Hi and welcome!
he fairly consistently only takes 45 minute naps. I try to gently soothe him back to sleep with shush/pat his crib then with me holding him, but it rarely works in. If he wakes early and I cant get him back to sleep, what do I do with him? Awake time then feed? Feed then sleep routine again and reset the cycle?
Short naps at this age could still be developmental but it could also be that something needs tweaking in his awake time and nap. Would you like to post your day in an EASY format?
I can only tell you how things were for us at this stage. I found extending naps very very difficult. Not only it never worked but it was so draining for me to be in a dark room with a screaming baby, so I actually made peace with the short naps at this stage and our EASY looked like this: EASAEAS so basically you are feeding in the middle of your next A time which is approx. 3h from your last feed (could well may be less than that). If there is any AP that works for you to extend naps or to get him to nap longer don't be concerned to use it now, but only use AP that you are happy with (obviously you weren't happy with him sleeping on you or bouncing him, which is understandable). For us it was the pram. I knew that whenever I pop him in there I'll get a 1.5-2h nap so I did it. He was (like your LO) too young for sleep training, really. Spacing feeding from sleeping is already a huge accomplishment at this age!
do I have to pat or can I rub/tickle his head. Is there something particular about patting or can I implement anything that seems to soothe him.
You can adjust pat/shh to whatever works for him and you.
after he gets up, I feed him (20-30 minutes), then change and within 5 minutes he’s yawing so I take him to his room and start the naptime routine. He soon becomes frustrated and begins to cry. It often takes 30 minutes to get him to calm down and fall asleep, am I putting him down too early/late?
I would need to see your day to answer that. Basically it COULD be either OT or UT but it can also be because he is just learning how to fall asleep on his own. I mean, it's just three days since you changed things and he got used to something very different in the last 6 weeks. He probably needs time.
He hates being swaddled!! He screams bloody murder! He likes to sleep with his hands near his head. Should I try to swaddle anyway?
That's a tough one. I don't want to tell you yes, swaddle anyway, because maybe he REALLY doesn't like it, but my experience was and I read many mommies here have the same experience is that at first LO hates it and it takes a couple of days for them to get used it and then they can't go through sleep cycles without it, lol!
It often takes him 30 minutes to get him to consistently calm down with the 4S’s with him crying off and on the whole time. Does it normally take that long? He tends to fight sleep while im holding him, then he crashes and I feel like I miss my sleepy/drowsy window to put him in his crib while he’s still awake….any ideas of why he fights so much…OT? UT?
Like I said before, it could be both and it can also be that he is resisting the new "program" mommy started.
When we gets off track and gets OT should I do whatever to help him get some sleep (he will sleep 2+ hours if I let him sleep on me) so he can “catch up” or should I keep putting him in his crib even if he only sleeps for 45 minutes?
I would at this age. Perhaps I would try with the first couple of naps but then by midday if there was no restorative sleep (1.5-2h) then I'd AP a nap.
i think im a prop...i can usually only get him soothed if i am holding him....how do i solve that?
Sounds to me like you are already in the right direction.
There is a lot of information here:
Sleep Training - the early daysand this is a good link as well:
Getting started - how I survived the first 3 monthsHTH
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