Won't go to sleep without mommy or daddy's touch.

[~Mama Bug~]

My 18 month old used to go to sleep on her own no problem.  We would lay her down and she would play with her crib toys and then go to sleep.  For the past week or so she freaks out as soon as we walk towards the door. She will not go to sleep unless one of us are in there with her. When we walk in she will hand us her blanket and lay down, we lay the blanket over her and put a hand on her back. She will fall right to sleep.   

Why has she all of a sudden stopped going to sleep on her own?!?! We were doing so well!!

Any help pleeeeease?   

Thanks,
Kristen 

[louis-mummy]

Hi

Have you read my thread on here?! I totally sympathise ((hugs))

Who knows why this starts? well not me unfortunately.......

Do you have NW's or anything else, if not then i would guess that this won't be too hard to fix since it has only been happening for a week and she was so good at going to sleep before.

I recommend that you either do gradual withdrawal or WI/WO when she gets upset.  (i have a link on my post to help deciding which to do)
My LO hates WI/WO so i have been gradually reducing the amount of contact (prop) he has for example 'i will stay here in this chair til you go to sleep but i can't put my hand on you, you need to hug teddy instead'  It doesn't go down very well with LO and they will probably get a bit upset but as long as they know you are there and they're not being left to cry alone then they should accept it fairly quickly.
The idea then is that each night you move the chair nearer to the door til she learns to go to sleep on her own again.

HTH and you get things straight again soon

[jess, lukeys_mom]

Hi there,

I just popped on to say hello casue I saw it was you, Kristen, and thought "Oh how are they doing?' ;-)

Only have a quick second but just wanted to mention Luke also went through a period like this at 18 months. I guess it was separation anxiety. He was always the most independent, non-cuddly baby, and suddenly he wanted to hold hands ALL night long! We ended up bringing an extra mattress in there with him and took turns sleeping in there, and then gradually weaned it. It took a very long time though (maybe 6 weeks ish?!).  We have used WI/WO for other sleep probs in the past but this time it seemed that he really needed us there, so that's what we did.

Hope this helps and hope you are all doing well otherwise ;-) x

[~Mama Bug~]

Hi again Jess! We're doing pretty great here, hope things are the same for your adorable family

Thank you both for sharing your experiences with me.  As it stands now it's been about a week since she started the funny behavior. We've been doing her normal routine and then sitting in the chair by her bed reading for about ten minutes.  When the ten minutes are up I tuck her in, say goodnight and walk out. She cries for about a minute and then stops and plays until she falls asleep.  DH, however, sneaks out after ten minutes which drives me insane when she starts crying. I don't think it's good for her to look up where she expects her daddy to be and find the chair empty. She always cries harder at that time and I end up feeling so bad that I go in and hold her till she falls asleep.  Great bonding time for her and I but not good for the sleep situation.  Definitely something he and I need to figure out before this is going to get any better.

Aside from that though, I was thinking about trying the idea of moving the chair closer and cloaer to the door. I know the bigger problem will be when I transition from in the chair by the door to not in the room at all.  That or take my ten minutes of reading every nap/bedtime as a gift!!!!

I'll let you know how everything goes!

Thanks again,
Kristen

[jess, lukeys_mom]

that is what we did, slept in there for a little bit, and then we gradually got closer and closer to the door. it was not without tears though but at least we were there.  however, by the time we got right at the door, it was pretty much a non-issue and easy to go. i think i tried leaving his door opened and saying "mama will be right here" and sitting right outside but only had to do it for a night for about 5 minutes.  any NW after that we did WI/WO with success. xx

[~Mama Bug~]

Sorry it's taken so long to respond. Time is sparse anymore

We've taken to reading in the chair beside her bed (with a flashlight at night).  Naptime we stay till she falls asleep, bedtime she doesn't go to sleep as easily so we usually make the cutoff about twenty minutes.  Sometimes she's ok with us leaving at that point, othertimes she cries a bit and the plays and then there are the times that she flat out screams until we come back in. Those are the hard ones.

She's never been good with WI/WO.  She woke last night at 4:30am and bawled until I came in there. I was so tired I actually climbed in the crib with her in hopes she'd fall asleep. She didn't but eventually I got sick of laying cramped up and moved to the floor with my hand in the crib for reassurance. That finally worked but it wasn't so great. Still trying to figure out what to do about the NWs.  Shes teething so I feel bad   Any success with anything other than WI/WO?

Thanks as usual for all the help, support and advice

[jess, lukeys_mom]

hi kristen,
personally we did wi/wo with success a few times, and as mentioned at 18 months we were doing the gradual withdrawal method. we brought a mattress into luke's room and slept holding his hand. for a few days we stayed in all night, after that we went in during the nw's and would lie there. dh could sleep even if luke didn't so he would go in during the night to reassure him, and then would stay on the mattress and sleep, often with a hand in the crib. when we felt like the SA was over and there was no teething going on, we weaned it gradually as i mentioned aove. it did take quite a while though! don't know if this helps at all? xxx