EASY bedtime routine has become difficult! Please HElP!

[adinawollner]

Hi, I am a mom of twin age two Asher and Yardena. They have been on the EASY routine since they were four month and with the exception of sickness, new routine, growth spurt, and new development stages, they adjusted well into falling asleep using the PU/PD method.

The past 5 1/2 months have been a living nightmare. First Yardena figured out to climb our of her crib, and she could not go to sleep until 11 at night for a month. Now Asher has been the climber for the past six weeks.

Bed time routine is as follows-
715 Wind down starts, change the babies, and brush teeth
730 Snuggle time in day beds, read, and sing.
8 Turns off ligth, leaves hall light on, and kisses good night

Actual times babies fall asleep- 930-10pm, and thats on a good night!

We have tried everything. We shortened their one nap from 3 hours to to two hours, then to an hour and a half. Didn't work.
We tried moving their nap 2-330 to 1-230 or 130-3. Didn't work.
We tried eliminating naps. They can't go without a nap, too exhausted. Didn't work.
We tried staying in the room with them until they fall asleep. Some night they pass out around 830 or 845 but thats only if one of them skipped their nap. Usually they dont pass it out anyways till 930.

I work pt and I go to school pt. I need my night to study.

Also its seems that they are back to night waking! They are still on pacis, but they have them in their mouths when they are at their bedroom gate, and its always 4 am or 6 am.

Please someone help me. My patience is non existent, and my husband has beeen working out of town doing consulting jobs. I really can't handle this.
Get back to me as soon as you can.
Thanks.
Adina

[becky1969]

It sounds like the trouble started at 18 months or so?  Did that coincide with when they got their canine teeth?

Has it been awful the entire 5.5 months, or were there weeks when things were OK?

I'm wondering if molars are starting to come in at this point.  Are there any signs of teeth?

Do they share a room?

can you show me what the rest of their day is like? In other words, what time they wake, what time nap is (and for how long)?


Then we'll see if anything pops out at me!

[adinawollner]

The issues began around 18 months when Yardena discovered her acrobatic talents. Asher followed suits.
Their routine as to date-

6:45-7:45 Wake Up
7:45-9 Play (Building, Playdo, Mr. Potato, Coloring, Reading, Leap Tag Junior, Ball Activites etc. or watch some Elmo ( I try not to let them watch it in the morning, but with these rough nights I need some time to wake up myself)
9-930 Breakfast
930-12 Activity time Good Weather Days :Outside, Playground, Park, Pushing Stroller/Car Bade Weather Days: Same activites as before breakfast, but with some differnt variations. Also they have been having more various activites during this play time.
Snack time is around 11 which consits of of one type of cracker, one type of fruit, and water
12-1220 Lunch
12:30ish-1:30 ish Nap
2-5 Same Activites as the morning depending on the weather
5-545 Good Weather: I take them out to play Bad Weather: Funtime in their room from Mommy when I come home
6-630 Dinner
630-7 Dancing and then Winding Down which includes Book Story Time
7 Milk and more relaxing time till 730
(Some nights include baths at this point)
730 8 Jammies, Singing, Ligths out
Update
Since we have been wearing them out in the evenings, and giving them an early nap time Sunday night they were out by 830, so I was only in there for a half hour, and yesterday Yardena napped from 1250 to 150 and asher fnapped 130-230, but both fell asleep by 830. I also noticed today that his last molers are in, they both have 16th teeth, and the back molers just started coming in. But Asher woke up numerous times last night getting out of his crib, crying at the gate, and wanting to play at 1 am, 4 am, and 530 am. Thanks goodness he went to bed.

I am making impovement so far getting closer to the door, and having to be in the room longer with them, I certainly think it has to do with their physical activity and nap time for sure.

Kepp me posted.

[becky1969]

I'm actually wondering if we move nap a bit later if they won't sleep longer! Have they always only napped 1 hour since being on 1 nap? Or has it slowly gotten shorter?

And do they share a room?  If they share a room that can be a problem with toddlers can they wind each other up, LOL! So even if one is kind of sleepy, the other will get silly and soon BOTH are silly.


Bedtime may also be too late.  A lot of toddlers need their shortest A before bedtime because they are so wiped out by all their toddler activities and emotions.  I think rather than aiming to have lights out at 8, I'd aim to have lights out at 7:30.  You may find that they find it easier to fall asleep then.

Also, be careful about prolonging wind down.  You look like you basically have an hour from when wind down starts until lights out?  That is too long.  Sometimes when you have a long wind down toddlers just want to prolong their time with you.  If you make it about 30 min, then it's short & sweet and toddlers feel like prolonging isn't an option.  See what I mean?


Does any of this make sense to you?

[adinawollner]

When they moved to one nap, they slept two 1/2 hours-3hours. We purposely wakeup them after one hour because if we left them sleep that long, they stay up until 1030.

They have been doing this with their bedtime routine since they could climb out of their cribs. Last night after laying down for a half hour, they came out of their beds, played in their room until 915, Asher went back into bed and Yardena ended up falling asleep on our folded stroller.

We have tried door closed, hall light on, hall light off, low music, fresh air. Also, we have been in their room now with them, sitting quietly now for almost a month.

Did I mention I have no hair left from ripping it out??! 

We are in a two bedroom, so there is no option to seperate them. I am in school now and I go run in the evenings, I need my nights back. My husband was thinking we should wake them up at 6, then they'd nap at 12, and go to bed 630 seven, but then we have to be in bed by 10.

I really appreciate all your help.

[becky1969]

You may have limited their nap too soon.  The difficulty falling asleep until 10:30 when they napped long may not have been due to being UT.  Also, there's a big difference between a 3 hour nap and a 1 hour nap! I think I would have limited to 2 hours first, and then maybe to 90 minutes if that didn't improve things.  Just helped another mama with a LO this age who limited nap to an hour, and once we let LO sleep as long as he wanted bedtime drama disappeared! As did NWs/EWs.

I suspect you started seeing trouble around 18 months which is when those canines usually start to appear.  They were probably MORE tired than usual due to teething, but because they were up and playing you thought they were UT, so you limited their nap.  Obviously limiting the nap didn't work b/c it's been crazy for the last 5 1/2 months, right?  So let's go back to letting them nap as long as they want.  Then we'll work on proper bedtime timing from there!  Most likely 4.5-5 hours post nap should work.



Also, if they are climbing out of cribs it is time for big kid beds! Climbing out is dangerous, and also absolutely to be expected at this age.  Put them in big kid beds and see how that works as well.


I think you have two VERY OT kids on your hands!