This is my first post on the boards, but before I go much further I want to say a big THANK YOU to those of you who have posted and answered before me as I have found all your questions and answers very helpful.
Not sure this is the board to put it on but here goes...Where to begin? I am having some bedtime issues with one of my twins and it has been going on for months and I am just not sure what to do next. Both boys are 26 weeks old (born 4 weeks early). I started EASY from week one and for the most part it has been amazing. Both are very textbook and began STTN around 8 weeks ago. As long as I don't have a day that leaves them OT/UT I just have to go through the bedtime routine lay them down and they go down like a dream. Unfortunately 30 to 45 minutes later one of my DS wakes back up and I have to shush pat (though at this point is it pretty much just pat w/o the shush) him for 20 minutes to get him to go back down, every night!! This started around three or four months ago. At first I did not think much of this as at the time I was shush patting (20 minutes at a pop) both twins for almost every nap to keep them down. As they got older the shush pat for the naps started to drop off and they napped much better, but that post bedtime shush pat for the one DS remained. Finally, except for the occasional bad nap, the only time I was shush patting was at the 30/45ish minute mark after bedtime (always for the same twin). At this time I figured it was hanging on because DS was ready to switch to a 4 hour EASY, which I did but the post bedtime pat remained. I thought I would just ride it out and it would eventually drop off on its own but that has not been the case yet. I decided to start attacking it about three weeks ago and tried to use w2s. I did it for a week and it worked a few nights, but some nights it did nothing and it did not seem to have any lasting benefit, as in if I did not do it I was guaranteed to do the post bedtime pat. I tried extending A time, no change. I tried decreasing A time, just got bad naps. I tried patting for less than 20 minutes and all that happens is DS wakes up when I quite REALLY MAD and then I will be in the room for at least an hour. It seems that no matter what I do the post bedtime pat has remained firm and other than a night here or there I have gone in and patted DS for 20 minutes everynight. I had kind of resigned myself to this thinking at least both DSs are STTN and napping pretty well so 20 minutes a night was not really that big of a deal. Well now the shush pat (again minus the shush) is starting to not work. Last night and tonight DS just gets upset when I pat and it drags on for an hour plus. I thought it might be time to drop the swaddle (they were sleeping with just one arm out as they are both thumb suckers) so we left both arms out (it is a sleep sack style swaddle) and have had no discernible change good or bad (i.e. still sleeping well for naps and post DF, still doing post bedtime pat). I have tried to switch to PU/PD but both twins have HATED it and it only seems to escalate things, but right now that seems to be the only avenue left. I thought I would post here to get some feedback before I really try it in earnest as I am dreading a few nights of screaming as the only time I really tried it (about a month ago) he started having NW screaming bloody murder which is very unlike him. Our EASY is in a bit of transition as we just extended out our A time to 2.5 hours (naps were getting spotty, EW and also hoping that would be the key to dropping the post bedtime pat) and have tried to drop the catnap in the past week because otherwise DSs are going to bed really late as they are just not tired earlier and then the post bedtime pat cuts into the brief time I have with DH alone before DF and bedtime (we have 2 older DSs). Dropping the catnap may be why the post bedtime pat has gotten so messy, they are up three hours in the evening which is a lot for their age, but they seem to take it well and the DS in question will often fight initial bedtime if his last A time is under 2.5. That being said here is our current EASY, though it is not always in the E-A-S pattern:
E 8 (bottle)
A 8:25 ish (it takes a bit of time to feed both at once)
E 9 (rice cereal, thought there is not much E going on, it is more like W for "wear" and "what are you putting in my mouth?")
A
S 10:30 (2 hour nap, they don't seem to do well with less than 1.45 and 2 hours seems optimal)
E 12:30 (bottle)
A 12:55 ish
E 1:30 (rice cereal, see 9 am E)
A
S 3 (they do not always make it to 3)
E 5 (bottle)
A 5:25 ish
E 7:30 (bottle)
S 8 (bedtime)
DF 10:45 or 11
A few more details: both twins are FF and both very, very rarely wake on their own (except for the lovely post bedtime pat). I almost always wake them from every nap and in the morning - they have always been that way.
Sorry this is so long but I wanted to get in as much info as possible so it is all there at once rather than adding it in subsequent posts. Any help anyone can give would be much appreciated!!!!!
