Author Topic: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment  (Read 1666 times)

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Offline *Jo*

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lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« on: November 04, 2009, 01:46:00 am »
sometimes Caleb will nearly skip a whole meal and i dotn worry too much however i have started noticing that he really likes to skip a meal in favour of something like yoghurt or pureed fruit, i dont want to keep offering these if hes going to try and miss his vegies for them but im worried if he doesnt eat a meal he will wake throughout the night in hunger.
today he ate not alot of his oats for breakfast, i tried to give him vegies and meat for lunch and he flatly refused it, offered a sandwhich, he refused it, offered pureed apple and he smiled a very sly cheeky smile and opened up wide for it! hes eaten vegies and meat etc before fine so i know its not a texture issue, he is teething at the moment, hasnt seemed to affected his bottles, he downs 270mls (9 oz) 3x a day. he did the same thing yesterday at lunch until i gave in and gave him mango yoghurt and he didnt eat that much dinner. he really hates any type of fruit i give him as well ,he refuses banana, apple, watermelon, pears, strawberries, mango and i have offered these numerous amounts of times he just wont eat them, the only fruit he will eat is pureed apple or pears and also banana only if its mixed in with something else.

Is there anything else i can do to encourage him to take his lunch and fruits?





Offline *jazzberry*

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2009, 09:11:43 am »
I'm sure others will have far more useful advice than me but just wanted to say that for me NOTHING would make DS1 eat lunch if he didn't want to... he pretty much never has, and still doesn't! I still worry about it somewhere at the back of my mind, but after 2 and a half years he has never woken up hungry in the night, is full of energy, and is just for the first time starting to try a few new fruits.. Hope this eases your mind a bit x

Offline Mashi

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #2 on: November 04, 2009, 10:40:28 am »
I know you will have heard this before, but at this age it is his milk that is providing most of his nutrients and calories, not his solids, so as long as he is getting the required amount of milk in a day as well as a bit of solid food he is fine. 27 ounces of milk is fantastic for his age, I am pretty sure the suggested required amount is 20-24 ounces, so he is not lacking in his formula. Personally (and I know there are LOADS who would disagree with me but this is my personal opinion!) toddlers do not wake out of hunger unless they are used to getting fed in the night. So if he were to have a low food intake one day and he woke that night, rather than assume it was pain, routine, too hot, too cold, etc, a parent assumes it is hunger simply because he didn't eat well that day, offers milk in the night and slowly this becomes habit. But a day or two of not eating a whole lot of solids at meal times is not going to cause a hunger wake up, IMHO!!

I would also advise "start as you mean to go on" applies with solids as well - make him his meal, offer it to him, and if he does not want it then that is that. So you say you made him meat and veggies and he refused, so you made a sandwich and he refused and so then did up what he really wanted....unless you plan on doing this at all of his meals for the next x years, then I would stop now!  It is so easy to fall into the habit of it but at this age not only is eating about learning textures (what does it feel like if i squeeze this banana and then smear it on my tray? mmmm funny!) but also in learning how mealtimes work (what happens if I don't eat this...oh, mama goes and makes me something else, neato!)

To get around the problem of not wanting him to realise I was offering many alternatives, I would make sure the meal included something that I knew he liked and would eat as his true "meal" and a second course of a fruit or something that I knew he loved. I would put BOTH on the table and if he did not want to eat the main meal then he could have his fruit, but it was like making it clear at the beginning that this entire thing was a meal, not that I was offering the second because he would not eat the first.  Often getting stuck into the second course of fruit he would eat a few bits of the main meal as well, not realising what he was doing.

If he is teething it could also be that the cool applesauce is one thing that makes his gums feel better, or just that it doesn't irritate them as other foods do.  You can try using the applesauce as a dip for veggies...some streamed cauliflower dipped in applesauce for instance. He may only lick the applesauce off, but it is still exposure to the other.

If this is only happening at lunch, it could also be that he is not hungry for lunch at the time you are offering it. If he has had a large milk feed or snack relatively close to his lunch he may just not be hungry...but yet willing to eat the applesauce because it is a favourite! (I often tell DH I am not hungry until he brings out a bowl of ice cream, but I am more than willing to eat it!)  What does his feeding routine look like?



