21 mth old sleep needed

[sarahandtom]

My 21 mth old daughter has never been a good sleeper but in the last few weeks she refuses to have her 1pm nap unless i pat her back.  Now for the last three mornings she has been waking up at 4am doing a poo and refusing to go back to sleep.  I have tried leaving her dirty nappy on, changing it but neither work.  I desperately need advice because Im starting to feel like a bad mother

[Layla]

Hi & welcome

So... does she go from 4am until 1pm before nap starts? How long does she sleep and what time do you put her to bed? Does she wake up at night needing patting to get back to sleep?

Layla

[sarahandtom]

yes she then stays up til 1pm and is VERY grumpy but still wont go to sleep until she has been patted.  We dont have a problem getting her to go to sleep at 7pm for her night sleep until friday when her dad put her to bed and she did not go to sleep until 9pm, but then was up again at 5

[Layla]

I think you need to try an earlier nap. She's probably too overtired to put herself to sleep. If she's awake that early, you need to try and offer her a nap around 10.30-11am with bedtime around 5.30-6pm. An earlier nap and bedtime will give her a chance to catch up on sleep and then you can look at pushing her nap out to 12-1pm or so. I think the reason why she wakes up that early and unable to get back to sleep is because she's too overtired to.

[sarahandtom]

thanks I will give it a go