LO now rejects me trying to hold/cuddle him before bed because of BW & PU/PD

[sbchic1999]

So what do I do?  My 10 month old used to let me hold him and he would lay in my arms when he was drowsy .  I am the only one doing PU/PD at naps and he now refuses to let me rock him or hold him to get sleepy.  He instantly kicks at me and cries.  However, he lets my DH do this.  This results in half hour- hour of him crying/screaming before naps when I put him down.  Is this normal?  What am I going to do.  We can't do a consistent routine if he won't let me hold him.  I think it is because he is mad at me.  Don't know what to do...

[Peek-a-boo]

{{{Hugs}}}

How long is pu/pd taking to get him to sleep once you get him in the crib?
Could you post your routine?
What temperment is your LO?

With a baby this age, you generally want to put them down relaxed, but not actually drowsy.  It may actually be better to go with a shorter wind down--just 10 minutes or so rather than 30.  Remember too that Tracy says not to fight your LO if he's physically resisting, so if he's arching, twisting, etc, it may be better to just head right for the crib. 

[brenda2]

hugs

we had some trouble with DD who is 10 mo about 2 weeks ago.  she really resisted nap time with crying (not like her at all), but it was because she was ready for more A time.  once we stretched her a bit and put her down more sleepy it was fine.

also, walk in walk out and put down at this age if he previously could go to sleep independently may be better than pu/pd, at this age you don't want to pick them up.  you just lie them back down.

[sbchic1999]

DS used to only have 2 or 2 1/2 hrs of A time since he showed sleepy signs right at the 2 hr mark.  I have stretched it out to 3 last week (today is day 11 of doing BW and a more strict EASY). I used to swaddle him, lay him on the couch next to me and he would doze off and I would then put him in bed.  After starting BW I now read him a story, take him upstairs, rock him for a song or two and then once he looked really sleepy I would put him in bed.  When I would lay him down he would instantly pop awake and start playing.  Now I just read him a story, see if he will let me rock him and put him in bed regardless of how tired he "looks" since I know that doesn't necessarily factor into an easier nap.  He still plays but I WI/WO until he is really upset (and thus more tired) and PU/PD when he needs to be calmed.  I have to PD about 8 or 10 times before he will stay there and let me pat him to sleep. 

Here is our routine:
Oh, and DS is VERY spirited!

8:15-Awake, nurse
8:45-breakfast
11:00-Sleep
12:00-Awake, nurse
1:00-lunch
3:30-Sleep
4:45-5:00-Awake, nurse
6:00-dinner
Bath, light activity
7:30-nurse, bed
8:00-8:30 Sleep

[brenda2]

so only 11 days ago you started not swaddling him and trying to get him to sleep independently in his own bed after 10 months of going to sleep with you?  maybe i read that wrong...but that's a lot of change for a 10 mo and it sounds like you both are doing great.  it takes time.. keep doing what you're doing and he'll catch on.  usually there's a regression after starting something so new as this.

your routine looks great, the only thing that's different for us is we only have 3 bottles a day rather than 4.

[sbchic1999]

Yes, maybe I am expecting too  much too soon.  I guess the most important thing to me is his NW's and they are getting shorter.  Some nights there are few some nights there are still tons but he goes right back down so it's not too bad.  And I didn't feed him last night or 3 nights ago so hopefully I can break him of his middle of the night feed so we are seeing some improvement.  I guess I was getting ahead of myself.  Thanks for reminding me!!

[brenda2]

it will take him some time to catch on, but he will get there and so will you.  10 mo of only knowing one way to sleep is a long time to have to now unlearn it!

keep being consistent with it, as long as you don't go back to what you were doing and keep up with this then he should catch on.