AAARGH! So frustrated, whats going on???

[marimul77]

Hello!

Been having an especially bad day today! DD behaving freaky while feeding, more freaky than usual that is!!

Its been one of those all over the place days. Just could not keep on track today, all the eating sleep and activity got mixed up. Even though we are only on a 2 hour EASY normally the sequence is right. Not today though. This is because DD (12 weeks) had an especially tough time feeding today, which led me to take her off the breast several times, simply because it was so frustrating! I must add that she never really settles down to feed at all, she kinda squirms and wriggles her way through them. Today this is what happened every time I tried to feed her:

She latches on fine, I have a let down, and she seems fine for a minute or so. But then she pulls her head away to the side, inwards, not outwards, and starts sucking anywhere but on my nipple When I put her back on she latches fine again, but then does the same thing and so it goes on. She eventually pulls her head back really hard but without releasing my nipple, and that really hurts!! She is not upset when I decide that enough is enough, and we will try later. She will fall asleep briefly and then wakes up looking for food i.e. she turns her head towards my breast and opens her mouth, but when I put her on the whole thing starts over again!!  .

Any ideas as to what is going on here?

thanks,

Marianne

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Hi Marianne, big hugs coming your way{{{{{{}}}}}} hows things today?

Not heard of that one personally but im marking your post for myself and if you want to talk things through im here. Hows her weight gain? wet nappies (6 a day)?

Kate x

[binxyboo]

Just marking my spot for later, Kate is a squirmy worm as well. It would be nice to chat to you!

Is she always cueing to eat at the 2 hour mark?

[marimul77]

Hi Kate

Today has been exactly the same!! I just feel like crying now!! What on earth is up with her? This whole feeding thing is getting me down. In all honesty, breast feeding has not been great for us from the start but because I had a horrible pregnancy, I had SPD, Freya was breech and they tried to turn her without success and I ended up with a C-section, I was even more determined to at least make the breast feeding a success. I only lasted 2 weeks with DD1. Freya is EBF for three months now, which in itself is great I think, but oh my has it been stressful!! I know she has to eat, but I have such a tough time feeding her, and neither of us are enjoying it anymore! The only time she will feed calmy is if I feed her when she is asleep, i.e. dream feed her. At all other times she nearly jumps off my lap!! I seriously think my let down is a problem as there is a lot of coughing and spluttering, but once we are past the let down she just keeps on squirming for the rest of the feed. She probably relatches up to 20 times during a feed and that in itself can't be good with regards to wind issues, right? Her daytime naps are awful, anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes today, so the whole EASY goes wrong! I am going to see my family in Holland on Friday and I am dreading it, feel like locking myself in the house at the moment!! Its just such a shame to have lasted three months but to have struggled throughout and the last few days have been the icing on the cake. Roll on solid food!!
Oh yeah, she puts on about 3-4 oz a week, she was born 5 lb 13 oz and now weighs 9 lb 8 oz at 12 weeks. She has about 6 or 7 dirty napies in a day, its been over 20 (seriously!!) in the past, so she must be getting plenty of food right? As a matter of fact her tummy seems to be on overdrive! I can hear a constant gurgling when she feeds and can even feel it in her lower back and belly. We are seeing the doctor on June 10th because the number of poos has always been an issue, she has been tested for lactose intolerance and tummy bugs but nothing has been found. They have recommended we put her on soya formula in the past but she wont take a bottle. I am glad she would not take the formula as I am so wanting to make the breast feeding work and I am so sad that things are horrible especially at the moment

Thanks for letting me vent!!

Marianne

[marimul77]

Hi Binxyboo,

Because she sleeps for such short periods and wakes up crying I always try and get her to go back to sleep first, but have not ever succeeded. When she is awake she is awake IYKWIM? I am not sure if she is always hungry when she wakes or whether she is waking for another reason, but if i dont feed her soon after waking she gets tired again (because she has such short naps I suppose???)and then just cries and I find it even harder to feed her! We seem to be on 2 hour EASY because of the sleeping not because she is hungry every 2 hours I think?
Nice to know there are more wriggly worms out there!

