hey georgia - i only get him up and take him out if it's time for his feed or within a half hour of it. like debra says, i also impose the "well, you can just stay in there then till it's time to get up" rule if he is happy.
but, it's when he's crying that's the thing. the fake one. tonight, he started and it got lengthy, so i decided to just pu/pd when it was genuine. through all the yelling i just stayed with him with my hand on his chest, when he took little breaks, i shushed so he could hear me. after 1.25hrs he fell asleep.
after reading your reply i thought, she is waiting outside the door, and i would be waiting by the monitor, so i may as well be in there trying to help.