings is that the have lasted as long as my pregnancy so far.
Does anyone out there think DS can 'sense' something? and is maybe sufefring some kind of SA? He is also A lot clingyer in the day but I was putting it down to beign overtired.

Would love your thoughts on this.

Quick question while I'm at it?

Is every hr wake up at night common with being overtired? In your experience, what other factors can cause consitent 1 hr wakeups?

TIA

daniellechiasson · « **Reply #1 on:** December 23, 2006, 18:04:15 pm »

Michelle I just wanted to offer some support. We are stuggling here also but I have APed and right now I am not beating myself up for it because I dont have the energy to change it (if that makes sesne). I read a post yesterday, I think it was Cary's mom that wrote something about SA being worse at night because the time they are away from you is longer. Seems to make sense to me. I spent some time thinking about that wondering what could help. Maybe something similar to when breastfeeding moms leave their shirt or something around when others tried to give the bottle, perhaps a piece of clothing in the crib.

How long is he up/napping in the daytime? Are you guys on 1 nap? Yesterday my DH left Gaby have a 3.5 hour nap

and she was up off and on from 10pm to 4am (OMG, I'm wasted).

Also, could he be teething? When Gaby is teething she will wake up screaming out like in pain. It's like she is getting shots of pain, poor thing. Really distrubts her sleep at night and for some reason she will still wake at her normal time needing me to adjust her naps.

Anyway, I know it's not much help but I do feel for you. I can't imagine being pregnant on top of it, ugh.

Hugs, Danielle

mari · « **Reply #2 on:** December 23, 2006, 19:02:50 pm »

I agree with Danielle that it could be down to teething, although when Alex was overtired she used to wake every hour sometimes, sometimes she just woke and was awake for 4 hours and this is the norm with her when she is overtired. What is your routine? I think that I have asked you this in previous threads but can you remind me please.
I do feel for you both, I really went through it twith Alex for the best part of a year. It will get better honestly.
((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))

yaya · « **Reply #3 on:** December 23, 2006, 19:26:17 pm »

thanx so much for the support girls, means a lot. I have considered it as teething as sounds similar to what danielle suggests but has lasted 3 months now

and hes never been like this with teething before.
Yes we are on 1 nap a day, was a bit short but its working its way up , about 2 hrs now, usually a tad less.

Routine is as follows (just posted it on EASY board, think it may get moved

)

wake 7.30- 8ish

Lunch 12.15ish
Nap 12.45-1ish for 2hrs (touch and go more often than not its 1.45 hrs today over 2 hrs)

Dinner 6.30 ish

Bath just after 7 usually, in bed 7.30-7.45 ish usually take sup to 30mins to fall asleep

thanx

mari · « **Reply #4 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:10:24 pm »

Does he settle well for his nap? A longer nap would be nice, so work on that, but his routine does seem good so I can't see why he would be overtired. Have you noticed any other signs that could point to teething? ie red cheeks, sore bum, pulling at his mouth etc?
Sorry I am not much help to you, I hope that we can get to the bottom of this for you.

binxyboo · « **Reply #5 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:11:00 pm »

Riley was an okay teether until he started on the molars. The first one went on for months. Even after it started to break through, it took at least a month to fully surface.

Hugs, sounds like tough going at the moment

Just looked at your routine. I would make the first nap earlier and put him to bed earlier as well. Our day goes like:

7-8: wake
11:15 ish : lunch
12: Fast asleep at this stage for at least two hours
7-8: bed

If I wait until after 12 for his nap, bedtime becomes a nightmare. He also doesn't nap as well as usual.

yaya · « **Reply #6 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:19:46 pm »

He settles well for naps coz I hold him to sleep

this started when he was unwell and he's only just started feeling better. I attempted sleep training for just over a week but saw no improvement and am soo tired I wasnt able to do it for nightwakings, Just for bed and naptime so I realised I wasnt being consistent and gave up- ALso if I sleep train it takes over an hr and I feel that he'll never catch up on sleep as we have such bad nights too. I know, terrible, but can it be sole reason for hellish nights?!

yaya · « **Reply #7 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:29:59 pm »

Hey Stacy, long time no see! How r u!
Thanx for your input and to answer all your Qs quite simply no, no, no . no etc.
He hasnt slept indep since he was unwell. Illness only started clearign up about 2 weeks ago when I hit sleep training again, the nightwakings got worse at this point and he was getting seriously overtired as was taking him hrs to settle and then the bad nights too and things were just escalating. In short, he goes to sleep in my arms. When he wakes I put my hand on his back and wait till he stops wriggling then remove hand and let him go to sleep on his own.

I know I need to tackle the indep sleep but its tough, I'm very, very tiredand TBH we've only ever had short bouts of indep sleep, mainly due to the reflux and he's slept thru 12hrs straight before this.

i've been battling with myself on this one. I know that the 'me' prop is responsible to some extent, but can it be only this? hes 14mo and has previous to illness slept beautifully. I suppose I need a kick up the **** or someone else to do this for me. I really am exhausted and cant face pu/pd or wi/wo for nightwakings.

TIA

yaya · « **Reply #8 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:31:23 pm »

do u think? a few days? I did just over a week unitll a few days ago and not the slightest improvement, in fact it was worse and man was I consistent!

binxyboo · « **Reply #9 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:34:15 pm »

I am sorry you are feeling so tired. I can't imagine being pregnant with a toddler running around, but of course it will be all worth it in the end. If it were me, I would go about trying to change the times of his naps and bedtime first to see if that naturally helps things.

