17 mo takes a long time to fall asleep

[~*Nicole*~]

For the majority of the time...for the past two weeks or so...DD has been taking a long time to fall asleep for both naps and night. She babbles and talks for a long while rather than falling asleep. As a result a couple of times she has gotten worked up and likely OT and needed some extra cuddles. But whether she needs me or not she is taking so long to settle I feel like her sleep is getting cut back and she's not getting enough.

Anyone else having this problem?

Usual day:
6:30-7:15-wakes between these times usually
12:30/1:00-nap for about 2 hours
7:30/8:00-bedtime (5 hrs. after waking approx--was working really well for a good while)

I have tried putting her down for a nap earlier, but she just babbles until later. Often she won't fall asleep until 1:15 and sleeps until 3:15. Later naps end up on later wake times so I can see she wants a certain amount of A time before the nap before she's tired enough to sleep.

If I put her to bed at 7:30 or 8:00 she has been taking nearly a half an hour...sometimes longer....to fall asleep. Just seems like something is off. I tried 7:00 and she did the same thing and then ended up overtired and yelling for me around 8:30 and I had to go help her and she was awake until almost 9:00!

Should I cut her nap like some of you other moms have done to get bedtime a bit earlier? Or does anyone think this is some type of low-level OT creeping in and if so what do I try to do then?

Thanks!

[becky1969]

I would NOT suggest cutting nap.

What I think is happening is you're running smack into the 18 month crazies.  It's not *entirely* clear what causes them, but I think the canines are a big part of it.  If those teeth aren't peeking out yet, chances are you'll start to see them coming in pretty soon. 

The canines are the most evil teeth of all and the symptoms begin long before the teeth really show up.  It makes lots of toddlers more tired than usual.  So I would probably make nap AND bedtime about 30 minutes earlier than normal.  I think she's OT.

Try that for 2-3 days and let me know what happens! We'll tweak from there.

[~*Nicole*~]

We've already got all the canines!

But I AM leaning towards OT. I am going to suggest DH put her down for her nap earlier the next few days and also work on bedtime earlier and will report back.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

The canines are the most evil teeth of all and the symptoms begin long before the teeth really show up. 

That is so right!!! Spencer's canines have been bothering her off and on for months (thankfully only 3 to go, she's had one of them since she was 6 months old!) I find Spencer does alot of chatting to herself lately, more so on days where we have done something off our normal routine (friends over, new toy, using the potty!) I always kick myself that I didn't put her down sooner, because I do think it would help. Plus, I swear every time I look at her she is taller!

[~*Nicole*~]

I also meant to ask....should I cap her nap at any amount of time. (for example....I found a few nights ago or so she had late bedtimes for various reasons and the following day she did nap longer than usual...12:30-3:00ish...but then she was going to bed late those nights b/c she had gotten such a good long/late nap-just weird days--not the norm) So just wondering if at her age daytime sleep should be capped at any amount to preserve bedtime?

Last question...I've tried putting her down around 12 and she often stays awake until 12:30 or later....should I put her down even earlier and hope for her to  be asleep around 12 or just stick with 12 for a good few days and hope she adjusts to falling asleep sooner?

[becky1969]

I wouldn't cap her sleep.  We don't typically have to do that until after age and usually closer to 2.5 or 3.   NOt saying that may not be an option! but it will probably be our last resort.  She's *so* new to 1 nap, that I doubt getting too much daytime sleep is her problem.  It's more likely that she's OT on the newish routine.

I'd put her down earlier so that hopefully she's asleep by 12.

[~*Nicole*~]

Well of course...it snowed so my DH was called in to work and I had to bring her to my mom's today...who is planning to take her to a story time at 11 and so I doubt her nap can be before 12/12:30....however, she generally takes her longest nap around 12:30/45 and she woke around 7:00 today so that should work out fairly well since I'd normally let her go until 1:00 on a day she woke at 7:00, so it is technically earlier. I don't want my mom to have to skip taking her to play with the other kids as she really loves it.

She has been doing one nap for a pretty decent amount of time now and done really well so I am wondering if it's just bedtime I'm really mistiming. Last night she actually did better than usual. I had her up at 7:20 and she was sleeping by about 7:50 so before 8 which was great and made it to about 7:00 so that was good. (Of course her nap yesterday was 1.5 hours--on her own-- so who knows what role that played)

I'll let you know how today/tonight goes later. I'll def. plan for early bedtime.

