Boob slave

[Enidsmama]

Hi there,

This is my first time posting about my 7 mos old.

We are just getting off the tangled path of nursing to sleep/co-sleeping/co-napping/schedulelessness.

For the last 6 days we have been following e.a.s.y with, i think great success.  My dd is now napping and sleeping in her crib and we are no longer nursing to sleep.  I'm even beginning to see some longer naps!

My question is around night nursing.  In bed, she became quite habituated to cluster feeding for the first few hours of the night and the last few hours.  That along with waking up to nurse every 2 hours in between.  Exhausting!

I think i am on the way to ending the frequent early evening wake ups (pu/ pd). Often though, i second guess myself and begin worrying that maybe she really is hungry.  So, she'll have an 8:30 pm "snack."  then i dreamfeed her at 11 pm.  

She the will begin to wake up about every 1.5-2 hours.  I am trying to schedule those feeds ... Ieput her off for a bit.  So i give in at 2 am and at 5 am.

The real issue (&  feels like many as i type) is that come 5 am she wants to start cluster feeding again until we get up at 7 am.  I have bee feeding her at 5 and then hoping for the best  if she does n't got back to sleep, i'm throwing in the towel at 6 am and bringing her into bed for a last morning feed. Then we get up at 7 am.

So my list of questions are many:

1. If i just trust the process, as my dd learns to sleep, will the feedings naturally drop off?

2.  She is a small baby, in the 10th percentile, should i still bf on demand at night?

3.  Should i try to pu/ pd til she falls asleep and then nurse her if she wakes up a few minutes later?

4.  Am i setting a bad precedent by bringing her to bed at 6 am?

5. Should i just relax and take my victories where they are for awhile?

Here's my routine

E 7-7:30 wake up and bf (thrown by early morning feedings)

A 8:00 breakfast and play

S 9:00 (nap 1.5 hours)

E 11:30 bf

A 12:00 lunch and play

S 1:30 (nap1.5-2 hours)

E 4:00 BF

A 4:30 dinner and play

A 5:30 bath, quiet time, night routine

S 7:00 pm


Thank you!!!!K

[~ Vik ~]

Hi and welcome!  Congratulations on all you've accomplished so far - it sounds like you've really put forth a huge effort and you've seen great results during the day   I will do my best to help you with your questions.

1.  Yes and no (I know, I'm super helpful so far )  I never actively dropped any night feeds (except the dream feed) with my ds - I feel that STTN is a milestone just like rolling over or walking, that all babies will reach in their own time.  I fed at night until he was just over 1 year old, when he just stopped waking to eat.  BUT our night time feeds were quite consistent (dreamfeed plus 2, then dreamfeed plus 1, the dropped the dreamfeed so just the 1, until all gone) which is why I felt that he still needed them and would drop them when he was ready.  In your case it does seem less like hunger and more like a prop, so when she naturally wakes through the night she needs the boob to go back to sleep rather than to take a proper feed.  By stopping the feed to sleep during the day and teaching her the skills she needs for independent sleep you are DEFINITELY helping, but you may find that you need to get her out of the habit a little more actively too.   Here's a link from kellymom.com with ideas to help encourage fewer night nursing sessions:  http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html

2.  For every baby that's in the 97th percentile, there has to be one in the 3rd, kwim?  I wouldn't look so much at the percentile itself, but rather is she gaining steadily?  Is she meeting her milestones?  Does she seem satisfied after feeds?  Use that to make your decision.  Genetics plays such a huge part - if you or your partner are smaller, then it's normal for your baby to be too   Dylan is really tall and quite skinny (size 2 pants are nearly too short, but I have to take the waists right in!) just like my DH. 

3.  If pu/pd works for you, then go for it!  One thing that I suggest often is to watch the clock a bit at night if you're trying to drop night feeds or stop too-frequent nursing - so if your lo is on a 4h feeding routine during the day, then she should be able to go 4h at night too.  So if your last feed is 7pm (and you're confident that it's a good feed) and she wakes at 9pm then I wouldn't feed but use another method to settle (your partner might have better luck if possible, as she may be confused and expect to be fed by you).  If she wakes at 1050 (so 3h50m, to me close enough) then I would feed.   

4.  Only you can answer that question.  I can tell you that it's normal for all people, regardless of age, to enter into a lighter sleep phase in the wee hours of the morning and sleep can be more easily disrupted - it's just the way we work.  I chose never to bring Dylan into bed with us simply because I knew that it was a hard habit to break, and I wanted him to sleep completely independently, but other moms do this and are able to get more sleep and have no problems because of it.  It's really a matter of personal preference, but remember that Tracy said "start as you mean to go on".  How would you feel about doing this when she is 2?  5?  Be honest with yourself and decide what works best for you and your family!

5.  LOL   Again, it's up to you.  You've accomplished so much, and no harm will come if you want to take a break and see if your work on independent sleep during the day helps at night too

Let me know what you think?

5. 

[Enidsmama]

Thanks for your thorough response (despite my many typos!)

I'll really write down her wake times tonight.  By 2 am I lose administerial speed!  That will help me to determine when she is snacking versus eating.

More than anything, I appreciate the support and encouragement.  I think I was starting to lose some perspective!

I'll let you know how she does with the 4 hour spacings between night feeds.  I think I'll drop the DF as I think maybe she just makes it an habitual thing?

Thanks again!!