Author Topic: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help  (Read 1367 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline *Jo*

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 148
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7314
  • 3 wee monkeys and a Mamma
  • Location:
scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« on: December 06, 2011, 08:41:55 am »
well it seems that we are recovering from the OT monster arriving. what happened was we had three days where Levi refused his catnap and so it would be about 3 hours till bedtime (the earliest bedtime I could give him was 5.30pm due to being up at 5.30am in the morning) and he was refusing bedtime, it takes me 1 hour+ to get him to bed at night. so after three days of this we then had a night where he was up 10 times!! then we had three days of pure hell with taking 1.5 hours to get him to nap, he would then only nap 40mins and  bedtime would take 2 hours, he would only sleep about 10.5 hours at night still and would be up at 5-5.30am, rinse lather repeat.

Today he managed a 2 hour morning nap, plus a 2.5 hour midday nap, we got a short 40min nap after that but again he refused the catnap so it was 3 hours till he was finally asleep for the night (put him down at 6pm, took 40mins to get him to sleep)

Im really worried that whats happening is these catnap refusals are building up OT and we are gonna get slammed again. I cant go through another day like those three days weve just had. I nearly lost my mind.

his A times today (that produced decent naps) were 1 hour 25mins. we got the 40min nap when he went 1 hour 35mins

also i tried HTTJ and he HATED it, so I just quickly patted him as he came out of light sleep and thats when he did the decent naps. he started to come out of sleep at 36mins every single time but for some reason that last nap he wouldnt go back to sleep and then of course after that the catnap never happened.

he is APOP immune, can I say, IF he does sleep in the wrap it takes him half an hour longer than normal to actually fall asleep and then he only sleeps 20 mins. the ONLY thing that works is in his cot, dark room, white noise, patting his bum.

what can I do to beat this?





Offline becj86

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 346
  • Posts: 10859
  • Location: Brisbane, Australia
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2011, 01:14:46 am »
All I can offer is HUGS, Jo. Looking at the number of reads with no response, I think he's stumped us all :(

I'll keep thinking.

Offline *Jo*

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 148
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7314
  • 3 wee monkeys and a Mamma
  • Location:
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2011, 04:00:29 am »
Well another day of 40min naps and no nap since 2.40pm... We've tries four times to get him to take this last nap and it's just not happening, we are building up OT again.

I've got to get this sorted! I any keep going like this, all he does is cry when he's awake, this is spiraling out of control





Offline becj86

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 346
  • Posts: 10859
  • Location: Brisbane, Australia
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2011, 07:54:55 am »
Ok, so I've been thinking.

From what I've seen, he has slept a long nap without resettling before, so the 40min naps aren't necessarily developmental at this stage, they're likely either UT or OS. You've got a pretty small window with him, it seems and a 15min range of A times from UT and will not sleep to OT, screaming and not sleeping.

Since you're having so much trouble pin pointing a best A time and everything seems to be backfiring, I'll put my money on overstimulation. How you can get things more calm around him, I don't know - less noise, less toys, less visuals, less people... what do you think?

Is he picking up on your stress do you think? Would it help to go to a park and sit/lie on a blanket with him while C plays close by?

Offline *Jo*

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 148
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7314
  • 3 wee monkeys and a Mamma
  • Location:
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2011, 08:54:33 am »
Well interestingly enough, this morning I put him in the wrap and walked around doing some jobs with him attached to me. I noticed he was really quiet (but awake) so I took him to his room and put him in his sleepwrap and into bed. He self settled!!!! No assistance needed. He did however wake at the 45/50min mark (my neighbor was babysittig while I dropped C off at daycare so I don't know the exact time) I do t know what the A time was because he was awake at 5.30am for a feed and I put him back to bed, he was quiet for 20mins then started chatting for 15mins before I got him up. He was asleep at 7.30am. I was amazed!
The rest of the day went downhill with visitors so we had 40-50min naps and then a 4 hour gap till bedtime after trying endlessly to get him to sleep.

I can work on sleep tomorrow as C with be out all day with his Oma, but Friday will be another busy day. How else do I reduce stimulation with a whirlwind like Caleb around? Levi is also very active, he talks non stop and loves interacting with people alot.

