Dear newmama12,
I know exactly what you're going through: we were there a couple of weeks ago. What's happening now is that he wakes only once in the night, takes a whole BF, then is going right back to sleep. Not sure what I can attribute it to, but the changes I've made are:
1. I'm using W2S to extend his naps, which had become only 30 to 45 minutes. W2S is working about 80% of the time, as long as I catch him before he wakes on his own, and is extending naps to about 1.5 hours, sometimes a bit more.
2. After I BF him, which I have to do all the way downstairs in our family room due to logistical reasons, he's not always asleep. I used to do the battle that you're doing. I now sing his bedtime/naptime song to him (same one all the time) on our way up the stairs, I hold him in the rocking chair (but not rocking) for about 4 minutes, then put him down in his crib. Not sure if it's this new way of putting him down that's working, or the better naps, but he'll fidget a bit, sometimes for up to 20 minutes, but no crying. So I hide at the doorway listening, and he drifts off. Some nights within 2 minutes, other nights it takes longer. But there is no screaming or crying.
As I said above, I don't know which thing has made this change, or maybe it's a developmental thing, but our nights have been peaceful ever since. Oh, I almost forgot: I eliminated his dream feed. Miya told me earlier in this thread that for some LOs, it disrupts them rather than helps them. It seems pretty clear to me that this was indeed the case with mine.
HTH... keep in touch. You're not hijacking! THat's what this is all for!
Allison