Separation Anxiety/Getting over Illness - we are one big mess

[KimMackay]

...and just like I thought, he slept a 10 hour night after doing the long nap. 

I'm so confused about how to fix this.  The last few times I've tried an early BT this month it has completely backfired and we got a 4:15/30am WU.  With the 10hr-10h15 nights we're having 14 hour days (yikes)...but this is because of our longer than usual naps, due to our short nights.  We're stuck in a serious loop.

PLEASE HELP. I feel like we're never getting out of this.  I spend every day in his room during his nap because he's constantly waking early due to OT.

[katie80]

Argh, sorry Kim, I haven't gotten back to you, because I'm not quite sure what to say.   It does seem to be a pattern that the longer nap makes for a shorter night, but that is so backwards from every other situation I've been in, because his nights are really short. 

When you do an EBT and get the EW, he just doesn't go back to sleep?  If it's before 5am, G will almost always go back.  The thing is... EBT for you isn't really EBT because he's waking so early.  This happened with Claire after the time change when she was just two.  She was teething 2yr molars and taking around a 1h20nap each day.  But, she was waking at 5:30-6am, so even a 6:30 BT (when it had been 7pm) wasn't early enough because it was still a 13hr day, iyswim.  Are you brave enough to do a super EBT? 

I guess the only other option I can think of would be to pull the nap earlier and see if you can't get him to do a longer one on his own.  Then, at least you would get more Y time.  And if it's still short, any chance you could APOP one later to see if you can't take the edge off OT and get a better night?  I don't know, I'm just throwing out ideas of what I would try I guess.

Anyone else??? 

[Mattsmummy]

Kim, I've been following along and offer you many HUGS...My DS is not a great napper/sleeper either...
Now, I'm just spit balling, but with the state N is in right now, being so massively OT and teething, (and I'm going against all logical thought on this board ) but could you just abandon all ST right now and focus on getting him caught up on his sleep?

If he needs to sleep on you then so be it? ST, IMO, works so much better when they are not so OT. Maybe a CN in the car in the afternoon??? Again, just spit balling...

My DS will not go back to sleep either if he wakes after 4am...makes for a SUPER long day and when this has happened, we've had to have a 5pm bt - no other way around it...
Can you do a BT of 5pm for a few nights? N might just surprise you...

WRT the EBT, it did take my DS about a week to start to sleep in a bit longer. We still have some early mornings - it's all a work in progress...
HOw long have you tried the EBT's?  Did you give it a full week?
Also, have you had him to the DR, just to rule out any other cause that might be bothering him?

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time...I've been there with the 4am WU and they SUCK...

Hopefully someone else will have some better ideas...

[KimMackay]

Teeth and OT really aren't a problem any more. 

Our night has finally lengthened...the last 3 days he has done 10h50-11hr...waking at 5:45am rather than 4:45am...awesome!!!! This has only happened since chopping the nap....night didn't lengthen until nap was no more than 1h20. However....now I'm having A LOT of trouble getting him down for his nap.  It's almost like he was forced into such a long A time with his super early WU's...that now, he won't go down after 6hrs.  He was waking at 4:45/5am and going down for 11:30am.  Now with waking at 5:45am he's fought 11:30am and 11:45am.  I guess today I'm going to try 12pm?  I just finally felt like we had reset his body clock for his nap.....and now all this resistance again.

I just can't seem to win.

[becj86]

Do you think a set nap/set BT will help set his body clock? It has worked really well with DS and now you're saying the OT and teeth aren't such an issue, maybe its something to try?

[KimMackay]

I've been doing set times. Both BT and nap have been set. 

It's only since getting back to a normal WU time that there has been such resistance (other than the crying that he does every day before falling asleep). He was asleep every day by 11:30am.

[*Kara*]

This happened to us too Kim... push his nap out to noon, maybe even 1215pm.  Really, you will get to 1230/1pm generally by 18 months so he is on the right track   The later nap could push his wake up time out too!

[KimMackay]

Kara....you think we should still push it out that much even though he wakes before 6am???

[*Kara*]

I would.  And I have when in this rut.

[KimMackay]

Ugh...I thought we kicked this super early waking.  5:15am today....so only 10h20 night...what the heck?  He NEVER used to do anything less than 10.5hrs.  If he was OT or UT it was 10.5hrs....and otherwise closer to 11hr.

Man...we're so stuck.  Couldn't push until noon today....did 11:45am and he woke 30 min into it (classic OT from him). Slept on me for the rest.

[KimMackay]

Can my little man (and us) not get a break already?!

In the hospital again, hooked up to IV's again, held down and poked with needles again, sedated again   For some unknown reason, N developed a cyst on his face that got an infection.  They had to sedate him to basically cut it out of his face.  What a horrible horrible day.  This poor LO has been through so much this year....my heart was breaking for him.

Hopefully things don't get even more messed up.  Had his nap at the hospital on me today....and it was an hour earlier than normal, so bigger A until BT.  Tomorrow we have to go for a follow up which is going to make his nap end up later than usual. 

Oh...and more advil.  I swear N has practically been medicated for all of November and December

[katie80]

Oh Kim, so many ((((hugs)))) hon. That sounds awful. Do what you can to get through and give him the extra cuddles he needs. Praying you all get a break soon!

[*Kara*]

Oh goodness!  Will be thinking of Rolie Polie Nolie...

Momma cuddles are the best medicine!