When he's had decent daysleep he will sleep 11 hours without a feed at night. I desperately need about a week of these for my own sanity!

At the moment the weather is rubbish, bad rain and high winds so no park just all indoors and I just can't keep C away from his brother, he actually doesn't go crazy or anything around Levi anyway, it may just be my stress that he's picking up on but what can I do about that?

He really seems to not like windown, I've tried different versions and the only thing h really seems to like is walking around for a long Period of time beforehand but I can't always do that either





Offline becj86

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 346
  • Posts: 10859
  • Location: Brisbane, Australia
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2011, 11:23:27 am »
Have you tried almost no wind down? He sounds like a spirited munchkin (lucky you with two of them, eh?) and may do better without the reminder that he's about to go to sleep - I know DS certainly did.

Rubbish weather here too, torrential rain or scorching heat...

Not a lot you can do about him picking up on your stress, hopefully some of it will be gone soon... have you tried writing it all down before bed or in the morning before anyone else wakes? I found that helpful, esp. when I burned it afterwards, or stabbed it with a pencil til it was just tiny bits of paper!
How about deep breathing exercises - in through the nose, out the nose - may even be calming for Levi if you walk around with him while doing that.
Guessing you don't get a lot of time to just sit and relax yourself into a trance-like state - I lie down nice and comfy, eyes closed and think about my favourite place to be, count backwards from 10 thinking of different aspects of said favourite place and find myself relaxing almost subconsciously. Even if you do it to help you relax into sleep at the end of the day, it may help. I find I can visualise thoughts running across my sight, but they're just colour blocks and somehow my mind clears a bit.

He may not need low stimulation all the time - maybe just before naps... Would Caleb sit and read with Levi, or some other relatively quiet activity - singing songs, animal names/sounds matching with pictures, tell him stories? I know its a bit much to ask him to be still all the time, but what about that as the last activity before nap time, so he's still around the family and not doing a 'proper' wind down, but still getting one IYSWIM.

Offline *Jo*

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 148
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7314
  • 3 wee monkeys and a Mamma
  • Location:
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #6 on: December 07, 2011, 18:39:20 pm »
Well I tried what you suggested and he didnt self settle for his nap, I just went in and patted him to sleep. I still can't believe at nearly 5 months old his A time is still so low at 1 hour 25! He looks tired well before that though.

I don't mind so much helping him fall asleep, it's the transition part that's frustrating and I never know if he's gonna go back to sleep. I can't even get a nap in because I have to be up at 40mins to try and get him back to sleep!

Hmmm. I just dont kniw





Offline *Jo*

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 148
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 7314
  • 3 wee monkeys and a Mamma
  • Location:
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2011, 19:16:42 pm »
And he woke at 35mins... Wouldn't go back to sleep FFs! Why won't this kid just sleep!!!!





Offline firsttimemummy

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 62
  • Posts: 5116
  • gone to enjoy the little things in life (my boys)
  • Location: Scotland
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #8 on: December 07, 2011, 19:39:11 pm »
And he woke at 35mins... Wouldn't go back to sleep FFs! Why won't this kid just sleep!!!!
with Oliver I used to just get him up and if he was still tired 5-10 mins later I would put him back to bed ::) Sometimes he was fine with a short nap so I just went with it. 
L x Having a bw break from 1 Feb 2012 - if you want to get in touch please send me a pm.  I may not be here but you are all in my thoughts xxxx (probably be back some time)

still happily married, just not counting!

Offline becj86

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 346
  • Posts: 10859
  • Location: Brisbane, Australia
Re: scared the OT monster is gonna come back, please help
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2011, 23:27:20 pm »
It could be the accumulated OT just keeping that A time low. How was his night last night? DS' A time is always lower when he's had an OT night sleep.

Quote from: *Jo* on Today at 07:16:42 PM
And he woke at 35mins... Wouldn't go back to sleep FFs! Why won't this kid just sleep!!!!
I used to feel a bit like that with DS... Eventually I just got him up if he wouldn't resettle and kept trying. Some days he would be fine, others he screamed every time I went down the hallway with him :(
Sorry I have no silver bullet for you.

I wish I could fly over there and help you. {{HUGS}}