9 months old and still waking **Updated** Please help!!

[firsttimemummy]

Amelie is now 10 months old yet we are still in the same place.  She has had illness after illness after illness and still isnt right.  She's been left with a horrible cough that just wont shift at the moment.

This sounds like Oliver too (although he isn't quite 10 months).  This time of year is terrible.  I think Murray was the same but not long after he did stop wakening in the night for milk, etc and then sstn (and still does).  Are you offering water when she is coughing, rather than milk? I did that last night and it worked for Oliver (up til now I have been feeding him) so hoping to stop the night feeds and try to pat him instead (patting the soles of his feet!! - DH did that last night after I had given him some water (O, not DH!!) and it worked).  O then took a good feed this morning.

I am now going to stop the 3pm feed and give solids instead (maybe offering milk after the snack) as I feel that he needs more substance, as well as upping the amount of food he gets (to replace the milk calories from all the night feeds).

[**Clare**]

Thanks Lucy.  I havent offered water, the cough isnt the thing waking her or I may have thought to do that.  Its just she has a cough and a snotty nose and shes just generally not that well, she cough's at night but this doesnt usually wake her, she sometimes cries out but settles back down.  She is just waking as she always does... I bet this doesnt even make sense, sooo tired I cant think straight!!

Could I give water at this point instead of 1 ounce of formula?! Not sure what would be best! 

[firsttimemummy]

I know the feeling   I think Oliver would waken anyway but because he is so snotty it's hard to breathe so I have been feeding him to unblock his nose.  I also think that if they have a sore throat (you never can tell), esp with the heating on which can be drying, offering water rather than just pupd/patting etc reassures me that they are not getting dehydrated.

 You can give water instead of formula - if you know she doesn't need the calories, etc then water is good.  We used to do it with Murray who quickly learnt that it wasn't worth wakening for (he would often not waken the following night, and when I was consistent with offering water, or his dummy only, he stopped wakening as much).

[**Clare**]

Oh I really need to toughen up. I just feel so bad not feeding her, she's baby led weaned and will not be fed so I do worry about what she is actually eating, there seems to be alot on the floor. If I was so sure she'd had enough calories in the day Id find it soooo much easier to not feed.

I'm going to try 2 oz again tonight then will decide what to do tomorrow night.

The other thing is the DF... Do I, don't I?!

She's awake.... Grrrr....

[firsttimemummy]

My midwife used to say to me that if she woke in the night and someone brought her some nice food she would eat it   If you are not confident she is eating enough in the day then I would give her some formula.  Have you tried offering some mashed food etc as well as baby-led weaning to ensure she is eating enough?

Just remind yourself that she WILL sstn at some point (all teenagers refuse to get OUT of bed, but sure it will happen way before then ) - that's what I remind myself

[**Clare**]

He he!! This is true

She won't take food off a spoon unless she does it herself which doesn't really work yet!! She will NOT let us feed her, she just shakes her head and won't open her mouth! We are working on getting her to spoon feed herself but she's not really developmentally ready. We give her mashed food in a bowl and she will eat it with her hands. So gross but guess that may be an option!!

Last night was just a no go. She was so poorly, I've never seen so much snot  Think we will leave it now until she's better but would really appreciate the support when the time comes!

Thanks Lucy 

[firsttimemummy]

yes - when they are ill the rule book goes out the window   I also find accepting that they WILL waken makes it less stressful for some reason