Refusing bottle - any success stories?

[bexandlucy]

Hey!

My little monkey loves her boobyjuice WAAAAAY too much and is totally not interested in taking milk from any other receptacle!

I feel at my wits end, I can't leave her for more than a few hours and I'm starting to feel really claustrophobic, I really need some 'me' time. My OH would love to be able to feed her as well.

I've trawled this site (and others) and found loads of great advice, and trust me I've tried it all, but she just screams and screams every time the bottle comes near her. I've considered trying a beaker but I don't want to confuse her further and I get the impression shes not crying out of hunger but because she wants the comfort too. I thought I'd cracked it a few weeks ago, she was taking a few oz from the bottle and I even got so far as the replace a couple of feeds quite happily, but I left it a week without trying and suddenly she's not having any of it. (We've got a paed appointment this morning for vomiting issues too.)

I just need a bit of encouagement. Has anyone else had the same problem and overcome it? Or if you didn't how did you eventually get rid of the breast when weaning? Luckily I've got till March before I go back to work, but I can see this becoming a major issue.

I love breastfeeding so much, but this is draining me. What would happen if I were suddenly unable to breastfeed? The thought terrifies me

xx

[~ Vik ~]

Success story here!  I pumped and bottle fed almost exclusively for the first 3mo, and then when I finally got Dylan back to breastfeeding I didn't want to look at my pump again!   Then 10mo rolled around, and I was returning to work, and got TOTAL bottle refusal.  I was freaking out.  But we did it!  I made the story an FAQ, so here it is if you want to read the whole thing:  http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=173308

How did the paed appointment go?

[JayLeigh]

DS also refused for most of his baby-hood. Couldn't even feed him in his sleep!! He would try, and wake up ANGRY. They only success we had was with the Tommy Tippee bottles at 10 months. I *think* for my LO it was the large malleable nipple that made the difference. He wanted something he could really latch onto. I LOVE those bottles.

[*Liz*]

I managed as well - I got him onto the bottle at 5.5 mths as my paed wanted me to move to a hypoallergenic formula. I mix fed breast and bottle until 7 mths after that.

If you suddenly had to stop BFing for a major reason your LO WOULD take a bottle and wouldn't starve. A baby can't starve themselves - as long as they are fit and well they just don't have that ability - so you really don't need to worry about that. But likewise you don't need to feel that you need to starve onto a bottle either. If she was taking the bottle before then it really is a 'preference blip' only.

Have you tried offering at a set time every day? Not expecting her to feed - but just to build it into her routine?

My DD isn't taking a bottle either (mainly as I have rarely offered it too her and she has milk intolerance so can't have regular formula, and I find it so hard to pump when the toddler is racing around me. Can't get a let down  ). It is looking as though she is going to need hypoallergenic formula as well and I mentioned to the paed that she doesn't even take a bottle and he just said to start giving her it every day, and to give a bit of the formula by spoon if needed so she is happy with the taste when it comes out the bottle. Obviously if you are using EBM then you won't need to think about that though  .

Good Luck 

[bexandlucy]

Thanks! Its good to know I'm not alone and there is a light at the end of the tunnel!!

The paed says she's got reflux and has prescribed ranitidine so we'll see if that helps with the vomiting and weight loss.

Liz - someone suggested that I 'starve' her onto a bottle but I really didn't feel comfortable doing that. I think I may have inadvertantly given her a bit of a phobia over it though, she starts crying the moment she sees the bottle.

The bottle preference - do you think it could be to do with me letting other people feed her? I know that its meant to be more successful if someone other than me were to try, but due to not having anyone else around, it had to be me trying, and we finally got there a few weeks ago. Then that weekend I let my mum feed her and it was after that that I started having problems again. Could it be that she just associates feeding with me, ie comfort etc?

We seem to be having more luck with a beaker at the moment, DH had a go yesterday and she took 3oz from it (we think) she likes to grab hold and take it to her mouth herself. Is she a bit young for this yet?