Marianne.

[deb]

Welcome to the 3-month growth spurt - at least that's what I'm guessing is likely going on. With both my girls the whole eating and sleeping schedule went completely out the window while the increased frequency of feeds built up my milk supply. In a week, maybe 10 days, things gradually got back on track.

Meanwhile, follow cues as best you can, make sure you get some rest and plenty of water whenever possible, and if necessary keep the TV remote handy to ward off boredom.

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

Hi Marianne, OMG I could have wrote your post myself, i had c-section for other reasons, tried to feed other two and it didn't work out (no weight gain with second and sore boobs the first), short naps (yes), I feel like we have almost been on a 'GS' from about 9 weeks (very stressfull at times). Zane is quite calm at feeds but that is the only thing thats not the same. We started solids aout 2 weeks ago now and i feel that he has fed MORE from me now than he did before. Today was the worst day and i seriously considered giving up, just didn't think my supply was ever going to catch up. AND THEN i pumped 3oz after 2hrs so i feel better now.

Anyway got a bit side tracked there sorry, but i wanted you to know that there are other out there with the simular problems.

I bet your wondering now why im still feeding??
Well tbhwy 'IM LOVING IT'.

I've wrote this so you can see that all things can be worked out and i have learned to just go with the flow most of the time with my routine (everyday is slightly different) and sometimes even do EAEAS even EAEAEAS which at times gets me 2.5 - 3hr naps YAY, have you tried this?

Hope you don't think i came on your post to just talk about me, but i know from experience that when you know that others are going through things too it gives you hope that your problems can be sorted out.

Big hugs and hope things work out for you hey have me.
Kate x

[marimul77]

Hi kate,

I would love to try EAEAS but cant see it working. Freya can only stay awake for about 1 hour 15 min max between naps, I just cant seem to stretch it, thats not enough time for EAEA I dont think< May try and see though! By the way had a horrible evening, took me 3 hours to get her to sleep!!! (See post in PU/PD, She cries every time I put her down to sleep; ended up in wrong message board). I too am wondering why I persevere with the breast feeding every day, but you know, a big part of me loves it too!

Marianne

[deb]

Have you read this: https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=649.0 ?

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

with the EAEAS you could you try to feed half an after the first feed.

[anjabibby]

Hi,
Just to let you know that you are definitely not alone. My LO (now 4 months) did exactly what you are describing for about 2 weeks, sometimes she refused to eat anymore than 2 mins on one side. Coughing, pulling off, crying, on again, then off - was awful. The whole routine went completely off track - had no idea what to do with her. She has settled down now, but I was quite strict with keeping to only feed her every 4 hours, as I thought that it would improve things. It didn't, and in fact I think I have done more harm by not feeding her more - as I now think that I am not producing enough milk for her, so am pumping after feeds and offering her top-up EBM. So I would suggest just just try and feed her whenever she seems hungry - not like I did.
big hugs - it will get better xx

[Mum of 3 + 2 stepkids]

You sound like me anjabibby!!!

[Lex444]

Golly, I've had these fussy, squirmy periods and they're just awful. I completely sympathise.

For me, it was partly about letdown. I got used to taking my son off the "firehose", as we call it around my house, letting it flow into a cloth and then putting him back on.

It was also gas - from the letdown and my oversupply. His stomach STILL drives him nuts sometimes at 15 weeks.

It was also about distraction - he still feeds so much better at night in the dark, with nothing else going on.

And yes, a growth spurt also means fussiness.

What I did was just ride it out. What I mean is, I tried to keep feeds roughly every three hours but if he wanted breast earlier, I gave it to him. If he wanted to feed at night, so be it. The main thing is, I kept thinking, that he's eating enough even if it's at night. That was a "blow the routine" time, where I just tried to keep on track but also, when I couldn't, didn't beat myself up about it.

And truly, it passes. It just passes if you feed through it!