You can get coconut oil in health food stores or in the allergen-free/organic/specialty section of a lot of grocery stores. It's a fantastic substitute for butter in baking, you can spread it on toast, etc. It's very high in good fats. You can get coconut milk too, which has a nice creamy texture. I have a beef stroganoff recipe that uses coconut milk instead of dairy cream and it is YUMMY
For Dylan I honestly just make a lot of stuff from scratch - because he has multiple allergies it's just easier that way. I have read loads of labels and called lots of companies for information and I have safe standbys of packaged foods on hand for quick snacks/meals if need be (which does happen, with DH and I both working 40h/week!). It can seem daunting at first, but once you get into a routine and know what's safe and what's not it just becomes normal.
But let's not get ahead of ourselves
Definitely see what kind of thoughts you get on the allergy board, and maybe even consult with your doctor to see if they have any thoughts. Have you been keeping a food journal? That can really help identify triggers.