Not sure when to feed in night...

[Bella28]

My LO (18weeks) has just started on EASY so we are trying to figure things out still. Right now she has her last feed at about 6:15pm and then bath and bed by 7pm. She has been waking between 10 and 11pm for her DF and I've been feeding her though I do try to do DF before this happens, is this okay? I admit that I'm not very consistant about when she gets DF though it is usually around 10pm.  I have been able to cut out the 2 am waking by w2s (brillant!) but she insists on still waking for 5am. All that she seems to want is to talk in her bed for a bit and for me to plug in her paci a few times (no crying at all) and for me to sooth her back to sleep and then she's good till 7am. Is this okay? I'm thinking that if she was really hungry that I'd know it and she would cry, what do you think?

[bovi]

Hello Bella28, DF works really well for us! I am happy having started that when we got on EASY.
 My lo is on 4 hour EASY, for two weeks now. I wake him about 4 or 4,5 hours after his evening feed. I am never watching very closely  the watch, but I try not to do DF after 23:15 (Tracy sais not to do it very late because that might distract their night sleep.)To my understanding it is not important that DF happens the same time every day, I would even think that it is better if it varies a bit so when you want to phase it out DS is not so attached to it (my thought only!)
 
Good job with the W2S!! well done, it is great to being able to sleep that much, isnt it?   I ve never done that so have no clever advice. 

 
viktoria

[Bella28]

Thank you so much for your reply! So glad to hear that I'm not too far off base with the df! I haven't been too consistent with the w2s at 5 am so maybe I'll give that a better shot and see what happens 

[bovi]

just another thought. Make sure, as much as possible, that he nurses fine with DF, if he gets enough there (and of course during the whole day) he might STTN in the near future. and good luck with the W2S at 5! by the way, is it always at the same time or it differs every time? (bad habit versus hunger)

xxx

[Bella28]

She is taking a full 5-6oz at the df. I know this for sure because at that time I give EBM to ensure that I'm not starving her through the night! It definitely is the same time each night, might vary by 15-30mins max but that is all and once she talks to herself for about 10mins she is easy to put back to sleep so that led me to think that it is habit... but am really afraid that I won't know if it is actually hunger. Should I try feeding her at that time? We then start our day at 7am.

 

[lilac83]

If you haven't been feeding her at the 5am wake up and she's been fine without it, don't start now! Around this time is when the final sleep cycle transition happens and then the LO will go into a final deep sleep for another 1-2 hours. (I read this somewhere but can't for the life of me remember if it was in a BW book or online somewhere). If she's not waking and crying, have you ever left her to see if she would resettle on her own? I agree with pp that w2s might be an option here.

[Bella28]

Thanks, I would have hated to have started another habit! She doesn't cry when she wakes at 5 am or after 40 mins of naps. Right now I am trying to put her back down for the remainder of her nap and am leaving her to resettle. I do try to do that but she'll go on like this for up to or more than a .5hr. How long should I leave her to try to resettle? Until she starts to cry?

[lilac83]

You can leave her for as long as she lets you. Once she starts the "I need you cry" then, of course, go to her and help. That's fine if it takes her 30 minutes to resettle. If you let her do this on her own, pretty soon it should take her less and less time as she learns how. Of course, you may need to shorten her following A time since a broken nap isn't as restorative.

[Bella28]

Brillant! Thanks so much. As a newbie I have a bucket full of questions and sometimes my "motherly instint" just doesn't give me the answers! If I'm understanding correctly then, the routine isn't so much about doing things at the same time by the clock as it is about watching your lo's cues...correct? Should I be waking LO at 7am still like the book says or should I let her wake on her own?? Should she dictate what she needs and when? So confused!

[lilac83]

BW is a mix between clock watching and cue watching. You just need to find the right balance for your LO. I never wake my DD in the morning because I usually sleep until she wakes. This makes the day start anywhere from 6:30-7:15. So things don't happen at the same time but at the same pace and in the same order. Some mom's prefer to wake their LO's at the same time every morning so things remain on a more consistent time frame. Totally up to you!

[Bella28]

Ah ha! Now that makes sense!     Again, many thanks!

[natashacs]

Bella, am in the same position with my LO who is 20 weeks. Usually wakes around 5, I go in a few times ,putting dummy in etc, then he'll drift in and out of sleep, I never speak to him, stay in his room for just a few seconds, don't turn the light on etc. He's not really distressed, just moaning/chatting/shouting. Sometimes goes back to sleep from say 5.30 to 7. I always wake him at 7 no matter what (I am quite strict for a BW person really!)
I was worried by doing this I'd give him a dummy addiction for 5am, but no matter what I am not feeding him. Anyway, this morning he slept until 7 without waking up at 5, and I had to wake him. So he can do it. I think they come into lighter sleep at this point and it may just be a case of waiting until they get a bit older and they realise this is still sleep time. Fingers crossed anyway!!!!

[maggiesmom76]

Hey gals, God knows I don't have this problem because my LO doesn't sleep well enough yet, but wanted to let you know that I recently read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" and in it they talk about the 5am chatterbox -- apparently really really common, and eventually they just grow out of it.  My friend's son would just talk to himself for like an hour every morning and eventually would put himself back to sleep.  Be patient!

[Bella28]

Ah ha! Thank you so much ladies! I was afraid that I was neglecting her when she was telling me that she's hungry! I will make a better effort at letting her fall back to sleep on her own now. Natasha, I think that last night must have been a full moon or something because my DD slept through from 7:30pm to 7 am (w df) without waking at 7 am - this has NEVER happened! The true beauty of it too is that I slept the night through also - no waking for me all night til 7am, a first in a year!
How long does your LO talk for before he falls asleep or you intervene? Am finding that when she wakes early from naps that she needs to chatter for awhile and then after about 10mins I can go in and give her the paci and she'll go back to sleep. Also at night sometimes the same thing happens but she could fuss and talk for a couple hours before she sleeps, a little trying at the very least!

[natashacs]

I definitely spoke to soon, last night, he woke at 3am and was hungry (I fed him which is annoying as he hasn't been fed at night for a few weeks) and then at 5am again, doing his moaning thing. He is more a moaner and an 'I'm about to cry if someone doens't get in here quick' than a chatterer!!!!! I usually intervene after about 10 mins, I give him the dummy and his blanket with a head thing (must get a name for that) am trying to wean him from the dummy onto this lovvie thing.

If my LO wakes before 5am its generally a screaming for food type of thing. I like the way I say 'if' as though that rarely happens! Would be more appopriate to say 'when!'