I just don't know what to do. My DD is 17.5 months and will not go to sleep on her own for bed anymore. Our bedtime routine has become hours long and I have to rock her to sleep (ends up being 9:30 or so before she is asleep) and we have NWs too. Here's some background - it's long.
We are remodeling our kitchen/home. Finishing up now, but the house was chaos for 4 months. The 1st two weeks of June, she was teething a molar and it's always been very difficult for her. For naps and bedtime I would have to rock her because she was so miserable. The last two weeks of June, she and I moved out because of the remodeling. One week at my parents, one week at my in-laws. She hates sleeping other places i.e. I have to rock her. Finally came home and it was more of the same - me rocking. Well, I bribed her into playing with her toys for naps and, one day she fell asleep on her own and now does fine with going to sleep for naps. (Sometimes it's 1, sometimes it's 2 - I leave it up to her).
Bedtime is another story. It's horrible for both of us. Also, through all of this, I am still BFing, but only before bed. Her nights were so erratic (b/c of teething I think) that she was way OT. So she would take 2 long, good naps - but sometimes not wake until 5pm or so. She would seem so tired at her normal bedtime, but would take hours to actually fall asleep - all in my lap. I think the nursing is a huge part of the problem. It's all for comfort.
Our bedtime routine is
start dinner between 5:30-6:00
by 6:45 start bath
after bath, then prayers and bedtime story
then nurse
then bed.
Once the story is over, she starts crying and pulling up my shirt. She can't wait to start to nurse. She goes back and forth between sides and plays in between. Back in the good old days, she would nurse and sign to me she was finished and then I would put her in bed and she would go to sleep. Now I think she would nurse all night if I let her. I've tried to just let her go as long as she wants, but I can't seem to wait that long! Every time I ask if she is finished, she goes down to nurse again. Eventually, I just tell her it's bedtime and put my shirt down (this is probably > 1 hr after she started). She screams and pitches a fit! I get up and do our usual last little routine of saying good night to Mr. Sunshine and turning on her lullabies - now during this, she seems to stop crying about nursing, but starts to cry because I put her into bed. She points to our chair and is crying as I am putting her down. She is going crazy so I pick her up and go over to rock her (sometimes I leave the room before I go pick her up - doesn't seem to make a difference). She makes no attempts to nurse again. She just gets into her sleep position(s) and settles down to sleep in 30-40 min or so. (I think we are completely missing her sleep window - I think she would like to be asleep by 7:30 - back in the good ol' days that was her good bedtime)
She then wakes up 1-2 times at night where I have to rock her back to sleep. She was waking and staying awake for 1-2 hours with me - not playing or crying at all, just trying to go back to sleep. But, that part seems to be over. She goes back to sleep quickly. I am still in there for 1-2 hours though b/c her sleep seems so fitful. She flops all over the place and I am afraid to pick her up for fear of waking her. So, I wait until she is very soundly asleep before I pick her up.
So, I am very sleep deprived and don't know what to do. I don't know how much of this is teething or anything. Am wondering if I should just stop BFing cold turkey and see what happens (I am really ready to be done nursing - not sue she is though). I'll take any ideas that anyone has.
She is happy as a clam during the day!
