7mo: perfect days, horrible nights!

[samsmam]

Our 7mo LO is giving us a hard time and I'm hoping somebody can help us out with some ideas.

Since he's been about 6 months old, he's been having perfects days (ie 2.5-3hr A time, 2x1.5-2hour naps, feeding well, drinking well) and up to about 2 weeks ago was great at night also.  The past two weeks however have been very tough.  He's been up multiple times per night every night and he's been very difficult to get back to sleep.  Everytime he wakes, when I go in, he's waving his arms about and reaching out for me.  I try pat/shush but the arms continue to wave about and he pushes himself back onto his back so I can't pat.  So I've been trying PU/PD.  When I pick him up he grabs my hair and holds on to it tightly.  He goes quiet and settles.  As soon as he is quiet, I lay him down in his cot and he starts crying and waving his arms around again.  I have repeated this countless times but every night I end up APOP'ing him back to sleep (usually by feeding him).  I know I shouldn't do it and I know he's not hungry but it's the only thing that works and it's that or we go no sleep!  Generally, having gone to bed at 8pm and after countless wakings, he will settle around 1am and will normally go til about 6.30-7.

My conclusion is that this is separation anxiety.  Would anyone agree/disagree?

If it is, is there anything I should/could be doing to help him through this and help us to get some sleep?  I assume that this is developmental for this age.  Does anyone know when does this bout of SA usually settles?

Tia

[Tweakster]

Hi there, is he teething?  Could you post his actual day so we can see everything.  SA normally starts a bit later but not to say it can't start earlier.  He may have just developed object permanence and it's freaking him out a bit.

[samsmam]

Thanks so much for your response.  I'm starting to lose it here!

I may be wrong but I don't think its teething.  He got his two lower teeth about 6 weeks ago and these were really painful for him.  He'd wake at night chewing his hand and shrieking with pain.  We gave pain meds at bedtime and that seemed to do the trick.  This time its different - he's not doing that horrible blood curdling shriek, rather crying and fussing until I pick him up, then he's almost immediately quiet and his hands go flailing around for my hair or he rubs my chest.

A typical day would look like this:

8am Wake and milk
9am Cereal
11am Nap for 1.5/2 hours
1pm Wake and milk
2pm Lunch
4pm Nap for 2/1.5 hours
5.30pm Wake
6.30pm Dinner
7.30pm Milk and wind down
8.00pm Bedtime

He will then wake anything from 1 to 5/6 times between bedtime and 1am.  Each time it gets harder to get him back to sleep.  He will often then wake somtime around 4.30/5am and we'll try and get him back down to sleep again until 7.30-8.

Last night in an attempt to dtry something different, I didn't pick him up at all, rather tried to settle him in his cot with my hand resting on his chest - no talking, no shushing (seems to drive him insane now!).  He woke around 9.30pm and went back after about 30 minutes of just standing beside the cot with my hand on his chest.  He then slept until 5.45am when I repeated the same thing.  This time it took a whole hour before he settled again.  A slight improvement I guess, but was that just a fluke?  Is my new technique likely to work or will I just become a prop?

Is there anything else that you can think of that I can try?  Thanks for taking the time to look at this for me.

[ABC_mom]

Looks like we're in the same boat. I saw you posted on my string, so I hope any advice I get can be helpful to you. Last night I tried starting his BT ritual at 6:30. Seemed to help a bit. I also picked him up and held him for a couple of mins, calmly spoke to him and put him down. He rolled from side to side (I didn't even have to hold on to him very long either). He DID open his eyes a few times to chk if I was still there, so, like you,  I think it's partly SA. I've resolved to stay with him as long as he needs for another week, to see if his SA eases up. I've also tried more peek-a-boo games to help him understand I'm not GONE forever.... I've tried hiding under a blanket while saying "where's mommy? mommy where are you?" until he uncovers me and I shout "Adam found mommy! horray!" Over the next few days, I'm going to also try introducing a "lovey" toy at each wind-down, by cuddling with my LO and the toy while we read, sing, cuddle before nap/bed. I'll let you know if anything works!

[Rizzo]

Hi, i have another post in NW's too. I have a 7.5mo ds. His NWs are getting worse and worse, more frequent, and is harder to settle each time too. His bottom teeth are pretty much through the gums now, and he was sick last week, so dont know how much of the wakings are pain or post-illness.

Cant offer you any tips, as am having no luck on my end!!!

[Tweakster]

@samsmam - your routine looks ok.  How often is he doing 2 hr naps though?  Most kids at this age are fine with 3 hrs day sleep and 11-12 at night.  So you might try limiting his naps to 1.5 hrs so see if that helps.  He could actually be UT in the night.

[ABC_mom]

I think I finally figured out my problem with my little guy, hopefully, it helps for you. During his last BF, he would usually fall alseep and I'd put him to bed, and up until 4 weeks ago, it had worked and he'd slept through from 8pm-7am. But, my theory is that he is now much more aware of what's going on, and so if I put him in his crib sleeping, he would wake up screaming because the last thing he remembered was being with me... so, a little separation anxiety I guess. I tried nursing him a bit earlier or keeping him awake while I nursed, then I would put him to bed as usual with the full sleep ritual, and ta-da! It's worked for the past week!! Just be prepared becuase the first night he cried when he was in his crib, but I ddin't go in and he was out within 8 minutes. The next night was the same, only he cried for 4 min... the next night, no crying and a full night's sleep again. Hope it works for you!