Transitioning to a 3.5hr EASY - kinda stressed

[RBailey]

I am looking for suggestions on how to start a 3.5hr. routine for my 9 week old DD as she doesn't seem all that hungry at the 3hr mark.
Currently her routine is as follows:
I wake her up at 7am (change her)
E: 7:30am (at the latest)
A: 8:00-8:30am (she will start getting a bit cranky around 8:30am so we will head upstairs for her nap)
S: 8:45-10:15am (right now she is sleeping anywhere from 45min to 1.5hrs - I also wake her at the 1.5hr mark so she can eat at the 3hr mark)
E: 10:30-11:00 or 11:15am (she takes approx. 35-45min to eat)
A: 11:15 - 11:45
S: 12-1:15
E: 1:30-2:00 or 2:15
A: 2:15-2:45
S: 3:00-4:15
E: 4:30-5:00 or 5:15
A: 5:15-6:00
S: 6:10-7:15
E: 7:30 -8:00
Bath at 8:10 (lotion and dressed for bed)
S: 9:00 (she seems to take a long time to settle so she is most likely asleep at around 9:30pm which I think it WAY too late.
I would love her bedtime to be around 7:30 or 8:00pm

Since starting the EASY program I have never cluster fed her but I do DF at approx. 10:45pm.  She has slept through the night since she was 4 weeks old (I know I am really lucky).  However, I have to wake her in the morning since I feel that if I just let her sleep that she will have a later bed time and I do not want that.

I also would like to know if I should stop watching the clock so much.  I feel like since starting the EASY program that I am watching the clock to make sure she eat around the 3hr. mark b/c I am so worried that she will be going to bed really late which I want to avoid.  Since I wake her at 7:00am she could most likely go to bed earlier and then maybe wake herself up at approx. 7:00am.  She has never woken herself up at 7:00am b/c she is hungry.  I am the one waking her up.

Please help.  I am starting to get stressed out and would like some suggestions.  I feel that I should let her guide me with when she is hungry but then it all comes back to it possibly leading to a late, late bed time.

Looking forward to some suggestions.

[Grace's Mom]

Are you breastfeeding or bottle feeding? 
I am thinking that your lo is not hungry at the 3 hour mark because she is taking a good long while to eat thus after she finishes only has 2.25 hour to go until the next feed.

I agree, 9pm is a bit late for bedtime.  You want to go for a 12 hour day and a 12 hour night (of course it varies a tad here and there).

The thing with EASY is that it's a balance between watching the clock and following your lo.  You don't want the clock to rule but you also want to make sure you are respecting your lo while making sure your lo is taking over, iykwim.  as sometimes their cues may not be right on...some lo's have late tired signs and sound hungry when they are really bored, etc.   If your lo needs to eat a few minutes early thats fine and if your lo needs to eat a few minutes later than normal that's fine too.

A typical 9 week routine:
About 1-1.5 hours of A time
4 naps...1.5-2 hours each with the 4th nap usually being a cat nap

-Melissa

[RBailey]

I am BF except for the DF at night (I give her a bottle of pumped milk).

You mentioned that I should be aiming for a 12hr day and 12hr night; however, if I am on a 3hr routine right now her last feed is at approx. 7:30pm, we then bath her and put her to bed.  Therefore, it is an approx. 13.5hr day.  By the time she finishes eating (35min) and bath her it is almost 9pm.  The only way I can think of getting her to bed earlier is doing the 3.5 hr routine so she will be in bed at around 8-8:30pm.  Which is not a bad thing.

Right now my lo's naps range from 45min to 1.5hr.  She has only gone 2hrs a couple of times.  But when she does wake early I just leave her in her crib b/c she doesn't cry.  She just lays there, talks to herself and sometimes goes back to sleep.  I will wake her no longer than the 2 hr. mark for naps as I don't want her sleeping too much during the day.  She also only lasts approx. 1.5hrs (from the time she wakes up, eats and then plays) until she wants to go back to bed for another nap.

By the way, what does "iykwim" mean?  I am new to the lingo on this website.

Thank you for your input.  I really do appreciate it.  I'm going to try the 3.5hr routine.  Hopefully she will pick up the time it takes to feed.

Rachel 

[mommy2mason]

Hello,
My lo's almost 5 months now, but I think we went to a 3.5 hour routine around 9 or 10 weeks. It sounds like your lo is ready for a little longer routine. I'll post ours just for an idea for you. Also, I think "iykwim" means, "If you know what I mean." I remember the 3.5 hour routine being a little tricky in the beginning as my lo still couldn't handle too much awake time and didn't always nap for 2 hours, so sometimes we would have some awake time before he ate. I do not breastfeed so I know it will be a little different for you and you could still do the dreamfeed. We tried the df a few times but my lo still woke up at the same time regardless so we don't do it.

