Dinner time nightmare...

[Mum of PA]

Hi there

Up until 2 weeks ago my 19 month old was a fantastic eater (the only thing she wont eat is fruit that isn't pureed, but we have been working on this and she will now eat some bananna, pear and apple), but the last little while has been really difficult trying to get her to eat her dinner - she point blank refuses to eat it.  It is not just the vegetables (which she used to devour) she is refusing to eat. She only seems to want pureed fruit or yoghurt.   Breakfast and lunch are fine but this is because these meals are traditionally not meat, veges etc.

This began when she was teething (I know it is early but she only has her 2 year molars to come through and I know they can take months, she had terrible nappy rash, a very red cheek, was biting everything in sight and was really miserable so I think they are at least beginning to bother her), but this refusual has continued.  I was worried she wasn't eating so 'gave in' and fed her fruit/yoghurt (she gets very constipated even when she was eating well, so I was worried her not eating would make it worse).  Now she just points to her fruit and wants that. 

I have seen some very helpful threads on here which I will read (eg support thread for picky eaters, hiding veges etc) but in the meantime my question is, if she will not eat her dinner should I leave at that or should I at least feed her some pureed fruit ?  I am just a bit worried that she will expect this going forward and she will never eat like she used too.

Thanks for your advice.

[mmom]

My LO is younger than yours, but dinner has been the most difficult time for us for a while now.   I always do something nontraditional that I know he will eat: pb&j, oatmeal with yogurt, etc.   He is not as hungry at this time and if i give him meat and veggies, he won't touch them.  Instead, I sometimes give him turkey, quinoa, and veggies in the morning.  I realize that sounds gross to us, but it is the time of day he is most hungry and willing to eat.  It has eliminated our dinner fights and my worry of him being hungry, because he always eats his comfort food.

[Mashi]

STRONGLY agree with above - was what i was going to suggest myself!  At this age most LOs are getting the large majority of their nutritional / caloric needs met in their breakfast, lunch and snacks, and thus by dinner they are just truly NOT that hungry.  We got around it for a long time by giving DS some veggies for his morning snack and a more hearty meal for lunch. Afternoon snack was again some more veggies and by dinner when all he wanted was toast and a bit of banana, it didn't bother me because he'd had a good meal at lunch. I've gotten out of the habit lately due to nothing but laziness and I am noticing more battles at meal times again - so I know that I really need to get back to preparing a hot meal for him for lunch....leftovers from our dinner the night before is probably the best way to save myself some time with cooking for him at lunch!

[Mum of PA]

Hello again

Just need a wee bit more advice please.....

For the last 3 days I have tried to give her her 'dinner meal' at lunch time and she is still not having a bar of it.  She is point blank refusing to even touch it.  I tried her absolute favourites - spagetti bol with the veges cut up so small they just about vanish into the meal (!) and vege ravioli with tomato sauce - and no way would she even touch them.  She looks at it and bursts out crying.

I tried some steamed fish, potato and cauliflower gratin (another favourite) last night as she didn't eat her lunch and she ate the fish and potato (yay) but left the veges.

It is getting really, really frustrating.  I am just not sure what to do when she refuses to eat her 'dinner meal' at lunch time, knowing she will then also refuse it at dinner time as well.  Any suggestions?  Should I just feed her what I know she will eat - sandwiches, crackers with cheese, yoghurt, pureed fruit at one of the meals and if doesn't eat her 'dinner meal' should I just leave it at that ie no meal?

Thanks so much again.

[Mashi]

That is what I would do!  Include one thing that you know she WILL eat along with her dinner time, and offer her the other items (ie/ what you are having/making) on her tray but don't push her to eat them.  One of these days....she will!

[Mum of PA]

Thanks so much for this - will keep persevering.