4 mo old--early morning waking

[SHP129]

Hi there! I have a 4 mo old (will be 4 months in a couple of days) who just began to take longer makes during the day (yay!) but now he is waking up around 4-4:30am everyday! How do I make him wake around 6am? Here's what we and our son is doing throughout the day (DS follows this schedule very closely on his own but it may fluctuate by 30 mins or so because sometimes he takes a 2 hour nap here and there)::

6-7:15/7:30am-- wake, nurse, play
7:15/7:30-9am-- nap
9-10:30am-- wake, nurse, play
10:30-12:30pm-- nap
12:30-1:45/2pm-- wake, nurse, play
1:45/2-3pm-- nap
3-4:45/5pm-- wake, nurse, play
4:45/5-6pm-- nap
6-7:30-- wake, nurse, play, bedtime routine (bath, read a book)

We used to give DS a dream feed around 10pm and then he would sleep until 6 am. We took that away just to see if he could sleep through the night without the dream feeding, which he was able to do up until recently. Now we have a later start to the day because of the early waking which means later bed time but he's still waking up super early. We also went back to dream feeding him but he is still waking up early.  And I should mention that he is genuinely hungry at this early waking time.

To give you more background, we usually rock DS for 5-10 mins until he gets drowsy and put him in his crib (for all his naps). He will usually fall asleep within a few minutes. He doesn't use a paci, he is almost always and to put himself to sleep at night without rocking  (when we did dream feed or when he woke up in the middle of the night during this sleep regression. He also drinks around 5oz of breast milk.

Am I not keeping DS up long enough in the day that is causing him to sleep less at night? Would it be appropriate to move to 3 naps a day? I still feel like he needs about 6 feedings/day. And most importantly, how do I move up his wake time to 6am?

Thanks in advance for any recommendations or suggestions!!

[deb]

My memory of this time is hazy (mine are much older now!) but it seems to me that 4 months means around a 4-hour EASY, so you can try keeping him up for a longer A time - shoot for closer to two hours if he doesn't get too cranky. Spacing out the feeds means he'll be taking in more each feed, and since his stomach is getting bigger, that makes sense - plus he'll also feed more efficiently, so even if his feed time is shorter, he'll be taking in plenty. Give that a try and then you can always consider re-instituting the DF if he still needs it.

[SHP129]

So he's been doing 3.5-4hrs. I couldn't get him to do 4 hourly. But he is still waking up earlier and earlier in the night no matter what time he goes to sleep. His last feeding in the evening can be anywhere from 6-7:30. Also the inconsistency is driving me crazy, he's waking and eating at all different times throughout the day and each day is different. Any other suggestions? Thank you!!

[creations]

Hi there
it's very normal for the DF to be continued until more like 8 months.  If you don't want to DF that's fine, but LOs will still be expected to have at least 1 if not 2 night feeds.  I would treat the 4.30am wake up as a night feed, just feed right away and get everyone back to sleep as soon as possible.  It looks from your times that he is going back to sleep and waking for the day at around 6am which would be acceptable.  If he isn't going back to sleep then the 4.30 WU is a problem, otherwise I'd just call it a NF.
As Deb has said a 2hr A time is guidance at this age.

[SHP129]

Thanks, I've DF him around 10-10:30 but he is still waking around 4-4:30. I've also tried cry-it-out for 45 mins but then I just got him because he wasn't settling and it was too hard for me. And when I do feed him at 4-4:30 he is up and plays in his crib until 5-5:30 but doesn't really fuss, just cops and ends up falling asleep by himself, just takes a while.

Any other tips??! I'm desperate.

[Katet]

Please don’t try cry it out, if you can’t get them to repeat back to you your explaination on why you are leaving them crying they aren’t old enough to understand why you don’t respond to their crying. It breaks their trust in you and makes sleep more difficult not better.

There is a big growth spurt around 4mo so that could be a factor.

Looking at the times He looks like he’s having 4 naps and only 1 hour 15  to 1.5 hours awake time, I think that is stealing from night sleep, so definitely worth trying to get closer to 2 hours awake time. 3 naps and a 15 min catnap or 3 naps would be the longest you’d want rather than 4 longer naps.

If he gets grizzly at 1.5 hours try a change of scene as boredom can play a part too... I found a walk around the garden bought me 15 mins longer and improved things when I was trying to get longer A time.... esp in the morning as that helps the sleep before dawn.

Also habitual tiredness is a factor which is why they can lstick to habit in time of falling asleep and not extend, so need that help to reach a longer A time (1 h 45 to 2+ hours would be normal at 4 mo)

[creations]

As I said previously, 2 night feeds is absolutely  normal at this age and even up to a year old.  It's advised that you BF on demand day and night and your LO will need that second feed at night even after a DF.  LO might need more than this during a growth spurt.

We do not agree with CIO at BW, as kate had already said i breaks the bond of trust, you need LO to trust in you and you need to respond to a cry.  Here is a link to research on CIO:
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=19710.0

Here is a link about regain trust of your LO, you might feel that these steps, some or all, are suitable for your situation:
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=126141.0

I would also suggest that if you have not read any of the Baby Whisperer books that you do so. It almost doesn't matter which one, perhaps your local library can get a copy in for you. I think you would find it helpful to understand the BW ethos and basic methods.
I think it may also help to read up on some recent BF information with regards to what the guidance is and what is normal for your baby so that you don't feel that your baby is overly demanding or feeding too often.
hope this helps