Fife_Mum · « **Reply #10 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:38:33 pm »

Hi,

I don't disagree with what everyone else said about teething & props. First year molars took an age to appear for Fraser even though he had the symptoms (can't keep him dosed up with calpol for 3 months though

). But I think your original thought about extra anxiety because he can sense changes might be true too. Have you spoken to him about expecting a little brother or sister? Now might be the tim eto start talking about it. Unless you are close to other families with young siblings he might not understand but at this age LO's understand so much more than we give them credit for - they just can't talk about it - and you talking about it, even getting a 'baby' doll or whatever might help.

We did not have this issue with DS until my preganancy was a bit further along, but if you are extra tired/emotional/sick then maybe your DS is picking up on some vibes.

Oh, and I'd wait until your 2nd trimester burst of energy kicks in for sleep training - or even better get some help.

yaya · « **Reply #11 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:39:48 pm »

thanx michelle! I have foudn it really hard, first trimester hormones and all that but TBH Ive got used to the sleep deprivation in the day and am in pretty good spirits but just physically dont have the energy to sleep train at night

yaya · « **Reply #12 on:** December 23, 2006, 20:42:48 pm »

thanx vicky! I will def wait for the burst of energy, I physically cant before then!!
Feel much better now than a few wks ago tho!

mari · « **Reply #13 on:** December 23, 2006, 21:10:59 pm »

I hope that you can sort things, I am glad that you are getting loads of good advice and support here. I do think that sleep training could be your answer here. If you think, we all wake through the night, I do, mostly because of my lo's, but I also just wake and look at the clock and realise that it's too early and go back to sleep, because I can, your LO can't do that, he needs you to help him, so, I would suggest altering the times slightly as Michelle (BINX) said and as soon as you are in the right frame of mind go for it on the sleep training. I did loads of sleep training with Alex but I only really cracked it when I was 100 percent determined, I can honestly say that I hadn't been so determined before and gave up too soon, that's what confused her.
Good luck, and I am praying for sleep for Christmas for you.

yaya · « **Reply #14 on:** December 24, 2006, 13:31:54 pm »

Thanx everyone! well last night he woke at 9pm (as usual) but instead of rushing in I left him, in 3mins he found his paci and settled himself. Slept till 1.30 when I had to go in and he was wide awake (think same as me, used to sleeping 1 hr stretches so felt quite rested at this time LOL) then slep till 7 am, so all in all the best night yet. I think not rushing in was the trick.
I hearya all on the deternination, conssitency etc When we did pu/pd for a week I was very consistent but possibly the health issues hadnt been fully resolved then. T is def not ready for wi/wo as going through a 'mummy' stage and finds it real hard to be left alone.

I am honest in saying that im not ready to give it another shot but I think giving him the time to settle rather than rushing in will help in the meanwhile. I was just habit from me, being worried that he was unwell.

After the xmas hols if things are nto better we'll give it another shot.

Thanx everyone for advice and support, invaluable as always

binxyboo · « **Reply #15 on:** December 24, 2006, 15:58:41 pm »

That's great to hear!

yaya · « **Reply #16 on:** December 26, 2006, 12:12:19 pm »

thanx stacy, spesh for being so understanding! I think we are dealign with some serious SA, and this is why sleep training is too hard for me to handle right now. whenever we've done this in the past, my only prob was it took him a very long time to fall asleep but he was always happy to go into his cot. This time he gets upset, and I mean, REALLY upset as soon as I put him down, so I'm patting more thaN anything else (dont pu) but theres no way I can even sit on my chair! this is why I cant see it through, I'm not emotionally strong anough right now. I think I'll have to accept this and let DP do the sleep training, I have never done so before

dont ask!
Its a viscious circle, I know what the prob is but I havent got the strength or courage to go about fixing it the right way, too much crying involved and Im not used to it, DS wasnt ever much of a screamer, now.----hell!

thanx for ur support, means a lot, If it werent for BW I would be only hearing 'oh just let him CIO, worked in my day!'

daniellechiasson · « **Reply #17 on:** December 26, 2006, 12:56:24 pm »

WTG yaya, it's only best to be honest with yourself and most fair to your LO, I learnt this the hard way with Gaby. Mari has told me a few times that it gets better, I'm holding her to it (I'm giving her until Gaby's 2, haha).

Danielle

ps-where do I get off calling your Michelle?!? sorry

yaya · « **Reply #18 on:** December 27, 2006, 10:52:24 am »

U can call me anythign u like hun!! it is Michelle tho

daniellechiasson · « **Reply #19 on:** December 27, 2006, 10:55:27 am »

Wow, this is one for the mommy mush board, sigh!

yaya · « **Reply #20 on:** January 04, 2007, 19:12:15 pm »

OK update: very briefly....still hell. But I have a few Qs if you'll bare with me.
Still not ready to attempt sleep training but i wonder if this is in any way better than our present situation of rocking to sleep.
Past 2 sleeps, T has had his bottle then I have just held him no rocking, swayign, nothing. He has goen to sleep by himself. Will this help in setting me up for sleep training? What I mean is, if previously he needed to be rocked to sleep, surely this is slightly better ?? (please say yes)
Does this mean if he lays still in the same way in his cot he'd be able to fall asleep idnep? My prob is that T just wriggles about for hrs and hrs gettign more and mroe upset when we try sleep trainig as if unable to keep still long enough to go to sleep.

Will this 'new method' in some way teach him this skill (in part) BTW I have been putting him down sleep instead of totally asleep and just holding my hand on his back if he gets resteless.

Please please give me some encouragement

yaya · « **Reply #21 on:** January 05, 2007, 11:05:49 am »

yeah I totally agree, when he was falling asleep indep this is what he did, a marathon in his bed! The prob now is hes not happy doing this, just gets evry frustrated and overtired. Just read some thing sinead suggested about antihestamine makign them restless (T is on antih) and think this may be an issue...thanx stacy ur a star as usual!

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Author Topic: Does this sound plausible? (Read 3101 times)

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