Author Topic: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)  (Read 1323 times)

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Offline J_Lem

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Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« on: August 23, 2014, 03:00:10 am »
Hello, I am a new mom of a 9wk old DD. I have been trying to schedule her for about three weeks now but am having real trouble with her sleeping and napping. She is a cat napper (45 min is her longest nap to date) which makes it difficult to find sample schedules to relate to, as well as she is very inconsistent with her self soothing. Some day she falls asleep with no problems and sleeps for 30-45min (this is a long nap for her) but then sometimes she refuses to be put down and will cry and become very upset unless I pick her up and soothe her. Than she will only sleep in 5-10min spurts with me soothing her back to sleep in between. I always put her in her crib when she is very sleepy but not asleep but then she wakes up as soon as she touches the crib mattress. I "shhh" her and touch her but sometimes that is not enough. I guess my question is, is there something I can do differently to make her more consistent? Or is it still too early to stress out about it? She is so strong willed that I cannot get her to go to sleep before she is tired and that is never a consistent time. I am able to get her to eat on a regular schedule but her sleeping is all over the map. She is also a very light sleeper and will wake over anything (opening the fridge) and is then very hard to settle without holding her or sometimes she just stays awake. Yes we have a noise machine and no it does not make a difference.  Her schedule is
E-8am,11am,2pm,5pm,8pm
A- after every feed until she shows signs of tired. Bath at 7:15pm.
S-whenever she yawns/rubs eyes 30-45min nap
Y-non existent (haha)

At night she sleeps pretty good. Waking 1-3times (every 3-6hrs) depending on the day. I cannot do the dream feed as I am parenting alone most nights and cannot stay up that late.

Any insights,advice,examples or support is appreciated. I am  trying to remember she is just a baby and we are both still learning......but some "me time" would be appreciated at this point.

Sorry for the long post. I wasn't sure how much detail to put.

Jenny

Offline deb

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #1 on: August 23, 2014, 12:33:02 pm »
Sounds a lot like my DD2. I ended up wearing her a lot and let her sleep whenever she wanted to. We joked that for her first two years, her sleep schedule NEVER repeated: she'd wake at different times, sleep at different time and for different lengths of time.... I had to give it up for my own sanity (and because I had another child at the time as well!).

Might there be reflux as part of the problem? Check out the Reflux101 post in Colic/Reflux/Crying and see if anything rings a bell.

Also, at the bottom of the Naps FAQ's board is a post I did when my DD1 was short-napping; reflux was a player there, but Tracy helped us sort out the rest.

Hope this helps!

Offline dache

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #2 on: August 23, 2014, 15:30:42 pm »
Hi Jenny, welcome.
Sorry to hear you are having a hard time with your lo.
Depending on how long she`s been awake before the feed, plus the milk itself its normal that she seems tiered. If you dont want to teach her to fall asleep on the breast you need to work to keep her awake as mush as possible, but not to the over tiered.
I was also wondering, have you done the personality test for your baby? You can check it here
The BW "Know Your Baby Quiz"
Also it will be a good idea to take a look at this Average A times- BOOKMARK ME! .One reason for short naps can be under tiredness.
Deb is also right, you should check is its a health issue. Here is a direct link to the thread that Deb mentioned
Reflux 101 - General reflux information
I think it will also be halpfull if you look at these
Getting started - how I survived the first 3 months
Recognising a Babies Cries

And you can find find a lot of the sleep issues cover here
Sleep Training  - the early days

Hope I helped. Keep us posted on how things are going. Good lock.



Offline J_Lem

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #3 on: August 24, 2014, 04:06:44 am »
Thanks for all the replies. I feel better just knowing someone is trying to help.
So I did some more reading and I'm a bit stumped but also a bit relieved. My baby is half touchy and half spirited (this is NO SURPRISE). I put baby down in at the beginning of stage 3 sleep (which the book says to do) but then she just wakes up! I "shh" her and touch her tummy and it usually works. I guess I'm not too worried about her and her independent sleep, she seems to fall asleep pretty independently. However! She will never STAY asleep for longer than 30-45min which messes up the EASY schedule. I'm just not sure if there is anything I can do differently? She always takes short naps and after her 8pm feed she doesn't fall asleep until about 930-10pm. Is this normal?? I know she is not lacking in sleep as she is a happy and energetic baby. But I'm not sure how to follow EASY when she just doesn't sleep for 1-2hrs in the day. At night once she is asleep she is pretty good. But we are trying to curb the co-sleeping so some nights are good and others not. She feeds great on the schedule and plays great, but the sleeping is a challenge and the "me time" is non-existent. So I guess my main questions are....should I just keep doing what  doing? Or change something? I can't make her sleep if she is not tired "on schedule" and I can't make her sleep longer. So I'm sort of at a loss. Also reflux is not an issue.
Thanks again
Jenny

Offline dache

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2014, 07:33:54 am »
Can you write down how your days go, her Easy just to give us an idea of what your day looks like?
You can just write down as you go about the day, or use this one
EASY Log downloads
We also had short naps issues but they worked them selves out once she was on reflux meds.
Dont worry, there is hope. If my lo can do solid naps, so can yours!
You little one is tricky. Spirited babies need a lot of stimulation but touchy babies can get over stimulated easily.Did you also looked at the support bards for raising touchy and spirited babies? You might find some useful advice that will work for your lo.
How are your nights when she is not co-sleeping? Does she falls asleep in the cot or in your bed?



Offline J_Lem

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2014, 18:25:49 pm »
Last night she slept in her crib all night, only waking twice to eat. She would get very sleepy in our arms and then fall asleep in the crib. I think the general concern is her short naps and not staying asleep in the day and that she won't go to bed at night until about 10pm. I will search for some advice. She falls asleep in the crib independently but always wakes up after 5-10min. Sometimes she can get back to sleep on her own. But today I basically had to stand in her room for a half hour as she continued wake up and stay awake. I would not lift her up unless she became frustrated (I would be frustrated too if I were her). I am hopeful the older she gets and less twitchy she may be able to sleep for longer periods which will help maintain a schedule. I'm pretty strict with the eating schedule so atleast she has that. Haha. Poor girl.  Thanks again!

Offline dache

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Re: Sleep trouble. (Sorry, this is a long post)
« Reply #6 on: August 24, 2014, 18:51:38 pm »
If you put her to sleep on her own in the crib during naps but then have her sleeping in your bed at night I think it confuses her. Once you are there, and other times you are not. Maybe you should try and have her sleep in the crib a few night on her own and see if that makes a difference.
I was wondering, do you swaddle her?
If you post her Easy maybe there will be something that will jump out.
What time does she wakes up in the morning? How many hours of sleep she has in total?
Is she over tiered?-that can also be a reason for short naps!
What methods have you tired to teach her to self sooth? This might help you.
Shush-pat - How to

Also one important question, that I should have started with  :)
Was she always taking naps like this? Could it be that she is going trough a growth spurt?