I have a cling-on..........is this a bad case of separation anxiety?

[finlays mam]

  Mods...i wasn't entirely sure where i should post this so please shift me if need be

Finlay is 16months old and full oooonnnnnnn!! .....if me and dh are together it's all me, i cannot move for Finlay.  If i move into another room he follows me. If i go upstairs without letting him know he cries after me.  Fraser can't put him in the bath anymore, it has to be me and if we try to role reverse, Finlay becomes hysterical.  We do the distraction stuff and to some degree it works but i am finding it suffocating because i know my little fella just wants to be with me.....i wish dh felt the same way ...

any suggestions ladies and if this is separation anxiety, does it pass?

thank you x

[lilmonkey]

Sounds like SA and it's normal at around this age.  I read that SA shows its ugly head about every 6 mos until they reach school aged.  It will pass and depending on the child, it can be as as quickly as a few weeks or even longer.  One thing I learned is to fill up their mommy cup with lots of cuddles and attention during this stage and it will pass fairly quickly.  Also, you could try leaving him for a few minutes at a time to get him used to the concept that momy will be back.  For example, tell him you have to get something in the next room and will be back in a second.  Leave and then come back in a few seconds.  Slowly increase the time to a few minutes or until your lo is comfortable with you leaving for a long time.   

You've probably heard this before but one day he will prefer dh over you in some areas.  I remember a time when dh is the only person that can give dd a bath and read her bedtime stories. 

HTH

[finlays mam]

Mimi, thanks for the reassurance!!  I know he'll want Fraser but it's the now that's a bit heavy going!! It's affecting our sleep too which is another story!!  Thanks again

Debbie

[lilmonkey]

WI/WO works wonders for us when dd was going through SA as a toddler.  PD didn't work so well but then again she never liked PU/PD as a baby.     Hope your nights improve soon.

[finlays mam]

thanks mimi, we have been having some great nights but alas the party fairies heard me boasting about it   PU/PD never worked for me either...i think i'll take a look at wI/WO and see if we can take direction from it x