Snacking @ 10 months

[CrimpleDimple]

Hi all, I'm hoping someone out there can give me some insight! My DS is 10 months and I believe he's been a "snacker" for a while and it's effecting his sleep. How do I break him from snacking so I can be sure he's getting enough during the day so he won't wake to eat at night? I'm desperate to keep breastfeeding but his snacking is taking a toll on my supply (or so I think). Anyone who has any information or advice, PLEASE post!!!

A little background: He wakes A LOT at night. Sometimes it's to eat, sometimes it's out of habit ...this is a whole different problem, though, so I'll spare you. I'm just trying to work on one thing at a time and this one seems like it should be addressed first. He doesn't eat very long and for the most part, he nurses to sleep for his naps so sometimes I feel like he doesn't get a full meal. Also, he doesn't really eat a full meal in the morning when we wake because he comfort nurses throughout the night to stay asleep (yes, terrible habit but this is why I'm here - to get rid of these habits and instill new ones). So, all in all, he nurses on demand and I want to try to change that. Probably the biggest issue right now is nursing to sleep. He does this for naps and bedtime and throughout the night so any advice on this is welcome. TIA.

[Grace's Mummy]

I had this problem too! I stopped nursing before naps and instead I nursed after. I have now stopped nursing before she goes to bed. I will nurse her and then we will put away her toys and say goodnight to them. We then turn out the light and I sing to her. I changed the routine to make sure she is well awake before putting her in her cot. I still feed her in the night because I think she needs it. I do that once or twice. As soon as she has stopped taking in milk, I say are you finished. She understands that now (DD is 10.5 months old) and will get off. I started this about three weeks ago. Before that I was comfort feeding practically the whole night (we were co-sleeping) and she would use it to get to sleep. I would take your DD off when he starts comfort nursing. It will be difficult, but worth it in the end. There will be lots of screaming and crying. You need to be strong for that because it is very hard listening to your LO screaming. I used PU/PD and we are still working with it, but she doesn't comfort suck or feed to sleep anymore.

My post is:

7 days on and still screaming hysterically

Have a look. There is lots of great advice on it.

I also have a nursing to sleep one.

There are lots of people on here who will give you lots of support and help.

Good luck! If you need any more help, just ask!

[CrimpleDimple]

Thank you so much for the information!

[CrimpleDimple]

Also, how do I know whether he is getting the proper amount of food per meal? ....it's hard to gauge and I'm not sure if he should be getting 8 ounces per meal or less considering our breastmilk changes to accomodate our child's needs? Does this mean he could be getting the same amout of nutrients in 5 ounces of breastmilk than he would in 8 ounces of formula?

[anna*]

Grace's mummy is going to give you great support and advice, she has JUST been through this!!

Re amounts, I really wouldn't worry too much. If you can space your feeds out to about 4 hours, you can be fairly sure that he'll take a good, full feed, and if little guy is taking to solids well, I honeslty don't think you need to concern yourself over amounts. If you really want to 'know' how much he takes at a feed, you could give a bottle of EBM and see how much he takes? I think my LO was taking about 8oz of EBM at a feed at this age.

[CrimpleDimple]

Hmmm, well, when he is offered bottles of formula while I'm away at class, he usually only takes about 4 ounces, sometimes less. The most he EVER takes is 6 ounces. Okay, another question, while spacing his feeds out do you think it will be okay to implement an EASY schedule and PU/PD for bedtime at the same time? I have done some serious accidental parenting for the past 10 months and I really feel it needs to be changed ASAP.

[anna*]

My LO has always been a big eater and a huge baby, so maybe it's not a good gauge, I don't know! When he's taking those 4oz bottles, are they 4hrs apart?

Personally yes, I would implement the EASY and space the feeds and do PUPD for all naps and bedtime. I know some parents prefer to do things gradually, but I think (most! not all!) babies are pretty adaptable and I would rather get all of the difficult days and rough nights over with and then come out the other side quickly.

I'd start by having a routine in mind to aim for, and a game plan for settling to sleep without BF, and use it at all naps and at bedtime and for night wakings too.

