I thought at night time its great if they sleep straight after a feed?
Yes it is fine for them to go straight to sleep after a feed at night, some people find that LO fallign to sleep during the feed doesn't matter however I'd aim to have the feed finished then LO goes into the cot before falling to sleep if possible.
You might not be aware of your reliance on the feed to sleep prop, or emerging prop. there are a couple of things you have described which led me to think *you* are using the breast or bottle in an attempt to get him to sleep if he doesn't settle.
If i give him a bottle he starts chatting and grinning and then i give him the breast again to try and get him back to sleep
Here perhaps I am mis-reading this but it sounds like he wakes and is hungry, that's fine he needs a night feed, you feed him (bottle or breast) and he is then to go to sleep, however he is not going to sleep so you pick him up again and give him the breast "to try to get him back to sleep". Then again you say when he moves around and complains you "give him the breast again to try and put him back to sleep and this repeats itself for about 4 hours". It reads as a prop or emerging prop.
A prop if often something a parent tries to make LO sleep even when it is not what LO needs or not what would be most helpful to everyone concerned in the long run. If he was hungry he would eat but after he has eaten what he needs is sleep rather than more food. He is not hungry for 4 hrs straight.
Do you see the difference between feeding for hunger (at something like 3hr intervals) and maybe LO falls to sleep right at the end of the feed (or after being put back in the cot) and offering the breast repeatedly through the night to try to make him sleep?
This is what I mean by prop and what I suggest you move away from.
Honestly I think when an 'easy' option is available at night such as BF it must be hard for you to move away from that.
Your DH has more success in putting LO to sleep in his cot using shush/pat because DH has no option, he has no breast to fall back on when he tires so has to keep at it.
Your eASY didn't look so much like you were feedign to sleep in the day, so if that's the case also then you can expect to see a big iprovement in sleep all around once the prop is removed and LO learns to self settle. xx