Dummy

[Mumoftwoundertwo]

I’m new to the forum so sorry if I don’t put this all down correctly. I had severe sleep deprivation which led tp pnd and pna with DS1. DS2 is now 7 weeks and I’m paranoid about repeating our sleep issues. I know he’s young but we’ve been doing EASY since he was born. The problem we have is that he wakes when his dummy falls out and we end up putting it back in over and over again, especially at nap times. He’s a very sucky baby and the dummy soothes him but I’m worried it’s a prop and will stop him extending sleep through the night. He’s EBF Our EASY is:

7am feed
8am sleep in side crib (wakes at 10,20 and 45 mins, once settled and we replace dummy, hold hand on chest until he falls asleep). Resettle after 45 mins is sometimes successful but takes up to 40 mins of replacing dummy every few mins. Nap is longer if I sleep beside crib
10am feed
11am nap in pram (as at 8am, same problem if just pram bassinet or if out walking)
1pm feed
2pm nap in pram
4pm feed
5-6.15pm nap in crib
7pm feed, bath, bedtime asleep by 8pm
10.30 dreamfeed
1.30am feed
4.30am feed (rarely sleeps longer than 1hour after this feed then replace dummy/hand on chest to get back to sleep. Wakes again around 6.30am)

He’s swaddled and we play white noise/have a wind down routine but I don’t know how to fix the dummy issue which I think is causing short naps/more frequent night wakes.

Any advice would be great

[becj86]

Hi, welcome

I think what you've got going is a pretty good routine and the sleep issues you have right now are pretty normal with or without the dummy - he's learning to sleep. From what you've said, his night sleep is pretty good for his age. Its a bit early to tell how he's going to go extending night sleep on his own but if you're letting him wake for night feeds (unless you've been advised to wake him by medical professionals, of course), then you're doing what you can to let him extend his night stretches on his own. In my experience, the dummy hasn't caused a LO to not extend night stretches on their own unless its soothing something such as gas or reflux pain.

Dummies can be a bit tricky - sometimes LO can't quite keep the dummy in due to the shape of the teat - its worth trying different styles to find one that stays in better. Some people have more luck with cherry type ones but my DS never would take one of those. Sometimes having a teat that is softer helps because it mimics the breast better.

What I would say about the waking after the 4:30 feed would be that it could well be gas at that point, that's classically around an hour after the feed. If he's taking a dummy and going back to sleep, that's pretty good really, at this age as it can sometimes be excruciating for the poor little bubs and it can ruin the rest of the night.

[Mumoftwoundertwo]

Thanks so much for the reply. We’re having a total nightmare atm - DS wakes every few mins wanting us to replace the dummy. He settled after the 10.30pm dreamfeed but for all naps and at bedtime we have been replacing it up to 50 times and I don’t think we can keep going.

I managed to ssh pat for 8am nap (he had dummy when I sat with him for lullaby but I removed before putting him in crib). He slept for 45 mins but ssh pat for resttle was completely unsuccessful and I caved after 45 mins and gave him back the dummy - he fell asleep straight away but woke when the dummy fell out after 10 mins.

Sorry to keep posting about this but I feel like a complete failure especially giving him back the dummy. Just so worried about him getting OT and not 100% committed to removing the dummy as it soothes him.

Really don’t know what to do but going upstairs and in/out of his room every few minutes cant be the right thing?

[becj86]

This is unusual - to be doing this every few minutes for the entirety of a nap. That suggests there's something else at play at this age.

Any signs of reflux? https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=654.0
Or gas? https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=63604.0

Is he otherwise happy during A time? Making plenty of wet nappies, smiling, feeding well? Is he swaddled for naps?

If he just waking up out of the sleepy newborn stage and needing more A time?

Growth spurt?

going upstairs and in/out of his room every few minutes cant be the right thing?

Its just not sustainable.

Sorry, that's a lot of questions but I'm just trying to think of what we can rule out and how we can get this little fellow sleeping better for you, it sounds so frustrating!

[Mumoftwoundertwo]

Thank you for taking the time to answer. He’s otherwise healthy, no reflux and he burps well (we use infacol).. When he wakes after 45mins (or even 20) he’s usually happy during A time. I settled him for his 11am nap using ssh pat (only used dummy to calm through lullaby). Hr woke after 10mins but resttled himself (with me still in the room) then woke after 45 mins. I managed to resettle him after 25 mins of ssh pat and pick up but he had the dummy (I caved again as he was screaming so much), he fell asleep with the dummy in and kept it in until I woke him 50 mins later for a feed.

But then his 2pm nap took half an hour of ssh/pat without dummy and he woke 10 mins later. I’ve spent another 25mins getting him back down (and gave him the dummy in the end again). No idea how long he’ll stay down for now but I’ve completely failed today to get rid of the dummy and I’m now dreading another bedtime of reinserting it...

Sorry for long post - I’m struggling without the sleep and feel like DS1 is missing out on seeing me when I’m in and out/sssh-pating DS2 constantly

[Mumoftwoundertwo]

Up date: nap aborted after multiple attempts to resettle after 20 min nap and put DS in sling so not OT.

He went down for 30 mins at 5pm nap after 45 mins of sssh pat (awake at 6.10) BUT nightime - I’ve spent the past two hours sssh patting with zero effect and finally gave in to the dummy again which settled him instnatly (any attempts to remove resulted in screaming) and we’ve now reinserted 8 times in 20 minutes.... I am at the end of my tether (think uncontrollable irrational crying mess) and have no idea what to do.

Please help

[becj86]

He's really wanting that dummy for some reason. At this age its usually to do with physical comfort. I'd probably just bank on using it for a while in your shoes but if you want to wean it, you can - your choice of course.

Is he spitting it out or just losing it?

I think he may be undertired - would you try keeping him up a little longer before a nap to see if he settles better?