[Grace's Mummy]

I agree with Anna and that is what I did (with lots of help from Anna). I think it is best to get all the difficult things out of the way all at once. That way once it is over, you're done and you don't need to start on the next thing.

Re the food - I wouldn't worry too much. Our LO took until about 10 months to really get going with the solids. I am reading a fabulous book "My Child Won't Eat" by Carlos Gonzalez, M.D.. It is fabulous and basically says that a child will eat what they need and if they don't eat so much one meal, it means they don't need it. He is very clear that a child should never be forced to eat. I think the book may be out of print here, but you may be able to get it in the USA and shipped to where you are. It is a great book and really put my mind at rest regarding our DD's eating habits.

It is good to spread out the BF to every four hours - or whenever he wakes from a nap. I feed my LO during the night, when she wakes, and every time after a nap. It does work out about every four hours.

You will be amazed at how adaptable babies are (as Anna said) and they can cope with most things - apart from being OT!

I think if you get your EASY going and you do PU / PD, you will be doing very well. It will take a while to get it going. I am still tying with mine and it has been three weeks. Some days are better than others. Yesterday was a terrible day for us and I could easily have given up - but I won't, come what may, because I know that this is the best thing for our LO, no matter how long it takes her to get used to doing it. I am sure it will be the same for you.

Think about an EASY and then post it for us to see and we can help with it.

I hope you had a good night.

[CrimpleDimple]

Thank you guys for being so helpful. Grace's Mummy, I read your post about nursing to sleep and I have to say, I could have wrote the same thing word for word. My son always wakes 30 minutes after falling asleep at night! It's put a huge damper on my relationship with SO. Anyways, Grace's Mummy, could you post your EASY so I can get an idea of what I should be shooting for?

[Grace's Mummy]

This is what I aim for. Anna gave it to me.

EASY for 10 month old:

7am awake and milk
8am solids
10.30am nap
11.30am awake and milk
12.30pm solids
3pm nap
4.30pm awake and milk
5.30pm solids
7pm last milk
7.30pm asleep for the night

Grace doesn't wake up at the same time every day, so I just alter it depending on when that is. I try to have A times of 3.5 hours between each nap. Sometimes that doesn't work and I need more or less. Today for example it was:

Tuesday 21st September 2010
Woke at 12.15 am and fed and resettled within 15 mins. Woke again at 5.55 am and did the same within 20 mins.
Woke finally at 7.15 am, so had 12.5 hours sleep last night compared with 10 hours the night before!

A - 7.15 am (BF when she woke up)
E - 8 am
S - 11 - 12.10 pm - 1 hour and ten mins (BF when she woke up)
A - 12.10 pm til lunch
E - 12.40 pm
A - until 3.40 pm
S - 3.40 pm - 4.20 pm - 40 mins (BF when she woke up)
A - 4.20 pm - 7.10 pm (BF at bedtime)

A time is to include wind down and any time spent in the cot. I read that on another post.
For me, the important thing is to have an EASY, but to be a bit flexible with it. Generally, I aim for 3.5 hours A time, but if she is tired, I will cut that short. She can do up to 4 hours A time if necessary.
Tonight is the first time that she has really put herself to sleep and we have been doing this for over three weeks. I haven't had the courage to go out and miss a nap, but on Friday, I am going to try it! We will not miss a nap, but it will have to fit around going to a friend's house.

It takes a lot of time and commitment and there will be days / times when you want to give up - but don't because this will really help in the long run. There may be lots of crying and screaming too and that is extremely hard to listen to. Our DD gets much more sleep now and she is much happier. The most important thing is to avoid the OT cycle. I have found that hard and am still finding my way a bit, but we are making very good progress.

Just to add, I take detailed notes every day and I find that helps a lot. It keeps me on track and if I have a bad day, I can go back and see where I went wrong. It is very much worth taking the time to do that.

Hope this helps you.

[anna*]

Grace's mummy, you are a star. Despite still having some really hard days yourself, it is wonderful that you're finding time to step up and support CrimpleDimple. This is the whole basis of this forum, and why it works. Mums who've been there, helping out other mums.

[CrimpleDimple]

Thank you so much!! You give me hope!! I really appreciate you taking the time to help me. I'll update you guys on my progress!