Did you have to wean when you didn't want to? Stories please :)

[arabesque]

Hi everyone,

Very briefly I've had huge problems with BF this time round (and 4.5mo straight of mastitis with DS1) but I think I have to wean. The issue is I don't want to, and DS2 wants me also.

I'm sad, torn, indecisive, emotional and teary.

I want to keep feeding, I made it through the mastitis with DS1 to feed for 18mo, I want that for DS2 as well. However he's a shocking feeder...on/off all the time, I've had mastitis twice, he wants to snack and top up, he wakes screaming for food as if he's starving (he's a very reluctant solids eater...sigh...that's another huge issue) and it just seemed all too much when DS1 was pretend playing this evening and said to DH "my baby doesn't cry, vomit or whinge. And she eats from a spoon and the spoon is clean". I just realised I'm missing my beautiful DS1 with all of DS2's problems. I spend all day carrying round a crying baby 

Any stories, advice, anything...most welcome

Thanks for reading

[jacsmummy]

Firstly...huge hugs to you....it's such an emotional thing bf-ing 

My story still gets me wound up, because I feel very let down by the bf councillor who was *helping* me along.... My DS was born at 35weeks and it was such a struggle~infact the hardest thing I have ever learnt to do to get him feeding properly, but we did and he fed beautifully up unitl he hit a growth spurt at 3.5 mnths....I rang her almost in tears as he was having difficulties at bedtime...he seemed very hungry still and I was really concerned about my supply...she basically palmed me off by saying bf babies just get teasy at bedtime? wtf? Anyways, not wanting to *hassle* her I left it for a few more days by which point my poor ds was pratically fitting with anger...easily the most horrible time with my boy....and in the end I bought a bottle & formula~and he eventually took it and the relief coupled with guilt and sadness was overwhelming....I tried to express but nothing would come although I felt full up and I ended up with vey bad mastitus, on antibiotics & directics...I felt so miserable and also in pain!!!! I rang her again to say what had happened and she barked down the phone that I shouldn't have given ds formula as it was harmful to him as he was ebf.....
Anyways, with the imminent arrival of no2 I am determined to do it for longer and not rely on people who basically treat me like a stupid kid this time........for starters I will come here before I contact any health visitors as I have no faith in them whatsoever!
I hope that hasn't totally depressed you, you are amazing to have done 18 mnths with ds1...I think that you know when the time is right and I'm sure you will make the right choices.....big hugs Xx

[arabesque]

Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry you had such a rough time with your first. ALl the best for your second! And you're right, this forum has so much wonderful advice and support. It's always my first port of call now. Hope you get your wish of feeding #2 for longer. xx

[besjoux]

Yes, with my first I mistakenly thought that tylenol PM was just a nighttime sleep aid and not benedryl. I took it a few times and it dried me up. Also, the mirena dried me up. It was so emotional for me to have to give up BFing but once we were done it was surprisingly very good. DS1 started sleeping better, eating more, and was happier. I also started to relax and enjoy my freedom more. And truth be told....I ENJOYED feeding a bottle. In fact, I feed DS2 a bottle a day because I actually enjoy that too. So, I was really down about having to wean but (in the end) it worked out great.

[arabesque]

Thank you! I found your reply very helpful. We have decided to try to wean. This will be hard because DS2 wants to feed from me as much as I want to feed from him.

[Lemonthyme]

Just to let you know, until about a month ago, my son just snacked all day and there was no getting him to change.  Once he has now settled with solids (and it took a few weeks, we started weaning at 19 weeks) he will now breastfeed happily every 3-4 hours and take more substantial feeds as a result.

If you really don't want to give up, why not give it a couple more weeks and see if you can change things first?

[jacsmummy]

Thanks....I hope so, I'm so looking forward to doing it again! Xx