Offline *Jo*

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #3 on: November 04, 2009, 11:00:36 am »
well tonight for dinner i reheated what he refused for lunch and he refused it again, he was waaaaaay OT after not going to sleep for his second nap till an hour later than normal and then only sleeping 40mins so i put him in his highchair and he jsut cried (he was like this the whole evening) he refused the meat and vegies so i brought the highchair into the lounge, put on the wiggles DVD and he ate the lot! I have never done this before and probably wont do it again, it was just a special circumstance cos he was so tired and upset all evening, but i was surprised he ate his meal, i then gave him mango yoghurt for dessert (i had already brought that out at the beginning)

at the moment his feeds are like this:

6.30/7am wake up and 30mins later he has a bottle 9oz
1.5 hours later breakfast of 5Tbsp oats with soy milk, sometimes gluten free pancakes and toast
nap at 10/10.30 for an hour
snack of baby rice cake and small amount of cheeriosn usually around 11.30
12.30 lunch of meat and vege or some fruity meal. yoghurt instead usually 5Tbsp (I do offer fruit peices here of banana or apple but he just throws them over the side)
2pm Bottle 9oz
nap 2
if its early i will give him a handful of cheerios and a baby apple rice cake for a snack
5/5.30 dinner meat and vege, chicken,avocado, pasta, rice, potato, carrots, silverbeet, peas (doesnt like peas much) etc, that kind of stuff
bedtime 7.30/8pm bottle 9oz

he literally sucks his bottles dry, i cant fit anymore into his bottle though so i cant give him more!

whenever i give him new foods i do the sign for eat and he then puts it to his mouth, but more than usual before he even gets it into his mouth he screws up his face and drops it over the side, so he hasnt even tasted it yet and hes decided he doesnt like it. he especially does this with fruit. I even mashed up a banana last week, he took the first bite, screwed up his face and refused the rest of it. yet he eats it in his oats and has even once when he was 6 months old sucked on a banana and seemed to really like it, im so confused! :)

I will definately do what you suggested mashi, just offer the one type (or bring out two foods at the one time) and offer no more, i just dont also want him to be waking up early from naps being hungry as well






Offline Mashi

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #4 on: November 04, 2009, 11:13:54 am »
well tonight for dinner i reheated what he refused for lunch and he refused it again, he was waaaaaay OT after not going to sleep for his second nap till an hour later than normal and then only sleeping 40mins so i put him in his highchair and he jsut cried (he was like this the whole evening) he refused the meat and vegies so i brought the highchair into the lounge, put on the wiggles DVD and he ate the lot! I have never done this before and probably wont do it again, it was just a special circumstance cos he was so tired and upset all evening, but i was surprised he ate his meal, i then gave him mango yoghurt for dessert (i had already brought that out at the beginning)

It is totally normal for LOs to not want to eat if they are too tired! In these cases we always sacfrificed a "proper" meal for milk and early bed....perhaps a bit of fruit or snacky something while cuddling on my lap but never in the highchair as it was just too much for him to handle!

at the moment his feeds are like this:

6.30/7am wake up and 30mins later he has a bottle 9oz
1.5 hours later breakfast of 5Tbsp oats with soy milk, sometimes gluten free pancakes and toast
nap at 10/10.30 for an hour
snack of baby rice cake and small amount of cheeriosn usually around 11.30
12.30 lunch of meat and vege or some fruity meal. yoghurt instead usually 5Tbsp (I do offer fruit peices here of banana or apple but he just throws them over the side)
2pm Bottle 9oz
nap 2
if its early i will give him a handful of cheerios and a baby apple rice cake for a snack
5/5.30 dinner meat and vege, chicken,avocado, pasta, rice, potato, carrots, silverbeet, peas (doesnt like peas much) etc, that kind of stuff
bedtime 7.30/8pm bottle 9oz

he literally sucks his bottles dry, i cant fit anymore into his bottle though so i cant give him more!