7/7:30am-Wakes on his own/Eats
9:00am-11:00am-Nap (approx. times...sometimes 15 min. down/up earlier/later)
11:00am-Eat
12:45/1ish-2:30-Nap
2:30-Eat
4ish-5ish-Nap (Catnap, usually 45 min.)
6:00-Half of his bottle (this is all he'll take here), then bath
6:20-Finishes bottle and bed at 6:30pm
He sleeps through until 7/7:30am

[Grace's Mom]

Samply 3 hour EASY with in a 12(ish) hour period (in case you wanted to aim for that)...

7am wake and feed
8:3-10 nap
10 wake and feed
11:30-1 nap
1 wake and feed
2:30-4pm nap
4pm wake and feed
5:00-5:30 nap
Bath, etc.
7pm feed/bed (you can start the feed a little bit early if needed...also, not all can stay awake 1.5 hours...some are awake closer to 1 hour and sleep closer to 2 hours and that's ok too..it's all about the unique needs of each individual baby).

Not every day will be exactly 12 hours but it's around that time frame that you will want to strive for as the more sleep they are able to get at night the better. 

45 minute naps usually mean your lo is in need of a bit more A time!

iykwim...if you know what I mean 

Hope all goes well with the 3.5 hour EASY, let us know if we can help in any way.

Melissa

[RBailey]

Thank you again for your responses.  I really appreciate it. 

So transitioning to a 3.5hr routine, means no more cluster feeding?  I know I said that I do not cluster feed, but was not sure and wanted a clarification.
Right now my lo will feed at approx. 4:30pm and then again at 7:30pm, then bath and bed by 8:45-9pm as it seems that she never really naps/sleeps after her 4:30-5pm feed.  Therefore, I am a bit concerned that if I move her to a 3.5hr routine and bedtime is now 7:30pm (which I think is great) that she will not fall asleep really and stay awake for a long period of time.

I guess the only way of knowing is actually trying.

Rachel

[Grace's Mom]

We kind of moved cold turkey from a 3-4 hour EASY so not 100% sure on the cluster feeding, plus we never did a traditional cluster feed.

What we did was give her 1/2 a feed before her bath and then whatever else she would drink after her bath/right before bed.  This seemed to get us an extra ounce or two in her as she was a small eater.  You should do whatever you feel your lo needs...kind of create your own unique routine to best fit what you and your lo needs. 

If you do start the transition, be sure to take things slowly and don't expect it to go perfect the first day.  It all takes time (3-5 days for their bodies to adjust to change) and consistency. 

You'll do great. 

Melissa

[RBailey]

Thanks Melissa. 

You have a been a great help and I really like your encouraging words. 

Today was the 1st day of 3.5hr routine.  She slept really well on the 1st 2 naps (2hrs....almost) but not so well on the 3rd nap b/c she came out of her swaddle, followed by a big poop.     But so far so good. 

Tonight I have let her have a cat nap before her last feed (8pm - cluster), bath and then bad.  However, tomorrow I am going to see how she fairs when I put her to bed after her 6pm feed instead.  Wonder what time she will get up. 

Thanks again for the great motherly advise.  As you can tell I am a new mom. 

Rachel

[Grace's Mom]

You are so very welcome.

Glad you had such a great first and second nap.   

At least you have a good sense of humor about the poop.  Poop does happen and it tends to mess up naps. 

Let me know how things go.  The first few nights may be a bit rough, but stick to it and wait it out.  If he does wake be sure to keep him in his room...dark and quiet so he knows it's not time to get up.

Talk to you soon.
Melissa

[Grace's Mom]

Rachel.

Just checking in to see how things are going.  Hope all is well.

-Melissa

[RBailey]

Sorry I haven't responded lately.  I haven't been checking e-mails that often.
Things are going very well.  Naveen is sleeping very well at night.  We put her to bed at 7:45pm and she almost always sleeps until I wake her up at 7:20am in the morning.  Some nights she will wake up within 30 min of putting her to bed but she will fall asleep again within the hour.
Now I am just dealing with short naps, but I am not really stressed about them as Naveen just lies in her crib awake and looking around.  She will drift off to sleep eventually and then wake up again.  I'm sure after a while she will learn to sleep for the 1.5-2 hrs that she is supposed to. 
Tomorrow she will be 3 months old.  I can hardly beleive it.

Thanks for checking in on us.

Rachel

[Grace's Mom]

Congrats on all the new wonderful things and HAPPY 3 MONTHS!  The fun is just beginning. 

Melissa