Sleep resistence!! Can someone help?

[VeronikaMW]

Hi there,

My little boy is 8 weeks old and we have been doing EASY for about 5 weeks. He feeds (breast feeding) every 2.5-3 hours during the day, still wakes once or twice during the night (around 2-3 and 5-6) for food by that's Ok with me. He has always been a bit difficult to settle in the ealry evening (he has a bath/ feed/ and a cuddle and we settle him in his cot around 6.30 to 7pm) but during the day he has been settling himself to sleep wihtout problems.

for about a week now he has also started to make a fuss about bedtime during the day and re-reading Tracy's advice I have been spending more attention to the four 'S' it seemed to work in the beginning (although it still took about 30 minutes to settle) but now it just got worse and worse and seemed to get out of hand, I think he gets easily overtired so I start the wind down as soon as he yawns but he cries as soon as I put him down, I keep with the shh pat but his crying escalates so he actually had a coughing fit, I can't even console him on the breast anymore (I know I shouldn't but I got desperate!), dummy doesn't help either and this morning he resisted his sleep for a whole two hours. I don't know what I am doing wrong and i would be very grateful for help, before this gets any worse.

BTW we have never let him CIO and apart from the first two weeks he always sleeps in his cot in his own room. SO there has been no recent bed change. I also noticed that he often wakes up crying or even cries in his sleep. Is this normal?

[rob1lu2]

Hi There,

Could you post your schedule? It sounds like he is OT and possibly OS and that's why he wakes crying and is taking a long time to settle.

Thanks,
Lu

[*Nicola*]

Just offering some (((Hugs))) Veronika

[VeronikaMW]

Thanks both...here is my schedule on a good day :-)

6-7 am wake up and feed (if before 6.30 I put him back down to sleep for a catnap, works fine)
7.30 A
8 am 1st S

10 am E
10.30 A
11sh S

1pm sh E
1.20 A
1.40 (or earlier) S (he seems to be very tired at this time)

3.30 sh E
3.50pm A
4.15 catnap until about 5.15

5.15pm (sh) E
5.45pm bath etc
6.15 sh top up feed
6.30 sleep (if I'm lucky :-)

8.30sh E

11sh dream feed

anywhere between 2am and 4am feed

But guess what this morning he has gone down beautifully for his first nap. I changed three things: taped up the window so it's pitchblack (I was watching him and he was looking around all the time so thought he gets even more overstimulated by looking around his room) I elevated his mattress as he was throwing up this am after his feed and thought he might have some reflux? and I actually stopped the shh pat but just swaddled him, gave him a kiss and put him to bed. Could it be that he actually hates the sh pat etc or it's making him more OS?

many thanks for all your help!

Vx

[rob1lu2]

V,

It's entirely possible that he hates the sh/pat. My girls both did. One daughter in particular HATES to be touched. What's his temperment?

Sounds like you had a bit of success, and your schedule looks pretty good. Looks like he's getting tons of sleep during the day. How's it going?

Lu

[VeronikaMW]

I don't know whether he was having a growth spurt or something else upset him or whether he just wants to be left alone, but now I just swaddle him as soon as shows signs of tiredness (he does need his sleep, he doesn't seem to be able to cope with more than 15 -20 minutes activity yet) give him a kiss, put him in his cot and he grumbles for a little while but then goes to sleep independently. He generally get easily OT/OS I think but when awake he's happy otherwise smiling and cooing.

he is still a bit grumpy in the early evening and takes longer to settle (he always has been at that time, hence me wanting to try the shh/pat) but other than that we're back to normal. Do babies calm down in the evening as they get older? I have spoken to a few mums and they also said that early evening is grumpy time!



V

[emz1907]

Hi, just wanted to reply to your last question there. My lo is 6 months now and can still get grumpy in the late afternoon/early evening. I think by that time everything they've done during the day catches up with them and they are very tired. I personally make that last A time quite a quiet one and try not to get in his face as much. I will maybe leave him playing on his mat with one or two toys, nothing in his face over the top. With us that last catnap is very hit and miss and if its not successful the evening quickly downs downhill, sometimes resulting in an early bedtime. Ive found a good walk in his pushchair is beneficial as he will either nap or just have some quiet down time while watching the world go by. Also the fresh air helps for night time sleep.

