(((hugs))) Denni, sounds like your whole family is really going through it right now!
I hope that things start turning your way soon
I think one of the best things you could do is get on a structured routine (which I know is going to be a challenge given everything you've got going on!). I don't mean a schedule though - bw is not about watching the clock, it's about watching your baby and following her cues. It's not about being rigid, but about providing familiarity, routine, and structure. There are some examples of typical routines by age here:
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=164253.0 and you can always post on the
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?board=41.0 forum for ideas on how to get started and how to make EASY work for your baby and your family. You'll find that if you can get yourselves going that you will see improvements in her feeds and her naps, I'm sure of it!
Re: your night feeds, 2 night feeds is actually quite typical around 10wo... You've got a couple options:
- you can try to stretch that 3-4am feed out by settling in another way (shh/pat, for example). If she simply won't settle, or she settles only to wake again, then I would assume hunger and feed.
- you could change the way you're feeding in the morning. If you do it right when she wakes up, you could try getting her up and changing her diaper first. Or if you typically get her up for a bit before you try to feed, you could try doing it immediately upon waking in the still-darkened room (almost treating it like a night feed). Just changing up the morning routine might help you find what will keep her more interested.
- you could treat the morning feed as more of a top up. Sometimes babies still need that early morning feed, and then you just top them up at the normal wake up time to get them through to the next regular feed in their routine.
What do you think?