So discouraged... please help 45 naps

[sgudza]

Wake to sleep question.  Things have been a little bit better.  He sleeps so much better in his car seat which worries me, because of his back. But today i tried wake to sleep and I pressured his joints.  But I ended up staying in there 45 minutes while he jolted.  He's now been sleeping for an hour and fifteen minutes, but he's still jolting.  Is this normal?  Did I prevent him from going back into deep sleep by pressuring his jolts? I'd love not to have to sit 45 minutes of every nap by his bed.  Also, he's really great at putting himself to sleep, but when he wakes up he's always crying.  It doesn't matter how long he's been sleeping, and it's really really hard to calm him back down. Is that normal?
Thanks!

[sgudza]

Wake to sleep question: I tried wake to sleep at the 35 minute mark, and he jolted a little. So I stayed in there to pressure through the jolts.  But I ended up sitting by his bed for 45 minutes while he jolted.  I thought that it normally only takes 20 minutes for them to get back in deep sleep. Do they jolt in deep sleep too? Is that normal or was I preventing him from returning to deep sleep? I'd love not to sit by his bed for 45 min of every nap.  Also, he always always wakes up crying.  It doesn't matter how long he's been asleep, he wakes up crying and is very hard to calm down.  Does that mean he's hungry?  Since he's always crying when he wakes up... do I feed him even if it's only been two hours?
Thanks!
Sorry for all the questions:)

[Archies mummy]

If my lo wakes crying I assume he's still tired and try and get him back to sleep. So if this happens I guess it's OT. I also heard the jolts may be down to OT. The idea of wake to sleep is that you don't have to keep doing it forever, just until lo learns to take longer naps.

[sgudza]

Thanks... Do you have any idea how long on average it takes for them to learn?

[anna*]

It varies from baby to baby. You'll find it gets better, then worse again, then better, then worse - it's always changing. Is your LO swaddled really tightly (sorry can't remember if I asked already) it can help them get past those jolts.

[sgudza]

I try to swaddle him really tight. But he's been coming out of everything.  I live in Poland but I'm going home to the States in a couple weeks, so I want to buy the miracle blanket. Today we had one great nap... 2 hours.  Then the second nap I did wake to sleep and I thought he was in a deep sleep, so I went to take a bath. And of course he woke up.  But I think he's mantra crying. He'll let out a cry then whimper for a minute then let out another cry... but there all pathetic.  I don't want to ignore him, but I also don't want to take away his ability to self soothe. Any thoughts?

[anna*]

That does sound like a mantra cry... I would really try to hang back if there are pauses between the cries - if he needs you the crying will quickly escalate and at that point you go straight in to him.

((hugs)) it's great that he did a two hour nap!!!

[Archies mummy]

Wow 2 hrs?! Well done, obviously doing something right! I agree with Anna I tend to leave lo unless it sounds like he really needs me (unless it's time to get up of course but it never is!!) I use the kidopotamus 'swaddle me' which is pretty hard to escape from.

[rngmom]

I wish there was some way to HEAR a mantra cry, I have no idea how it's different. Do you ladies think that giving a paci when he wakes early from a nap makes it a prop?

[Archies mummy]

Yup 'fraid so. When mine needed replugging to stay asleep thru transitions I knew it was time to wean..........

As for the mantra cry, it doesn't make you go running that's the only way I can describe it! Rather I stand back and wait and see......

[anna*]

I wish there was some way to HEAR a mantra cry, I have no idea how it's different. Do you ladies think that giving a paci when he wakes early from a nap makes it a prop?

All babies sound different. I agree with Sarah though, if you're not sent running, wait a minute. If he really needs you, you will hear it. A mantra cry tends not to get louder and more frantic, but a real cry does.

Re the dummy, it's a fine line. If you're using a dummy to extend a nap, then it's maybe not a prop. But if he's waking up because he's lost his dummy, then it definitely is

[sgudza]

I have a kidopotamus swaddle me and he seems to always get his hands up to the top around his face, but maybe I'm not doing something right.  Yesterday was a great day... His morning nap was 2 hours, then a hour and twenty, and then two hours because he was in the car seat.  It was great weather so we went for a walk.  Then last night he woke up at 3:30 and I gave him the paci and held him for a minute and he slept until five. Then woke up at 8:15.  It was so nice to sleep!

[Archies mummy]

Yes that sounds great! I'm sure you're doing the swaddle me right, I know someone on here (can't remember who) threaded a blanket through the arm bit and put both ends under the baby so their weight trapped the arms!

[rngmom]

As for the swaddle me, I really have to make sure it's snug or he does get his hands out. I have a fleece one and a cotton one and he seems to get out of the fleece one a lot more. If you have the fleece you could always try the cotton one. I have a friend who swears by the miracle blanket, but I just didn't want to spend more money
I will need to look around the forums a bit more on paci's as a prop. He doesn't seem to wake once he has lost it, but I do use it to extend naps. Also, I try to just use it in the nursery and in the carseat. Once my husband gets home he tends to use outside of those areas, but that is also probably because evening napping is such a struggle!

[sgudza]

Today we went to the pediatrician and Samuel had already gained 4 pounds:) He's only six and half weeks, but I was worried if I have enough milk as he is bf, and apparently I do:) Can vaccines make babies sleepier?  He's been really cranky all day and it seems like he just wants to sleep even half an hour after he wakes, but I'm nervous to let him sleep all day.  I've been using the paci to help calm him before he goes to sleep but I take it out before he actually goes to sleep.  I always make sure and wait until he notices, and he looks for it and then calms down and goes to sleep. It also helps me extend naps. But I really try not to let him fall asleep with it. It's part of our wind down rountine. 

Today I was able to extend one of his naps to two hours. I did w2s, pressuring the jolts and he slept two hours.  This might have had something to do with the immunizations but I'd rather think it was thanks to me:) Thank you all for all your advice.  I feel more hopeful than I have in days!

Stephanie