A few more questions
Does he cry to be fed before going down for naps?
Is he okay going to bed?
Do you have a winddown routine?
Have you got any of the Baby Whisperer books? I would recommend you get the book The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems.
He is waking at exactly 45 minutes, which i now see by the boards that is very common.
my questions are he is awake for 2 hrs inbetween naps, do you think it needs to be longer and thats cause for the short naps?
Put him down right on the 2hr mark in his crib. You will have to stop feeding him before his nap, it will be hard. As you are waiting for him to get fussy and then feeding, he is getting overtired and I think that is why he is having short naps. Do shush/pat or PU/PD (there is a forum dedicated to doing this and how to do it).
When they have not got enough sleep, they will wake crying.
When he does wake at 45 min howv long do i keep trying to get him back to sleep without effecting the rest of his schedule
I afraid keep doing it until next feed time.
also how do igert him to put himself back to sleep?
I think you would have to do shush/pat in the beginning, you make a sssshhing noise close to his ear and pat his back (if he is a tummy or side sleeper) or shoulder or tummy (gently) if he is a back sleep.
The sleep cycle is 40/45 mins long then they come out of the deep sleep and 20 mins later they go into a deep sleep again.
So you want to start on a 3hr EASY.
What you want to do is set up a wake time for him, say like 7am, wake him at this time everyday. This will set his inner clock.
You will want to feed him every 3.5hrs exactly. I am afraid your DS is a snacker. You will want to break the habit. I was going to suggest a 3hr EASY but, he can be awake for 2hrs so I am afraid that it will be a little bit difficult to put him on a 3hr.
You will want to feed at 7am 10.30am, 1pm, 4.30pm and then just before bed, at 7pm.
You will want to put him to bed 2hrs after wake up not any later, and don't feed him. This will be extremely hard, but you have to break this habit, you will be in for a rough few days. You will be in for some short naps to break this habit, once the feeding every 2hrs is over and done with and he is feeding every 3.5hrs then you can work on the sleep.
Do shush/pat or PU/PD (see above).
You can do this, I know you can.
One more thing; he napped fine on this schedule for 1 1/2 at a time in his swing before the crib transition 2 weeks ago.
One thing, that helped me and my DD, is to play in his crib during awake times only for about 10mins every awake time, now my DD looks forward to going to bed and wants to sleep. Try doing this, so he knows it is okay to go into the crib.
Sorry this is so long.
HTH