Help routine not working! Short naps, frequent night wakings...

[SleeplessParent]

Hi I am the mother of a 7mos old babe. I don't know all the abbreviations on this site (I am new) so I will just speak plain. I started the easy routine ~3wks ago. Previously we used the Ferber (I know, I know) and it initially worked then she started waking in the night again and we found we couldn't do the progressive waiting approach. With Ferber she was sleeping 9pm-8am with a feed at 5am. She was easy to get back to sleep then. After acquiring a UTI (bladder infection) she started waking 3-5 times a night again and it wasn't working for us anymore.

Then I read the baby whisperer and started her on 4h EASY.
This is the routine I took from the book:
7am wake and BF
7:30 activity
8am solids breakfast
845-9am nap
11am bf
1130 activity
12pm solids lunch
1pm nap
3pm bf
330pm activity
4:30-5pm solids supper
5-6pm nap if tired
6:30 bath
7-7:30 bedtime (7pm if didnt have evening cat nap)
10:30 df (although she started waking at this time now, in anticipation for it?)
She took to the routine right away but my only issue was at night. At this time we still used a soother. She was waking all through the night 10+ and would cry, cry, cry for hours despite the pu/pd and calming. I had a bedtime routine with bath, story and calming time and she generally went down good at 7:30-7:45pm. Following the books advice I was weaning from night feeds too. This went on for 2 weeks with little change except that she had begun to nap for 1 1/2-2h twice a day and usually got 40min between 5-6pm. I was staying in the room with her (circumstances beyond my control) and was not at home during these two weeks. After getting exhausted I moved back to my home to keep trying.

At my home she slept in the crib in her own room so I didn't wake her with my movements. Desperate for some sleep I started feeding at 3-5am because it was hardest to put her back to sleep then. She slept well after that so I am thinking she is not ready to wean night feeds yet.  I weaned her from the soother 5 days ago thinking that might decrease the night wakings. It might have decreased the number of wakings a little, but it will take usually 1h+ to calm her in the middle of the night now. She has recently started cutting her nap times short (30-45min) or not napping at all. This is making her extremely OT and fussy throughout the day. She wakes up from these short naps grumpy and I am unable to extend them using pu/pd so far.

Help! I know this is long but I am not sure what I should do. It seems we are in a cycle of OT and I don't know how to get out without using AP. Today she cried for an hour during her nap so we took her for a car ride in desperation and she slept in her carseat for 1 1/2h. These last 2-3d she screams louder and really gutteral (more than she has ever done before) every time I put her down for a nap. The only time she goes down well is at 7pm bedtime.

What should I do? I am now feeding at 10pm, 2am and 5-7am because she has been sleeping for 3-4hours after feeding. Without feeding she slept at most 2h at a time.

Thanks! SleeplessParent

[bennysmama]

Hi there,

First of all, a hug to you!  We're having some sudden nightwaking-issues here (bleeeurgh) so I sympathise....

Anyway, I was looking at your routine and here's what popped out at me:  your morning A time is 1h45.  Have you tried extending a little?  What happened if you tried a first A time of 2hrs?  If you haven't tried, could you pop on an extra 10 or 15 mins? (extend gently -- 15 mins max at a time to avoid overtired and verrreee cranky bub).

Also, I can't help wondering about that nap between 5 and 6....  If I ever let DS sleep after 5pm, its a nice break for me but, ohhhhh man, do I pay for it later!!!    I vaguely remember reading something in the BWSAYP book about sleep post-5pm interfering with night sleep.   

My suggestion:  try a little 15 mins max extension on that morning A time and see what happens.  Hang in there, it DOES get better. 

[alethiaperry]

Your LO(little one) is 7mo.  When I read the BW (Baby Whisperer) book, I came accross the 4month+ bit and had my DS(darling son) on a routine that was too short for TOO long.  I had him on a four hour routine, but by six months, it needs to increase and by 7months, they'll be up to about 3 hours A (activity), 2 naps and no more catnap.  Also, once solids are established, you can drop the DF (dream feed).  The DF started causing NWs(Night wakings) for us too, and it wasn't very difficult to cut this out in fact.  I think you may find some of these night wakings starting to dissapear if you extend her As and get rid of the DF. There's a link under the FAQs in Activity that have the amount of A you can expect at certain ages.  I'll look for the link and post it for you.  If your DD(darling daughter) is used to 2 hours of A, you'll need to extend it by about 15 mins every few days and see how she does with it, or you may end up with OT(over-tired) and short naps and MORE NWs(night wakings)! 
Also, it's a tough transition from 3 naps to 2 and there may be a couple of weeks of early bedtimes (like 5:30 or 6!!!)... but once she can handle the 3 hours A, you'll be back to a bedtime of 7 or so.  It seems to me that she needs to be getting close to a routine that looks a little more like this.

7wake
10nap#1

11:30 wake
2:30 nap#2

4:00 wake
7:00 bed

you just fit the feeds in there where you can.  It's less of EASY and more of EAESY.  Hope that helps. 

OH- and re: dropping DF... It was easier than I thought.  I just went in there when DS woke (between 10-11pm... habitual waking) and fed 1/2 amount for 3 days... making sure I kept his AWAKE (not 1/2 asleep)... he would scream for about 30 seconds when I put him back in his crib without finishing the feed, but would go back to sleep and STTN.  On the fourth day, I just picked him up and laid him back down.  I did that a couple of more days and then he no longer woke for it. 
Hugs.  it will smooth out!