4.5 mth old not sleeping - help please!!!

[junemum]

Hi all,

I will try and be brief -

Really struggling with our 4.5 mth old DS and sleep.

Basically, goes down to bed easily in evening at around 7. Sleeps well till around 10.30 (this is his best period of the night). Dream feed around 11 or so. Back to bed, sleeps till around 2/2.30. Wakes up at this stage, we go back in to him and pat shush him back to sleep. This then continues 2, 3,4, even 5 times until around 4.30/5 am. Each time we go into him and pat shush him back to sleep. We have tried winding him but it doesnt seem to be the problem. He doesnt seem hungry either as sometimes he will sleep again for an hour (presumably hunger would wake him). Usually though by 4.30/5 he is hungry and I feed him. Back down to bed again around 5.30ish, sometimes settles well, sometimes back to the same lark again of going in and out to him at 20 min/30 min intervals to get him back to sleep.

Any ideas??? We are exhausted!!! He did have a soother but we are successfully weaning him off it as it was definitely a prop for him. He goes down in his own cot, and usually settles easily enough the first time. Good daytime/bedtime routine, he is a great baby by day !! He was breast fed but is now on formula feeds. I really dont think it is hunger because sometimes he is capable for sleeping for longer stretches without waking. I see some people suggest the dream feed interferes with the nights sleep? Any thoughts on that? Or has anyone ANY suggestions??? We are really struggling. Thanks ! 

[Tweakster]

Hi there, hang in there.  Can we see your whole EASY in EAS format - if he is napping well etc. it may be that he is ready for more A time.  They sometimes try to get it at night.  The first part of the night is deep sleep so it's not uncommon that would be his best time...and then it's a lot of REM after that where they cycle a lot so he is probably unable to transition well for some reason.  Would be good if we can see overall picture from wakeup to bedtime to be able to help a bit more :-)

[Buga]

Hi!

No advice, but I have {{hugs}} for you!  Your post is similar to what we're going through right now (just posted our long saga!) and know how tough it is.

You mentioned 'winding' ... what is that?

Best of luck... I'll check back to see what advice you might get.

Lynn

[junemum]

Thanks for the replies.

Our EASY schedule looks something like:
7.00 am up
7.15/7.30 E
7.45 - 9.30 A
9.30 - 10.15 sleep ( this nap is ALWAYS only 45 mins. I could set my clock by him)

10.30 - E
10.45/11.00 - A
12.30- S ( this sleep varies. sometimes it is short about 50 mins, usually it is about an hour but rarely any longer)

13. 15/13.30 - E
13.45/14.00 - A
15.45 - S ( often a catnap when we are out. it is sometimes later than this depending on what we are doing. usually about an hour)

16. 30  - Short activity, playing on couch, playgym etc. A feed at around now if it is 3 hours since last one (rarely stretches feeds much more than 3 and quarter hours). In last few days he has stretched out till later, so ends up sometimes skipping this feed and just getting a bigger one at bed time.

17.30 - A like baby massage, quiet time. Followed by bath, nappy free time. Start settling for bed around 18.15 or thereabouts.
Sit quietly on chair in bedroom, dim light, beside cot. Usually have to pat shush for around 10 mins before goes asleep.
Nearly always asleep by 7.
Thanks guys !

[luv2swimbikerun]

HI

My only suggestion is to try to get him on the 4 hour EASY since he is 4.5 mos old.
My boy did the same as yours and my ped told me to start him on solids, which we did and he was almost 5 mos old at that time, because he was waking due to hunger.

And now he's 6 mos old and is at last sleeping through the night.Something to think about!

Lots of hugs, I feel your pain.  I'm a single parent and have had no one help me through the rough times. So I know, as we all do, how awful it can be!

Viviana

[~Sara~]

I think it might be because he's overtired by the time bedtime rolls around.  Have you tried to extend his naps?

The average A time for a 4.5 month old is about 2 hours.  Have you tried scaling back his A times from 2.5 hours?  Or, if he's on the high side of A time, have you tried 2.25 hours (that's where my DS is right now at almost 5 months).  A time is from when he wakes up to when he goes down for a nap.

I think a combination of tweaking the A times and extending his naps will help with the night wakings (and everything else in general).  Also, this should help with extending those feeds, too, as formula fed babies normally can go 4 hours between feeds.  I know that when we were having problems with DS's naps being short, he would wake up cranky and fussy and wanted to soothe himself with eating (though he wasn't *really* hungry).

If none of that sounds right to you, then it possibly could be the DF messing with his biorhythm.  Have you tried dropping it and just letting him wake up during the night when he's hungry (really shouldn't be more than, say, once after bedtime)?