I think its great you can get your lo down so easy, there will be times such as growth and development changes that interrupt your routine for a while but hopefully you've got a good foundation there to fall back on when they're over:)

[rob1lu2]

They call that The Children's Hour - or in our house we call it The Witching Hour or The Meltdown. It's the accumulation of so many things happening all day.

Sounds like you've come up with a great solution! So glad to hear it's working for you!

Lu

[VeronikaMW]

We figured that it must be some sort of witching hour :-) I try to put him down for a catnap around 4.30/ 5 om before his bath but he doesn't always sleep then, walking may be a good idea, our dog will appreciate another walk as well! I have definitely noticed that he gets grumpier as the day goes on... also he seems to want to feed all the time between 5pm and 8pm as if he is doing his own cluster feeds, first i was really worried that he is becoming a snacker but he doesn't do it at any other time so I figured it's Ok to feed him every 1 1/2 to 2 hours then? he also seems to settle easier in the evening on the boob... but as he goes down so well for his sleeps during the day again, I figure I'll just let him have a bit of boob comfort before bed time...

I think I really over estimated in the beginning for how long these little ones can stay awake for and he was getting OT/OS hence the problems with going to sleep... now I put him down straight away when tired even if he only had 10 min A.

It's hard especially for my husband as we want to cuddle/ play with him all the time, but I reckon he is going to be able to stay awake longer the older he gets... how long does your 6 month old stay awake for?

[emz1907]

At the moment around 2hrs at a time, sometimes a little more. I felt much the same that you only seemed to 'see' them for such short periods, but that changes as they grow. Just make sure you make the most of each awake time as Im sure you do. Sometimes Im so tired Im glad when he goes down for his nap, but you do get the times when I feel I haven't seen him in ages and can't wake for him to wake up. especially when you go in and he gives you the biggest cheesy grin ever you can't help but beam at him

Also from what I remember my lo went through a phase of almost self clustering in the evening too. It didn't last long but I do recall reading the book and thinking 'hey he does that anyway on his own'LOL.

I know my dog appreciates the extra walks, although teaching him to walk nice by the side of the buggy has been a challenge. I think we walk to slow with him when Im pushing callum too, he's used to a fast paced walk LOL

[VeronikaMW]

Yes same here, our dog keeps forgetting there is a pram and keeps running into it :-)

We'll just have to be patient and wait until he's a bit older and can cope with more A time... In the mean time I shall just watch him sleep, he's so cute when he's lying in his cot all bundled up...

[emz1907]

I think after he got his paws rode over a few times our dog finally got the idea to stay on one side! Its definetly a mastered art to keep one hand on the buggy handle and one with the lead an manage to walk in a straight line - or maybe thats just me! LOL

They are so cute when they're asleep, my advice would be to just treasure every moment. Even though it wasn't that long ago its hard to remember what my lo was like when he was really tiny. I got some good advice to take pictures a smuch as you can as they grow so fast and its true! I look back and think wow he was so small:)

[rob1lu2]

I know it's hard b/c you want to hang out with the bub, but we spent a lot of time holding them while they slept and just stared at them. It was before I found BW and I held them all the time. They were able to fall asleep outside of my arms too, luckily. Not too much AP going on there.

My girls naturally wanted to clusterfeed later in the day, and they still do. They don't eat very much bfast or first snack, but they can practically eat nonstop from about 2pm on. I wouldn't worry about it. Babies know how much they want to eat. Feel free to feed him!

It's true too that even now my girls get less and less tolerant as the day wears on. The day seems to wear on them. Try putting him down earlier, or just doing the walk will be great. We often walked our girls when they were that age at that time. It settled them down and it settled us down.

Good luck!
Lu

[emz1907]

I agree that the walk is also good for us mums! If you've been stuck in the house all day especially with a bad napper the last thing you may feel like doing is an hours walk but the fresh air and change of scenery really does you good. Clears out those cobwebs

[rob1lu2]

Totally agree with that. I used to spend all day cooped up in the house trying to make sure both girls got their correct naps. And then when it went all wonky, they were on different sleep schedules, and I REALLY never left the house. But once DH got home, he could see the glitter in my eyes and would force me to get out.

Gosh it was a life saver. Just to breath the fresh air, and see different scenery. Put a whole new spin on life.

Good luck!
Lu