On the Verge of Giving Up

[Devyn]

Naptime is just too chaotic.  My son won't sleep for more than 40 minutes for a nap.  He either screams for the full 2 hours of PU/PD or just smiles and plays. 

I don't know what to do.  I find it easier to do when he's screaming than when he's playing, but the screaming is doing my head in.

I keep wanting to give up because I've been doing EASY for 2 weeks now and it hasn't made a bit of difference at nap time...if anything, it's gotten worse!

Please help, I'm desperate.

Here is our current routine:

E: 7am
A: 7.30am
S: 9.30am
E: 11.00am
A: 11.30am
S: 1pm
E: 3pm
A: 3.30pm
S: 5pm (30 min - 1 hour catnap)
E: 6.30
A: Bath
S: 7:00

[parmar1]

Hiya
I dont have the answers unfortunately, gosh I wish I did, but I just wanted to send you hugs..I know what you are going through...I'm in the same boat...and often wonder if this will get better at all...I just keep on going to avoid LO getting OT - in the meantime I'm getting OT...hehehee
Please dont give up...
Oh do you think it is a developmental thing, is your LO trying to master anything, like sitting or rolling etc...or what about teething???

Sorri I cant help further, but you're not alone...

x

[Devyn]

That's how I feel!  Thanks for the support.

Dylan is teething and rolling and sitting and eating solids...all of those things.

[fizzyliftingdrink]

*Hugs*
The same exact things is happening to us.
It really bums me out. 
Our little girl is also six months. 
I don't know how SCREAMING in her crib for an hour and never going back to sleep is going to make her a better napper.

[deckchariot]

Are you giving him anything for the teething pain?  That can really destroy sleep completely.  Also, do you have a wind down routine?  What are you doing for that?  It looks like his first A time is 2.5 hrs, and that's on the upper end for a bub who just turned 6 mos, and often the first A time of the day is the shortest, so you may want to shave some time off of his  A time.  Also, if he's not napping well, the next A times will definitely need to be shorter, as he will just get more OT as the day goes on (thus leading to even more screaming).  Here's a link that explains that:
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=128419.0

Also, if you just started EASY, it is going to take some time for him to adjust - he's had 5.5 mos of doing something different.  It does work, it just can take a bit of tweaking to get you and your little guy on the same page.  Hang in there!!  There's lots of moms to support you here!!

hth
michelle

[KaiArsenault]

I am having the same problem with my six month old and i have tried everything including the pu/pd routine and you are right she either screams or laughs at me.....how is his sleeping at night?  Mine sleeps right through and does short naps through the day.  except for teething grumpiness she is pretty happy most of the day.  As of today i have accepted that she is just a short napper as she can go two hours and still be happy at the end of it.  Most responses i have read say that when they start moving they sometimes go longer as they tire themselves out physically.

[Devyn]

Sorry I haven't replied, but I haven't had a moment to myself!  He won't nap! 

I've got someone saying here to make his first A time shorter, when I had someone else telling me to make his first A time longer.  His first nap can go well (it did once) and then the rest of the naps, he won't sleep, so it doesn't follow that the first nap is well the rest will be well.

I'm so frustrated and it seems at least it was better before the EASY because, though all naps were radically different, at least I could go out, or leave the room or he'd sleep for a fair amount of time.

[bennysmama]

Hi just wanted to send some (((hugs))).

FWIW, I think Michelle is right.  Shortening that first A time works wonders.  You don't have to do it by much - just 15 mins and see what kind of a nap time (if any!) you get.   Any change needs a couple of days to kick in, so stick with it. 

KaiArsenault, if your LO is laughing at you when you do PUPD (yep, know exactly what you mean!! , then I think you should just lie DD down and walk out of the room.  She'll either put herself to sleep or cry/scream.  If she needs your help, then you go back in and soothe and, if that doesn't work, PUPD.   Honestly, I promise you that if you stick at it, it works. 

Devyn, I know what you mean about one nap going fine and then the rest falling apart.  Happened here too!  Once you regularly get that  one decent nap, then the rest follow.  Again, it takes a little bit of time (about 2 weeks in our case) but you *WILL* get there if you stick at it. 

What helped most for us was getting rid of the OT and then playing with "A" times.  So...do whatever it takes for LO to get a good, long stretch of sleep.  Car journey, pram, bouncer, whatever.  Then start sleep-training.   The "A" time in the morning is usually the shortest.  Start looking out for sleepy cues at round the 80-90 minute mark.   

If you get a short nap, then take 15 mins off the next A time.  So let's say you go to sleep at 0900 and, instead of waking up at 11, you wake up at 0945.  That's fine.  Your next A time (instead of being 0945-1145) will then be 0945-1130.   And so on.  If you get a nice, long nap then you go for the full "A" time. 

Oh, and about calculating A time:  "A" time includes everything that isn't sleep.  So, if you're aiming for an asleep time of say 0900, LO needs to be in that cot at 0845.   

Hope something in there helps.
x
Em

[Devyn]

It does, and I will try it.  I'm feeling a tiny bit calmer now because DS actually slept for 2 hours.  I did need to settle him a couple of times when he woke, but it didn't take long and he slept from 1pm to 3pm.  wow.

I will take all of that into consideration for the next time I put him down for a nap.  I will also try walking out when he laughs at me...though I wonder about that.  I did try it once and he ended up playing for an hour in his cot and then started crying.  Then when I did PU/PD for 30 minutes (while he was screaming) he suddenly stopped and started playing again. 

As for teething, I'm giving him teething gel and Tylenol if he really needs it.  As for wind down time, I tend to read him a book, let him look out the window (it slows his breathing), then we say goodbye to Mr. Sun (as we pull the blinds) and goodbye Mr. Light.   Then I cradle him for a bit to let him know it's sleepy time and then put him in his cot.  This usually works wonders, but it doesn't make his sleep last long.

[Joey'sMom]

Hi, I just want to offer a hopeful story:

DS2 was a HORRIBLE napper/sleeper.  Since I didn't know what else to do, I, in my zombie-like state, continued BW.  DS is so touchy and so many people told me to just give up, maybe he wasn't a napper.

But I stuck with it, and right at the 6.5/7 months mark, it clicked in for him.  He now naps beautifully.  He still has his off days, but BW DID end up working because I was consistent.

I know it doesn't work for everyone, but sometimes hearing a success story is encouraging.