13 mos...wacky sleep has returned!

[babyboy26]

Hello everyone!  Mikey and I are back.  He will be 13 mos in a few days, and for the past couple of weeks, we have had some crazy sleep issues!  About 2 weeks ago, he started fighting the pm nap.  Not everyday, but some days.  My trouble is...wake up times and am nap lengths are never consistent!!!  Sometimes I can get a 2hr am nap, sometimes 1hr10m.  So, this leaves me with different A times between naps and before bed.  I am so hesitant to shorten the am nap, because that is the best nap I get, usually.  I feel like I am never guaranteed a good pm nap, so I'd rather keep the am nap long, but then the pm nap is always at different times, and the cycle continues.  Here is what the past few days were like, any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!!!

Tuesday:
6:55 wake
10:45-12:00 nap 1 (1hr15m)
3:30-4:40 nap 2 (1hr10m, woke after 25m, settled back within 10, and then I woke him to preserve bedtime)
7:45-6:55 bed (woke chatting from 6:15-6:30)

Wednesday:
6:55 wake
10:40-12:35 nap 1 (1hr55m, but woke twice, after the first 30m, and then after the second 30m.
4:05-4:40 nap 2 (fought this one!!!)
8:15-7:30 bed (put him down at 7:40, but he chatted until 8:15.  Woke from 3:30-4:00 chatting, then from 5:45-6:55 chatting.  Back to sleep until 7:30)  I assume this was UT due to too much day sleep or a nap too late???

Thursday:
7:30 wake
11:35-12:15 nap 1 (40 m...in car, as we had to be out)
2:35-4:10 nap 2 (a short a, I know, but I think he was really tired due to so much chatting the night before.  I woke him at 4:10.)
7:55-6:40 bed (put him down at 7:40, but chatted for 15m.)

[deckchariot]

It sounds like the 2 to 1 nap switch.  There are basically 2 approaches to the switch:
1) keep 1st nap at the same A time every day, but gradually shorten the length of it; at the same time, move pm nap earlier (by the same amount you shorten nap 1).  When nap 1 is <30 min, attempt to cut it out and just have 1 nap.
2) push morning A time later, allow your bub to sleep as long as they want in the am, then do a late pm catnap (can be a shorter A time than in the am, as you don't want them to take a full nap); eventually cut out pm catnap.

If he needs a longer A time before bed, then option #1 is generally better.  If he doesn't and HATES being woken from the am nap, option #2 may be better.  In both cases, you can offer an early bedtime if one/both of the naps is bad.

Whichever approach you choose - it's best to go gradually - so either cut 15 min off the am nap every 3-5 days or lengthen the am A time by 15 min every 3-5 days.  It also is helpful to know about how much day sleep is "optimal" for your ds and how much A time he needs (minimum) between his last nap and bedtime - that can help you plan out the day.

It sounds like he may do better with option #2 - that's what we did with our dd as her first nap was always her best and the pm one was hit or miss.

hth
michelle

[babyboy26]

Thanks, Michelle.  I knew he was starting the transition...I just didn't know how crazy it would be!  I was going the long am/short pm route, but things got sticky.  He seems to be more prone to OT in the morning than he is for bedtime.  Since he has been taking a while to fall asleep at night, I am thinking he needs a longer A before bed.  It's hard to figure out what his optimal day sleep is, since it is soooo different every day!

[babyboy26]

So, I decided to push his morning A from 3hr45m to 4hrs today, and see if that got me a longer am nap.  I am starting to think that maybe these EWs were due to him having too short of an A in the morning, and using that 1st nap as an extension of his night.  Anyway, wake was 7:20 today...that was after chatting from 5:00-5:15, and then again from 5:55 to 6:30.  Nap was at 11:20.  It is now 1:30, and he's still sleeping.  He actually woke briefly after 1hr20m, but settled himself after only about 3m.  So, this is a 2hr10m nap.  Now, I don't know what to do...whether I should wake him or not...whether I should offer a catnap or not!

[deckchariot]

I never woke Abby during the switch - that am nap was as long as she wanted.  Then in terms of the catnap....that depends on how he's doing.  With Abby, I knew she needed at least 3 - 3.5 hrs between last nap and bed, so if bedtime was 7:30, the latest I'd let her sleep was 5:30 - so I'd do a 4:30 catnap - and see if she'd sleep for 30 min or so.  If that was a no-go, I'd do bedtime at 7.  So, see how his afternoon goes and if he seems tired, then try a late catnap, if he doesn't seem tired, do either 30 min early bedtime or do regular bedtime.  Well done on extending the am A time!!!

