no naps! how do I get this kid to fall asleep?

[new momma]

I've been going nuts for the past few days.  My 6mo old has only been taking one nap a day, 1hr-1hr 30min.  The other naps I have tried to put him down and he just cries.  We have been doing shh pat for awhile but that doesn't seem to help.  Today I was so frustrated and fed up I just let him cry in his crib until his next feeding.  I know it goes against everything the BW says, but it was in the best interest of my son because my nerves were escalating!   He is so crabby the rest of the day so I know he needs more sleep.

Here's his schedule:

wake 7am
E 7-7:20 BF
A until 9am (usually includes some breakfast/solid feeding)
S 9-10:30 (if lucky, sometimes wakes earlier)

E 11am
A until 1
S none, maybe 30 min (1-1:30), usually just a struggle and lots of crying
I have tried adjusting A time, shorter, longer, nothing helps

E 2:30/3
A beats me how long this should be since he has not slept
S usually I try to put him down around 4pm for his "catnap" which is just him fussing and rolling around his crib

E 5:30
A until 7
S between 7/7:30, I usually do one last feeding before bed

help!  I hated leaving my LO to cry, but I don't know what else to do.  I've tried all the BW techniques...he's been an awful sleeper since birth.



E

[EZ-EMom]

I feel your pain.  My son is 7mo and is also battling a vicious circle of being OT.  A couple things that I've been doing that are starting to break the cycle. 

First, shh/pat is a bit too stimulating for LOs the age of ours.  You probably want to try moving to pu/pd.  BWSAYP has a great chapter on how to do pu/pd, and the PU/PD Board here, has useful information (of course).  Its is exhausting, but try to persevere...it really does help.

Second, until you get the OT problem kicked, you might want to try any of, or all of, an earlier bedtime, earlier nap times, quieter A times, etc.

I wish I could offer you more help!  This OT problem is brutal.  I was in tears last night, too.  But, stick with it, and it will get better.

[claires mum]

Poor babies...poor Mummies...it's a crappy old time when they just won't sleep.

Ok...what temperament is your LO?  If you don't know, here's the baby quiz to work it out. 

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=52283.0

Next:  Your LO is definitely OT and we need to break that cycle.  So lets look at all the issues that might be contributing and work through them systematically until we start to resolve:

1)  sleep environment. Is it dark and comfortable. Are all stimulating items removed.  Is there white noise in the background to mask other noises.

2)  swaddling.  Does your LO like to be held...if so, do you swaddle?

3)  developmental issues.  Are there any new milestones happening? 

4)  pain.  Is your LO in pain or suffer from reflux

5)  routine.  We will most likely need to modify the routine to find what works.  Any change that we make you will need to commit to for 3-5 days without interruption to make sure that we know if it does/doesn't work.  We can get to this once we know what temperament he is.

6)  sleep prop.  Can your LO go to sleep independently or does he need your intervention? 

7)  sleep routine.  Do you have a consistent sleep routine including wind down?

  activity time.  It's important to keep the last 20 mins of A time low key so that they are starting to wind down for sleep time. 

9)  vibes in the house.  Often when we are sleep deprived and frustrated, we can affect our LOs because of our vibes.  Sometimes, you really need to work on yourself first so that you can calm down and relax.  If this is you, then you need to take a break if you can and get your head into a better place.  I know what it's like....been there many times.

Lots to think about...lots of strategies to try to resolve this OT cycle.  Hang in there.