Help not sure how much more I can physcially take.

[maxysmum]

I'm so tired, for the past 3 or so weeks Max has woken at least 3 times at night, the problem is he's having a bout of SA so I can't leave him until he's asleep or he just cry's until he vomits.

I believe its all to do with the fact that I was taken into hospital, he must have been really scared as he was the only one with me when I was at my worst with pain and such, then he was ripped from DH and me at the hospital, without a chance to say goodbye or explain what was happening, That was about a month ago and since then we've had only a handful of nights of full sleep.

Plus he's getting his last 2nd year molars and has his usual teething cough, plus it could also be that fact that there a new baby on the way and thats all people talk to him about you know the kind of thing "whats mummy got in her tummy" "are you going to be a big brother". I do think its good to talk about it as he's really interested and often kisses and strokes my tummy, but I think its messing him up a bit.

We've been so worried about the pregnancy that he must have felt our anxiety, so we've really tried to spend more one on one time with him to reassure him that we are there for him, and it is another reason why we sit with him rather than do wi/wo and will do a gradual withdrawl when he's ready.

I bought some rescue remedy night, which is suppose to help reduce worrisome thoughts and aid restful sleep, last night was the second night with it and although he woke up he wasn't upset or screaming like he has been.

is there anything else we can do to stop these night wakings?

sorry that was so long

[Colin Macs Mom]

Oh Steph    Is he able to tell you anything about how he's feeling? That really must have been scary for him.

[maxysmum]

If he wakes and is crying/screaming I ask whats wrong but he just clings to me, On the odd night just to get some sleep I've put him in with me and he cuddles right up which is really unusual for him, so I don't think he can tell me whats going on and in the day if I ask if he's ok he just says yes but has been more cuddily. He slept right through last night but woke up screaming at 6am, It makes me want to cry when I think about how scared he must have been!

[mcruari]

Oh Steph! Don't worry too much as u need to relax loads. I think there is not much else u can do. Stay with him and talk about his fears seeing as he can't quite do that yet. HUGS xxx

[maxysmum]

He woke up 6 times last night  , I put him in our bed in the end! Theres no pattern to it at all as for the last 2/3 nights before last night he didn't wake until 5 or 6 am and then all of a sudden back to wake up in the night  . I'm trying so hard to be patient I know its not his fault but I really have to fight leaving him to cry, I just want to sleep 

[Shdef]

After Scotty witnessed the death of his grandad and had to spend a day at the police with no one knowing who he was, hubby and I alternated spending nights in his room, on a mattress.

It did help.

HUGS 

[Tamara]

{{HUGS}} Steph, sounds rough, he's lucky to have such understanding parents.

[amywiz24]

hey steph,
I'm in a similar situation, however, Sam has not had the added scariness of the hospital, me in pain, etc.
But he is screaming and clinging to me at night. I've been doing WI/WO, but I can understand why you may not want to given the added component to your situation. Anyway, the purpose of my post was that I suspect Sam is beginning the process of getting his 2nd yr molars (which I understand is a looooong process  ). I have been giving him tylenol at night before bed and that has helped considerably, both with decreasing the agaony of putting him to bed and less NWs as well---and when the NWs do happen, they are less traumatic. It may be worth a shot. 
ALso, I relaized a lot of this happened when we started to get his new room ready (even though we haven't moved him yet). Which unfortunately coincided with his daddy traveling more and a new room at daycare. No wonder it's a rough time. I've been crying a lot too. 
Hugs to you. 

[maxysmum]

Things just aren't improving, if anything its getting worse, DH has slept in Max's room for the past 2 nights and he has wet the bed for the past 2 nights (max not DH!). he is still waking up very frequently but with DH there he goes back to sleep quickly, and I have been able to sleep so am able to deal with his clinginess during the day.

We are going to decorate his room and make it much more child friendly in a couple of weeks, but first have a wedding to go to in devon this weekend and then the week after we are staying at my parents, I don't know if these changes are going to make things worse or better, maybe a change to routine will help. Oh I wish there was a magic cure!!

[Colin Macs Mom]

I wish I could give you that magic cure Steph!

[*Nicola*]

Just dropping off some (((hugs))) to you sweetie.

It WILL pass xxx

[October]

Steph,

Just stopping by to say I do understand how you must be feeling. I had a worrying 2nd pregnancy after a very premature Felix arrived in Oct '07 (i'm also 41 so you know us oldies can have issues anyway !). It is natural to be concerned if you are in anything like that position yourself. Plus, you are bound to be wondering how Max will adapt. Can I just say, that you WILL be OK, ALL of you. Max will adjust and you will all be so glad you gave him a sibling. We were....in spite of my presence on "then there were 2...." board  !!

We had NWs after I came home with Pasha and it went on a while. We took a fairly tough line after a couple of weeks of very tiring bedtimes with screaming and crying and DH waiting for up to an hour for Felix to go off to sleep. He adjusted and sleeps great mostly now. He also is slowly showing more love to his sister (he takes his time adapting to new things, more than most kiddos).

We too have NWs now after a house move and teething at night. I guess you know best how Max will react to a slower intervention and a quicker return to his crib when he does wake. I always medicate then put Felix straight down and he goes off OK.

I'm here if you want to talk about the pregnancy at all. My 2nd was term ..... 38 weeks to the day !

Deb x 

[maxysmum]

Deb, Thank you so much for your lovely reply, its so nice to hear from someone whos been there and come out the other side. We been given the all clear on the pregnancy front so I'm a lot more relaxed about it. you have given me hope and for that I am eternally grateful