[babyboy26]

So, here's what's been happening:
Saturday:
7:20 Wake
11:20-1:30 nap (2hrs 10m)
We were out and about that afternoon, so I thought he'd catch a cn in the car, but he didn't.  He managed fine, though!
7:45 - 8:05 (bed...he did wake from 5:15 to 5:45, and then from 6:55-7:10...I then woke him up at 8:05.  When he's waking
                   in these early morning hours, it's no crying, just chatting/playing)

Sunday
8:05 wake
12:00-1:55 nap (1hr55m)
Would not take a catnap...was a little fussy, but went outside for a while, and then managed fine until bedtime
7:45-7:20 bed (woke from 5:30 to 5:45 chatting, then back to sleep.  Heard a little murmur at 7, but then nothing until 7:20)

Today (so far)
7:20 wake
11:15-12:25 nap (only 1hr10m...woke up happily chatting and playing)  this was 5m less than 4hr A, but I always put him down 10m before I want him to be asleep, he drifted off within 5 m today.

So, I will def. have to offer a nap this afternoon...hope he doesn't fight it!

Since I have been doing the 4hrA for 3 days, I'm wondering if I should stick with it for another 2 days, or if I should increase to 4hr15m...what do you think?

[deckchariot]

For today's catnap, I'd try it around 4 or so - you want just a wee bit less A time than he has in the am, because it's only a catnap - you want a short nap, so that's why the shorter A time.  He seems to be handling things really, really well.  If he's not super sensitive to A time changes, and he seems to be handling the 4 hrs of A time fine, you can go ahead and increase it now if you want to.  If he tends to be pretty sensitive to A time changes, I'd wait a few more days then.  You look like you're off to a fabulous start on the switch!!  Well done!!!

[babyboy26]

So, he was asleep for the cn at 3:40...he was yawning and rubbing his eyes at 3:30, so I took the opportunity to put him down.  He woke whining at 4:05 for about 3 min...then silent for 5...then chatting for about 1 min...then silent for 5m...this continued until 4:30, when I went and got him up.  He was sleeping, so I don't know if he was just babbling in his sleep all that time or what!  Bad news, though, he was running a temperature when I got him up   I kept his A pretty low key until bedtime.  He went to sleep at 7:50, after meds.  He woke and chatted for about 2min at 8:40...then at 1:30, where he chatted until 1:40.  I wanted to go check his temp, so I went in at 1:45.  He was warm, so I gave more meds...but then that boy stayed up until 2:30...just chatting and playing in his crib.  He woke again chatting from 3:30-3:35.  Then from 6:00-6:05.  He is just now waking up at 7:45, although I have heard one or two quiet murmurs between 6:45 and now. 
I am guessing that the fever caused restless sleep???  Surely he wasn't UT, since his total nap time yesterday was a little less than 2 hrs? 

I am going to go get him so I can check his temperature.  I do not plan on increasing his A today!!!  May have to shorten it if he is still running a temperature and seems like he can't manage.

[babyboy26]

He was sick, poor thing!  Seemed better by yesterday afternoon.  His As have only been about 3 hrs the past 2 days, though.  He was in a pretty good mood this morning, so I was going to try for at least 3hr15m, but he was out by 3hr10m.  I've been getting very odd naps, due to illness, I'm sure.  Since this is a short A, I'm not expecting a long nap, so maybe we'll have a longer pm nap today. 

Since he has been on short As due to illness, do I gradually increase back up to 4hr morning A again?  We are still having NWs (happy chatty ones)...although I'm not sure if it's due to meds, illness, too short A before bed, etc.

[deckchariot]

{{{{{{hugs}}}}} on having a sick bub.  You are definitely doing the right thing by shortening his A time.  I usually found with my dd that I could immediately put her back to her pre-sick A time, I didn't have to do it gradually - but your guy may be different.  Once he's feeling better, see how he does with his A time and he may be able to go right back to 4 hrs.

[babyboy26]

He was definitely back to his old self by yesterday afternoon!  Yay!  Yesterday's routine actually worked out great! 

7:25 wake
10:35-12:05 nap 1 (1hr30m)
3:10-4:15 nap 2 (1hr5m)
Bed at 7:40...no NWs...this is the first time in probably about 2 weeks!  I did hear a little murmur at 7, then again at 7:15, 7:25, but was quiet in between.  Heard him again for about 2m at 7:45, then quiet again.  I went to get him at 7:55, and he looked like he just woke up!  So, I am guessing he was in a light sleep all that time.  Since I'm not EXACTLY sure what time he was up, I wasn't sure what time to put him down for nap this morning.  I wouldn't at all mind a day like yesterday...if it would stay like that!!!  I'm going to put him down at 11, and hope he'll be asleep by about 11:10...I think I may need to slowly extend his A again.  However, if I get another day/night like yesterday, I may just try and keep it there until something goes wacky again!

[deckchariot]

wonderful day!!!!  So glad he's feeling better   And yep, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it"

[babyboy26]

We had about 3 days where we had 1.5 am nap and 1hr pm nap.  The am nap has been 1hr the past 2 days, though.  I'm thinking that I might need to increase that A again.

[deckchariot]

I would do just 10-15 min and see what that does.

[babyboy26]

Today I did 15m, which was a 3.5A, and he slept for 2hrs...10:45-12:45, and I actually had to wake him up!  I am worried that I won't have time to get in a cn and have enough A before bed.  He has been having great nights on 3.5A before bed, but that was after a 1hr-1hr15m pm nap.  If he'll take a 30m cn, his A before bed should be less than normal, right?