And at this age, I wouldn't be pushing for any more milk, he is definitely getting his needed amount and if you give TOO much then he won't have an appetite for solids. As milk gives the nutrition he does still need to have some experience of eating solids, developing tastebuds, textures, and so on!

Looking at your routine I would not say that he is lacking in food amounts!  5Tbsp of oats for breakfast to me sounds like a LOT, I used to give DS 3Tbsp (measured dry, before cooked with milk) and it was a large bowl for a child his age!  Plus with the calories that the soy milk provides and that is a good heavy meal. So if he eats half of that serving, I would say that is great!  If you are trying to increase his fruit intake, mixing some in with the oats is a great place to get it in - mushy mango swirled in went over very well in our house!


Oh - and I also think same for the yogurt as the oatmeal...5Tbsp is a large-ish serving for a 9 month old, he could be full from that and just not want any more food, kwim?

whenever i give him new foods i do the sign for eat and he then puts it to his mouth, but more than usual before he even gets it into his mouth he screws up his face and drops it over the side, so he hasnt even tasted it yet and hes decided he doesnt like it. he especially does this with fruit. I even mashed up a banana last week, he took the first bite, screwed up his face and refused the rest of it. yet he eats it in his oats and has even once when he was 6 months old sucked on a banana and seemed to really like it, im so confused! :)

Normal!!!   ;)  And normal for various reasons....and it could be any or all of these!  But, think about if you never ever had any idea what was coming up for a meal. You were hungry, you were escorted to the dinner table dreaming of steak and potatoes and instead there was a roast chicken dinner in front of you.  Hmmph...roast chicken may be nice and all, but not what you had in mind. Maybe give it a sniff, a taste, but naaahh, I'll wait until the next meal and see if I get my steak!    Not much you can really do about it at this age, because he can't tell you what he wants, and because you don't want to go rooting through the fridge offering him every food in the world until you hit the bingo...so in that sense, it's sort of something you BOTH have to plod through with -- you offering a variety of foods, him learning that he should give them a taste and so on.  It's all just part of the game for both of you! 

The throwing food over the side is also learning, as frustrating as it is. My DS still does it...his two favourites are to pick up sweet corn, one kernel at a time and plonk it on the floor, watching as it falls; and sweeping his hand across a tray full of peas and seeing them fly around the kitchen.  One book I have describes this as a "budding scientist" -- he's learning that when he throws things, they don't go to the ceiling, they go to the floor - cool, let's try that again and see if the same thing happens!  And he's also learning that mommy makes an angry face when he does that...cool, let's try that again and see if this time she finds it funny.  ::)  So, I try not to react, I also try not to pick it up in front of him or it becomes another scientific experiment -cool, I throw it and mommy picks it up, just like when we are playing blocks in the living room.  KWIM?

Tastebuds and texture preferences also change....often hourly it seems.  DS has despised carrots from the time he was 6 months old.  Doesn't even like the squeeze of them in his fingers!  I still offered them maybe once per week..just one wee baby carrot on his tray, many a day the sight of it was enough to put him so off of his meal that he would not even eat what he was loving a moment earlier. Then one day last week I opened a tin of mixed carrots and peas, fished the peas out for him, but he screamed his head off pointing to the carrots trying to get at them. Ate ALL of them. Cried for more.   ::) Since then, carrots it is.  Bananas were another hit or miss...could love it and eat it all, next day it was more fun to use it as a hair product.  I just always said "ok, you don't have to eat it, mommy will!" Ate it in front of him to show him that it was good. and went on calmly.

With the dropping it before tasting, maybe he remembers the colour....didn't like that green thing she gave me yesterday, not eating green things again!  Keep offering, in a lighthearted mood, he'll eventually get past it!

I will definately do what you suggested mashi, just offer the one type (or bring out two foods at the one time) and offer no more, i just don't also want him to be waking up early from naps being hungry as well

i worried about this with naps at that age, and now that we are moving to one nap right over lunch time I worry with that as well! I try then to make sure what he is getting is nice and filling and not something to cause indigestion. Protein is good for filling tummies and making you feel full for longer...and that bottle of 9oz of milk before his nap is a good one to sustain him for at least a 2 hour nap!!  And, the oats at bkfst another good one.

