Should I move him from cot to bed now?

[Wiki]

Sorry to ask for advice when I'm hardly on here any more, but now with this redundancy, I'll be back with a vengeance soon I promise!

 Background: Caspar has always been an OK settler for sleep, but never consistently slept through the night until he was gone 2, tho has been pretty good since then. Normally it would be waking for milk, or a "new muslin" or to put his duvet back on...but now...

Since Friday he has been waking up, saying he wants to come into our bed. He has almost never asked for this before, and has only done so when he is ill, from time to time. But this is something new, he's completely adamant, and will yell for up to 1.5 hours if we say no. He was also in a right state trying to climb out of his cot...which he has never done before either. I don't think he is scared of anything as he is completely lucid and will happily talk about cars, the night, cats outside etc when up, but doesn't want to sleep in the cot (he goes down fine in it at bedtime).

I'm planning to get a big boy bed anyway, as no. 2 is due in 13 weeks and I can't deal with leaning over the cot.

Might this make it worse?

Vic

27+2

Caspar 31 months

[mummy_bec]

Hi Wiki,

My son Eoin is 27 months also. He's been in a bed since 22 months for the same reason, new baby on the way. We moved him into the bed 2 months before the baby so that he would get used to his bed and so that he wouldn't have issues with the baby having 'his' bed.

We had a smooth transition but did have issues with him wanting to be in our bed. In the end (after caving one too many times and not sleeping because we had a toddler in our bed), I did 'put down' with him one night at 2am. He called out to us from his bed (he didn't ever get out of his bed and still doesn't - I know that other people have problems with this though). I went into his room and layed him back down. He sat back up with the usual crying etc and I stayed in the room and just kept laying him back down. He got really upset and it took some time (at least 45 mins) but it did work. When he finally settled I kissed him and said I loved him and left. The whole time I was very loving and kept saying things like, "Mummy loves you but you need to sleep in your bed". At one stage when he got really upset I lent over the bed and just cuddled him as he cried and held him down. I had to reinforce maybe 2-3 other times, all shorter and we haven't looked back. We have learnt our lesson though and even when we're really tired etc from a bad night with our baby we don't let out toddler in our bed in the night. As a treat some mornings we let him in our bed for a snuggle but only in the day and never to sleep.

I hope this helps.

Bec

[Wiki]

Bec,

Thanks for replying, that is really helpful. We have done PD with Caspar in the past in his cot, and it rarely lasted for more than 15 mins, so was pretty effective. I find now that I just can't as he is so strong and also with my bump the cot bars get in the way.
Also Caspar wants me for everything at the moment so whilst my OH is willing to help at night, his appearance seems to make things a lot worse.
I was saying similar soothing things to him on Sunday night when he was wanting to come in with us. The way I figure it, it would be easier to do PD when he is in a bed, as there is more space/less obstacles. Also there is a psychological approach as he met many "big boys " (4+ years) on holiday who he knows sleep in their own bed/room...

Hoping the baby will go into a moses basket in our room for at least 4 months (don't think it will be a long baby, Caspar was in the moses for ages!) but if he gets upset with the baby being in our room, I can always sleep in the spare room with the baby to get over that. Anyway, that's maybe looking too far ahead!

[mummy_bec]

Yes, I agree, with the bump it's so hard to do anything with them in the cot. Honestly, I would recommend giving it a go. Try him in the bed. At least it's easier to access and you can always go back to the cot for a while if you don't think it's working. We have one of those safety rail things on the bed and a bedside table with nothing on it next to the bed. When I got really big I sat on the table to read his story at night and do the bedtime routine and it made it sooooo much easier. Anything to make your last few weeks easier has to be a good thing. 

Bec