[*Liz*]

She is young for a beaker - but if she is OK with it then no worries. The issue is usually that the flow is far too fast for them. What beaker did you try?

I think some BFing babies really do think milk comes from Mama (and of course it does, doesn't it  ). I know what everyone says but when I did get poor Jacob to take the bottle he took it from me, and for weeks afterwards he always fed horizontal with his head sideways just like a BFing position. He used to want to 'latch and accept' the bottle as well. It I cradled him and put it in he would not be happy.

Actually we never really got over the milk from Mama. If I wasn't around he would either go without or take 1-2oz to take the edge off. He would sometimes refuse even his bedtime feed for DH (when I was working). He would cope if I wasn't around at all, but if I was in there was no way he was having milk from anyone other than me. Milk comes from Mama.

How fast is your milk flow? If your LO has reflux it may be a flow preferance thing as well? What size teat have you been using?

[bexandlucy]

Lucy was the same, when she did take it she would have to be horizontal and she'd always turn her head to the side (but away from me) before she started sucking properly. I had to be stood up and gently swaying as well, with my fingers on her cheek. I think there's a bit of 'touchy' in her - she likes things just so!!

There is so much going on with her at the moment I'm going to give her a break and start again fresh in a few days, or when she's better. (Reflux problems, lingering tummy bug, 4mo growth spurt, teething) - our EASY is out the window and I think the bottle training is just stressing us out even more.

Plan for when we recommence: Stick to 1 type of bottle, she was ok with tommee tippee ctn ones before so will go with these. Size 2 teats were better than size one but I'm wondering if variable would be better? I'm not sure on my flow - It was fast, but seems to have slowed down a lot recently. I feel like my milk supply is decreasing but I'm trying not to worry about it. Go with the 11am feed daily and take her lead, stop when she fusses. Should I leave it a while before I breastfeed her in case she associates refusal of the bottle with getting breast?

[*Liz*]

Sounds like a good plan  .

I think I would go for the size 2 teat if that is what she was managing best before - variable can work well for some LOs though.

I would try and put at least 30 mins before offering the boob if you can (I wouldn't leave screaming hungry though - more if you can distract for a bit so that she doesn't refuse the bottle and then get the boob immediately iyswim?)

[Mama2boys]

can I please join in, struggling with getting Ds2 to take bottle again and ts driving me crazy

[bexandlucy]

Course you can join in! How are you getting on?

I've given up on the bottle, but I'm going to try the same thing with a beaker. I found a great one that is a sort of modified free flow:

http://www.tommeetippee.co.uk/product/tip_it_up_cup_6m__/

and tis great, its non spill so she can wave it around the place but as soon as her lips touch the spout it flows and she's used it maybe 3 times and has already taken a whole milk feed from it. She loves being in control of it (my independent little lady!) and because she can take it to her mouth herself she's really happy.

[Mama2boys]

luckily was just a phase for us and DS is taking a bottle a day again...thank good ness....looking back seems a teething issue as he cut skin on his first tooth as well.

[*Liz*]

Wow that is really great news 

You are inspiring me to try properly with DD.

The cup does look interesting - but I have wasted money on SO many cups - do they need to suck much to get the milk out??

[bexandlucy]

No, no sucking needed, thats why its great for Lucy. Its a silicone spout and quite a touch sensitive valve, as soon as she touches her lips to it it pretty much free flows, but sort of to a lesser extent than the proper free flow if that makes sense, but it makes less mess than those cause when she flings it about it doesn't spill. She loves having control of it and being able to take it to her mouth herself and she does end up sucking a little bit as she pre empts the milk coming.

I suppose the control thing is key, I guess the problem with the bottle is her not being in control of it.

I know what you mean about spending money on these things, the amount of different bottles I've tried 

[*Liz*]

Hmmm - that does sound good  - Megan will suck a free flow and drink nicely but the flow is too fast for her and she gulps down too much air in the process.

You should see my bottle mountain from the 2 of them