9-10 months really was a trying phase for us, foods wise.  I may sound like I am suggesting this is all sooooooo easy, but I am the one who threw an entire bowl of pasta with tomato sauce across the kitchen because DS wouldn't even open his mouth to taste it, despite the fact that he had never tried it to know he didn't like it  :-[  Then spent an hour consoling an upset toddler and three weeks scrubbing my walls clean.   :-[ :-[ :-[   But I do know that EVERY phase we went through with solids was SO much easier when I took the above advice of my own and followed it.  Calm, easygoing, not worrying about how much he eats, offering healthy nutritional foods in appropriate amounts and remembering that it is an innate human trait to control how much food we eat, and to only eat what is needed to fill us up.

Hope some of this has helped??? Let me know how you get on  :-*
« Last Edit: November 04, 2009, 12:12:28 pm by mashimaro »

Offline *Jo*

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #5 on: November 04, 2009, 11:27:39 am »
Thanks I realy appreciate this advice!





Offline Mashi

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #6 on: November 04, 2009, 12:14:11 pm »
Hey Jo, got DS to stay asleep so instead of reposting a new message to finish I just went in and edited my old one to add the rest of what I was wanting to say! Hope at least some of it is helpful!

Offline *Jo*

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #7 on: November 04, 2009, 20:55:00 pm »
thanks Mashi, you made me laugh with your budding scientist! hahaha, i will definatley try to be more light hearted about it etc, now that i know hes getting plenty of milk i wont worry too much about that, so if he does, say, skip dinner, i should just not worry about it? perhaps just offer him a small snack an hour later of a rice cake or something?

another thing, what do you think about how far apart i feed him solids from bottle etc? i choose an hour and a half apart, so 1st bottle then an hour and a half later solids, i see some people feeding half an hour to an hour after their bottle, should i not make it so far apart?





Offline Mashi

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #8 on: November 04, 2009, 21:13:49 pm »
another thing, what do you think about how far apart i feed him solids from bottle etc? i choose an hour and a half apart, so 1st bottle then an hour and a half later solids, i see some people feeding half an hour to an hour after their bottle, should i not make it so far apart?

Sorry, I meant to comment on this as well but forgot when I finished off my post. The only one thing I can see is that maybe the snack at 1130 is cutting his lunch short. I mean if it is only rice cake or cheerios it's not like he is really getting that much out of it and "filling" but I often found that the actual act of eating was enough to make my DS not want too much lunch, no matter how little he consumed at that snack.  So if you think he is hungry when he wakes from his nap you could just move lunch to 1200 rather than snack at 1130 and lunch at 1230. Or, lunch at 1130 for that matter!

For timings after milk, at about 8 months or so I stopped paying so much attention to the amount of time after a bottle.  As in, we did morning milk and then nappy, dressed, etc etc etc and then breakfast...if that was 45 minutes or 1hr15 minutes, it made no difference to me, really...I don't see anything wrong with what you are doing!   I did solids before milk at lunch time as you do, lunch first and then a bottle before nap time, just because it worked best for us. And the same with evening - dinner and then milk before bed. I think it's fine. If it is too close he won't eat, if it is too far he'll be screaming hungry!  I personally say he is at an age where you can feed him when he's hungry and if that is right after his bottle then fine, and if that is not until 20 minutes later than normal then fine! 

For skipping dinner, well, that is what I did!  Like I say he never woke hungry but I know that he ate well in the rest of the day so I didn't worry. Now, if he refused bkfst, lunch, snacks and didn't have much milk, I would worry (mainly worry he was ill!) but I think it would be odd for him to wake hungry just from missing a couple oz of food at dinner, kwim?

Offline *Jo*

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Re: lunch and fruits a no go at the moment
« Reply #9 on: November 04, 2009, 21:19:39 pm »
ahhhhh i feel so much better about what im doing now, thanks Mashi!!!! Im about to give him breaky so it will be oats with some pears in there, i will offer him the 5Tbs (he doesnt always eat all of it) and not stress about snacks too much, especially if he eats the full 5Tbs!