[clazzat]

M was a little older when we went through this (but she is very high sleep needs, and I know that Ava is much lower sleep needs), but when she started babbling before she went to sleep it was because of OT.  She has never been able to babble for a while and then just fall asleep (I know a lot of them do) - she would always end up missing her sleep window and getting OT.  One thing that I did discover, though, was that it was important to wake her by a certain time after her nap (for us it was 2.30) to make sure that her A to bed was long enough.  Even if she had messed around before going to sleep for her nap, I found that the best way to keep her on track was to wake her despite the short nap, go for bed at the usual time and take the next day from there.

The way we got out of the rut was to wake her earlier in the morning (so 6.45 rather than 7/7.15) and offer her a slightly earlier nap (pulled back from 12.45 to 12.30, finishing at 2.30) and a slightly later bedtime (moved from 6.45 to 7/7.15).  This got her back to falling asleep straight away, and then once we were back in the swing of things we were able to go back to waking her a bit later in the morning and not stress so much about exactly what time she started her nap

Not sure if any of this will help, but I hope it does.

[squeakersmum]

We have had a similar problem but only a few times.  I worked out that it was happening when something more interesting/exciting than usual happened.

It's at it's worst if we come in from being out and about at nap time and I try to put him down straight away.  Not a chance - he's awake for ages and, like you say, ends up making himself overtired.  I found that if I let him play with his toys or explore upstairs for a few minutes he is ok.  It's like he's distracted by something and unless he gets it out of his system he can't get to sleep!

[~*Nicole*~]

Thanks for the info ladies. It is helpful.

Clare-She most often is able to babble for awhile and still fall asleep but about 1/3 of the time ends up OT and crying out as is unsettled. So that's why I'm trying to tweak b/c I think if I leave things be she'll end up always OT from chronically shortening her nights herself as a result of this whole thing and I want to ward off any really terrible issues.

We were finding that she napped longer/better for a later nap time which is sort of what started this whole mess b/c then she still seemed to need a certain length A to bed or was acting UT and not settling. Sometimes when we have her nap earlier she does a short nap. But somewhere along the way I think the OT started to creep in and I want to nip it in the bud before it gets worse. I'm a little afraid of the early nap = a short nap and also leading to OT but I'm not sure if that will be the case or not at the moment.

Squeakersmum-I have found she takes longer to settle if she is bored/has pent up energy (as in, she didn't get out or do much that day) or if something more exciting is going on. So I know what you mean.

[~*Nicole*~]

Okay.....today's nap:

down a little after 12 (better than I thought) and asleep by 12:30
DH fell asleep from 1:00ish to 2:45!!!!! She was babbling to herself and awake when he woke up so he doens't know how long she napped. But says she was pleasant when he got her so doesn't think she cried or was up too long before him. So sounds good.

So I'll try for 7:00 bedtime, since I'd usually shoot for 7:30.

[~*Nicole*~]

I had her in bed at 7:05. She CRIED when I put her down. I stuck with it and walked out and downstairs thinking I'd be walking right back up. She started to quiet down so I didn't rush up. Still, I wondered why she had cried since she has been lying down and letting me tuck her in so nicely without crying for such a long while now. Then she got quiet at about 7:10/15ish. Then at 7:20 we heard her singing. Then by 7:30 she was asleep. So all in all she went to bed earlier than usual but it still took her a little bit.

We'll stick with it for tomorrow and see how it goes.

[~*Nicole*~]

Up at 6:30 (11 hr. night) heard her a few times but didn't have to go in.

[clazzat]

That's not too bad.  TBH, some of them do just like to chat for a bit before they go to sleep - maybe processing the day?  And she is so verbal, perhaps she just needs to do this and you just need to try to get her in bed at the right time to allow her to chat for as long as she needs to but still fall asleep early enough.

[~*Nicole*~]

Clare-I am wondering about that myself. When she goes to bed around 8 or 8:30 she'll sleep until around 7:00am or even a bit later...7:15 (7:30 is the latest we get). So if she's going to do 11 hrs. tops, I might want to stil to 8:00/8:15 b/c the later wake up is SO NICE...which means I might have to plan for 7:30 or 7:45 bedtimes depending on her nap. But I will stick with the early plan for 3 consec. days to see what the WHOLE picture is.